Starting my 4th step... - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Clean4ever · 06-17-2010, 11:17 PM

Hello everyone saturday I meet with my sponsor to confirm me writing my fourth step. Any suggestions. Im open. I believe that my 3rd step commitment means moving on to the next step. I have lots of things I need to address and recovery is more than not picking up. I NEED to see myself as I am. Im only sick as my secrets. Wow thats sick then. lol ....Anyway stay strong ......

thanks...Peter F.

ANGELINA243 · 06-17-2010, 11:33 PM

How are you writing your 4th step? I used the NA step working guide. Just be honest--whatever method/format you and your sponsor are following to work through the steps together. The 4th step can be a very freeing experience.

Clean4ever · 06-18-2010, 12:45 PM

Hey Angelina I'll find out tommorrow what guide I'll be using. Most likely the NA guide. Im really looking forward to start the inventory process. Anyway take care...Peter

Clean4ever · 06-29-2010, 06:06 PM

Hey thought I share that my sponsor dropped off the NA step guide.So I started writing yesterday...Today I started my list of resentments..Boy Its long and Im not done. lol..I pretty much resent evreyone in my family..Boy Im sensitive..Im getting better though..Any suggestions Im open..thanks, Peter F.

Clean4ever · 07-01-2010, 06:14 AM

Last night I spoke to my sponsor about some patterns im seeing in my resentments...From when I was a little boy till now( Im 43 years old) its the same pattern Im a passive person and stuff my feeling and the end result is always the same RESENTMENT..I will continue to share my experience writing my 4th step....Clean

ANGELINA243 · 07-01-2010, 06:26 AM

Honesty and thoroughness is key. The more you can get out and go over with sponsor, the more relief you get--sooner rather than later. I was surprised to see that I had so many resentments too--some from long ago....perhaps even forgot about until I started writing. They say in NA that anything you think about is inventory material, whether people or institutions, plus your sponsor will also be able to help you. Better to write more than enough that not enough. We are as only as sick as our secrets. Resentments are indeed poison to us.

Clean4ever · 07-07-2010, 07:54 PM

Well Im done with my resentment and fear list and working on my shame/guilt. When a spoke to my sponsor I told him I just had to fall down on my knees and cry. All that resentment just built up. Wow Im trying my best. Just for today..Clean

Clean4ever · 07-10-2010, 01:37 PM

Im still writing..Im not giving up..Im trusting my Higher Power and sponsor in this process.....The ONLY mistake one could make on the 4th step is NOT to DO it...

Clean4ever · 07-15-2010, 06:47 AM

Hey just a quick update on my writing..I was going through the emotional wringer. I felt so drained so I put the writing aside for a day. I was having feeling of resentment,anger etc....Ive been staying in contact with my sponsor when I have questions or feel stuck. Im doing well today and I think Im a little more than half way through this step...Im seeing alot off STUFF....Clean....

Missybuns · 07-17-2010, 01:30 PM

ahh yes the 4th step emotional wringer! Kinda cool we can experience that without using huh? What a miracle. Press on!

Finding out who I really am through my 4th step is something I will always be grateful for.

Peace,
Missy

Clean4ever · 07-22-2010, 10:42 AM

Yes Missy pretty kool that WE actually can FEEL without using....Im almost complete with this step...Spoke to my sponsor....Ill do a few more excercises and move on to step 5....God is Good....Im grateful, clean, and ready..

Clean4ever · 08-15-2010, 03:53 AM

Just a quick update On starting a 4th step, My sponsor and I will be meeting up this week, hopefully monday, to do my 5th step..I've completed My 4th step yesterday. I've been going through a flood of emotions but thats not different from what it use to be like. Whats different is Im not sniffing coke, smoking crack & weed, and downing alcohol to numb my feelings......Clean

coffeedrinker · 08-15-2010, 04:14 AM

are you guys sure that you would be best served my doing your 5th step with your sponsor? what i mean, is that you are gonna dump a lot of stuff on that person, and with your sponsor you wil have an ongoing relationship. i wouldn't want to risk holding anything back because you know you will keep seeing him, or because you care how he views you. i think i would seek out someone who has done this before, and whom i can be completely totally honest with. i'm not saying you're going to be dishonest; it's just might be a risk - i realize i don't know you.

good luck to you with it, good for you, and peace...

augustwest · 08-16-2010, 06:10 AM

i would hope that nobody has a sponsor who hasn't done a 4th step. my sponsor has done all 12, more than once. i honestly couldn't imagine not doing my 4th step with my sponsor. i'm sure there's nothing in my 4th step that my sponsor hasn't heard, and probably done.

Clean4ever · 08-16-2010, 02:15 PM

4th step done.....It was a great exprience....I feel renewed.......Step #5 next...Im out..Clean

Clean4ever · 12-01-2010, 04:38 PM

I just completed the fourth step and Ive seen some patterns in my behavior..This is the start of me seeing the exact nature of things...Like if I stole..What was behind it...Simple...... FEAR of lacking...or not having enough..This step will help me in the remaining steps 5-9...Its my list of good and bad {moral} facts that can no longer be hidden in the dark. Im ready to expose myself 100%...This is Honesty on a deeper level than step one. My sponsor will help my see how my defects caused much trouble in steps 5-7. I see Courage, Faith, and Honesty as some principles Im working in this step..Im ready to share this with God ,My sponsor, and ofcourse myself..Now Im at Step Five......

06-17-2010, 11:17 PM	#1 (permalink)
Clean4ever Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 207 Blog Entries: 35	Starting my 4th step... Hello everyone saturday I meet with my sponsor to confirm me writing my fourth step. Any suggestions. Im open. I believe that my 3rd step commitment means moving on to the next step. I have lots of things I need to address and recovery is more than not picking up. I NEED to see myself as I am. Im only sick as my secrets. Wow thats sick then. lol ....Anyway stay strong ...... thanks...Peter F.

08-16-2010, 06:10 AM	#14 (permalink)
augustwest dopeless hope fiend Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Here. Now. Posts: 1,021	i would hope that nobody has a sponsor who hasn't done a 4th step. my sponsor has done all 12, more than once. i honestly couldn't imagine not doing my 4th step with my sponsor. i'm sure there's nothing in my 4th step that my sponsor hasn't heard, and probably done. __________________ Obstacles are stepping stones that guide us to our goals Fences are filters are that purify our souls

06-17-2010, 11:33 PM	#2 (permalink)
ANGELINA243 We Do Recover Top Banana Champion! Boomerang Mayhem Champion! Connect 4 Champion! Mini Putt 2 Champion! Car Champion! Shoot The Mail Champion! Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Texas Posts: 2,456 Blog Entries: 19	How are you writing your 4th step? I used the NA step working guide. Just be honest--whatever method/format you and your sponsor are following to work through the steps together. The 4th step can be a very freeing experience.

06-18-2010, 12:45 PM	#3 (permalink)
Clean4ever Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 207 Blog Entries: 35	Hey Angelina I'll find out tommorrow what guide I'll be using. Most likely the NA guide. Im really looking forward to start the inventory process. Anyway take care...Peter

06-29-2010, 06:06 PM	#4 (permalink)
Clean4ever Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 207 Blog Entries: 35	Hey thought I share that my sponsor dropped off the NA step guide.So I started writing yesterday...Today I started my list of resentments..Boy Its long and Im not done. lol..I pretty much resent evreyone in my family..Boy Im sensitive..Im getting better though..Any suggestions Im open..thanks, Peter F.

07-01-2010, 06:14 AM	#5 (permalink)
Clean4ever Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 207 Blog Entries: 35	Last night I spoke to my sponsor about some patterns im seeing in my resentments...From when I was a little boy till now( Im 43 years old) its the same pattern Im a passive person and stuff my feeling and the end result is always the same RESENTMENT..I will continue to share my experience writing my 4th step....Clean

07-01-2010, 06:26 AM	#6 (permalink)
ANGELINA243 We Do Recover Top Banana Champion! Boomerang Mayhem Champion! Connect 4 Champion! Mini Putt 2 Champion! Car Champion! Shoot The Mail Champion! Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Texas Posts: 2,456 Blog Entries: 19	Honesty and thoroughness is key. The more you can get out and go over with sponsor, the more relief you get--sooner rather than later. I was surprised to see that I had so many resentments too--some from long ago....perhaps even forgot about until I started writing. They say in NA that anything you think about is inventory material, whether people or institutions, plus your sponsor will also be able to help you. Better to write more than enough that not enough. We are as only as sick as our secrets. Resentments are indeed poison to us.

07-07-2010, 07:54 PM	#7 (permalink)
Clean4ever Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 207 Blog Entries: 35	Well Im done with my resentment and fear list and working on my shame/guilt. When a spoke to my sponsor I told him I just had to fall down on my knees and cry. All that resentment just built up. Wow Im trying my best. Just for today..Clean

07-10-2010, 01:37 PM	#8 (permalink)
Clean4ever Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 207 Blog Entries: 35	Im still writing..Im not giving up..Im trusting my Higher Power and sponsor in this process.....The ONLY mistake one could make on the 4th step is NOT to DO it...

07-15-2010, 06:47 AM	#9 (permalink)
Clean4ever Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 207 Blog Entries: 35	Hey just a quick update on my writing..I was going through the emotional wringer. I felt so drained so I put the writing aside for a day. I was having feeling of resentment,anger etc....Ive been staying in contact with my sponsor when I have questions or feel stuck. Im doing well today and I think Im a little more than half way through this step...Im seeing alot off STUFF....Clean....

07-17-2010, 01:30 PM	#10 (permalink)
Missybuns Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Indiana Posts: 1,485	ahh yes the 4th step emotional wringer! Kinda cool we can experience that without using huh? What a miracle. Press on! Finding out who I really am through my 4th step is something I will always be grateful for. Peace, Missy

07-22-2010, 10:42 AM	#11 (permalink)
Clean4ever Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 207 Blog Entries: 35	Yes Missy pretty kool that WE actually can FEEL without using....Im almost complete with this step...Spoke to my sponsor....Ill do a few more excercises and move on to step 5....God is Good....Im grateful, clean, and ready..

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08-15-2010, 03:53 AM	#12 (permalink)
Clean4ever Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 207 Blog Entries: 35	Just a quick update On starting a 4th step, My sponsor and I will be meeting up this week, hopefully monday, to do my 5th step..I've completed My 4th step yesterday. I've been going through a flood of emotions but thats not different from what it use to be like. Whats different is Im not sniffing coke, smoking crack & weed, and downing alcohol to numb my feelings......Clean

08-15-2010, 04:14 AM	#13 (permalink)
coffeedrinker Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: minneapolis, mn Posts: 2,761	are you guys sure that you would be best served my doing your 5th step with your sponsor? what i mean, is that you are gonna dump a lot of stuff on that person, and with your sponsor you wil have an ongoing relationship. i wouldn't want to risk holding anything back because you know you will keep seeing him, or because you care how he views you. i think i would seek out someone who has done this before, and whom i can be completely totally honest with. i'm not saying you're going to be dishonest; it's just might be a risk - i realize i don't know you. good luck to you with it, good for you, and peace...

08-16-2010, 02:15 PM	#15 (permalink)
Clean4ever Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 207 Blog Entries: 35	4th step done.....It was a great exprience....I feel renewed.......Step #5 next...Im out..Clean

12-01-2010, 04:38 PM	#16 (permalink)
Clean4ever Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Posts: 207 Blog Entries: 35	I just completed the fourth step and Ive seen some patterns in my behavior..This is the start of me seeing the exact nature of things...Like if I stole..What was behind it...Simple...... FEAR of lacking...or not having enough..This step will help me in the remaining steps 5-9...Its my list of good and bad {moral} facts that can no longer be hidden in the dark. Im ready to expose myself 100%...This is Honesty on a deeper level than step one. My sponsor will help my see how my defects caused much trouble in steps 5-7. I see Courage, Faith, and Honesty as some principles Im working in this step..Im ready to share this with God ,My sponsor, and ofcourse myself..Now Im at Step Five......