3 things .....we'll be well on our way

[Thundar301]

hello family , have had a lot of think time in that big ole truck of mine, doing a lot of reading and write like a fiend anyways. I have been keen the the openmindedness of the program and have said since rehab, that my acceptance in any given situation is directly related to my willingness in that situation. I have strugled with the honesty for a great deal of my 1st year in recovery, admiting my side of my actions to myself. It is a hard pattern of thinking to change and easily creeps back like an old friend, did I know right form wrong as i did the deed or deeds ..yes, but did I care ...no was I being honest with myself..no was I being honest to those around me ... only when I could benefit from the truth! today I know I can benefit from the truth , if I am true to myself and in my actions the I cause no harm to me or to these around me , I have less to remember because I no longer have to prepetuate the lie and keep it growing. I can see that there are 2 choices the majority of the time , the honest choice either right or wrong , or the justified choice were I rationalized my thinking to fit what I wanted to happen.
I could never have seen this thinking pattern or work to keep me out of the way, while I was out there being sick, not caring, trying to come up , but ending up way down , thank may higher power that I put that shovel down and stopped digging myself deeper, I am still climbing 2 years + later ,,, best exercise ,,, all mental too lol... today I am still sick, I can say that honestly, but I am so not as sick as I once was, my thinking is getting better , but i still bounce my thoughts off those in my close circle before I act, because I got me here with my best thinking once... I try to continue to stay openminded about everything and not rush to judgement, some days I am more willing than others, but if i lose the honesty I lose the fight and I will give up everything I have worked so hard to get, do and be the last 2 years 26 days.... so I am on my way but still just beginning , thanks for letting me rant, Dean

[Chance]

Thanks for the post Dean yes honesty isn't easy to practice but it does have the best results from it. Not always the results that we want but usually what is best.

With Love

Vic

[REZ]

Keep on truckin'

[Thundar301]

Originally Posted by REZ

Keep on truckin'

we'll do , need to hit the other 6 states sometime so I have all the lower 48 driven through, LOL, ain't going let them catch me noooo , ain't going to let them catch the Midnight Rambler....