I don't know what to do!!

[Madalaina]

Hi everyone!

I haven't posted in a while, but I kinda have a dilemma, and I really do not know what to do!

Here's the problem...

I have a sponsee that I am working with. She just found out that she is pregnant. She told her boyfriend, and he is not happy. The problem is that her boyfriend is my sponsor's son. So now, my sponsee and her boyfriend are fighting. He told his Mom that she said all kinds of stuff about her, and so my sponsor called me and asked me if I talked to her, and what did she say. Well first of all, what my sponsee tells me, I don't think I need to be repeating. And second I just see this thing as turning into a big mess. Something that I don't need.

My sponsor told me that she didn't think that this was going to work, but she needs to talk to her sponsor first. Basically, she told me that I might end up having to find a new sponsor. And then she called me back and said not to worry about it, we just would not talk about this girl.

Yall, I don't know what to do! I don't want to find a new sponsor, but I have a strange feeling that this may not turn out real nice. I just want to scream. I have had this sponsor for a yr. now, and I don't know what to do. Should I tell my sponsee that she may need to find a new sponsor? I get the stangest feeling that's not the answer. I just don't think that is the right thing to do. I just don't know! Any advice would be helpful!

Thank!
Alissa

[Moontime]

And then she called me back and said not to worry about it, we just would not talk about this girl.

That is sentence says it all for me. I don't know what you should do, but I know prayer works. I know that I should be able to tell my sponsor about anything and everything and that he doesn't control on what I can share with him.

He told his Mom that she said all kinds of stuff about her, and so my sponsor called me and asked me if I talked to her, and what did she say

I wouldn't break my sponsees anonymity to even my sponsor. Now, I've asked my sponsee if certain things come up if I can go to talk to my sponsor about something.. Secondly, this isn't drama queen school, this is about the disease of addiction. This disease kills. Who said what about who nonsense will kill people. Words are bullets.

[StrongR2Day]

Well said, Moontime.

Should I tell my sponsee that she may need to find a new sponsor? I get the stangest feeling that's not the answer.

I think you answered your own question on that one.

[dalin]

put first things first.stay out of other folks drama...
easy to say but hard to do.
hang in there.we need you

[Blake]

Alissa,

Own what is yours, the rest, let go.

If your sponsor has some hang ups about your sponsee and her son having a baby and fighting, that's sounds kinda normal to me....sponsors have emotions and aren't perfect either. If she has some strong recovery, she'll deal with it.

You did a good thing by not breaking your sponsee's anonymity and trust. Broken trust is very very hard to fix.

Keep your serenity pray handy, and all will be well....

[godsonmyside]

If yall can agree to be disagreeable, than its all good. If shee finds it that she needs you to move on because she needs room to grow through this situation, so be it.
My sponsor and sponsee's just don't talk about others. Your sponsee needs your help, not to back away and leave her in the dust. It has nothing to do with you and his mom. Control is a bad issue for addicts. Pray, Pray and Pray some more.

Peace,
Todd J.