Step #6..Am I Willing?

[Clean4ever]

I started doing some work on the 6th step. My sponsor helped get me through steps #1-5. I understand "I cant go at this alone" Step 1..But, I still try. I see I can change with the "help of others" Step 2...But push people away. Ive developed a relationship with a Higher Power ie..God and "Made a Decision" to act on His Will Step 3 But, self-will always FEELS better in the moment. I started writing about some "STUFF" Step 4.... and Ive seen some patterns that I shared with my sponsor Step 5 . Now I see "My defects". Most, I believe stem from "FEAR"...Im not smoking crack but, Im still hiding. I run, but always find myself with myself. Yes, Im in the "PROCESS OF CHANGE". I dont want to but I want to. If drugs was my "ONLY" problem I would have been healed already. Wow, I believe My Defects are why I USED in the first place, so that I can get a little relief from these character traits that are killing me on the inside. This isnt fun...Picking up that first drug wont take this away in the long run...Ive tried that for years...CHANGE, CHANGE, CHANGE...Am I Willing? Am I?.....Clean

[poisondartfrog]

Picking up the drug wont take care of hiding those character defects true. But picking up the step work can certainly put us in the place of healing and removing those defects. About that self weill and feeling good for the moment, if it feels good for the moment it is probably not your will, TURN IT OVER! Thanks for you post I will be going over my 5th step with my sponsor tomorrow and starting the 6th step Sunday, WOOT WOOT.

[Clean4ever]

Looking Ahead......The spiritual healing begins when we realize and turn to a Higher Power who will not betray our trust, a reliable God, a kind and loving God who can know us as we really are and still love and care for us. A God who can provide a sense of well being that will not go away in a few hours. A God who can provide a sense of power that will not wear off. A God who might not take away our pain, but will give us the strenght to carry on, if we let Him. A God who will guide our relationships with those we love. A God who will value our relationship with Him and stay with us always.........(pg.75 The 12 Steps of AA interpreted by James Brandon)

[Clean4ever]

Working on steps 6 & 7 is an ongoing process. Just as a plant has to be watered again and again, so does faith. It needs care and attention to remain strong and healthy...Maybe this is an area which we could make use of the willpower that was so useless to us in our attempts to stop drinking or using on our own...Will is simply the power to choose..We have the power to choose to do whatever we need to do to nourish our faith no matter how tenuous it my be. We can choose to go to meetings, read the daily readings, and to live the 12 steps honestly...We can choose to go to ANY length in pursue of recovery..And we can choose to pray unselfishly....

[Clean4ever]

How ready am I ? Really...!!! Do I want some relief from my character flaws? How willing am I to be freed from my defects ? Well, for me, this Step simply says "We were entirely ready to have God remove"....What ?? "These Defects". Which ones ? Well, If I did Steps 4 & 5 it is'nt going to be that hard to see "The Exact Nature" of these acts (Step#4), which are "My Defects". At first I didnt really understand what this Step was asking, but today going over it with my Sponsor opened my eyes just a little bit more (awareness). Step Six for me means to be in a state of readiness. This is a process and I need to be gentle with myself. I feel that Willingness also plays a role. With my new understanding I move to Step Seven......Thank God for Sponsors, Clean

[Gmoney]

"We were entirely ready to have God remove"....What ?? "These Defects". Which ones ?

All that we admitted to in Step 5.

The process of becoming "entirely ready" is just that...a process. And not only is it a process, it's a lifelong process. It is often said that, "You don't know what you don't know." And I've found this to be true. Although I may have sought to be as thorough as possible in becoming aware of what my defects of character are, I still may discover during my journey that there are more that need to be included in Step 5. As I increase my awareness, I also increase my readiness. It's kinda like the old, "Cross the bridge when I get there," kinda thing. At this point, I just deal with what I have at hand, and as you stated - willingness plays a very important role.