OOOOOOHHHH - The Pain , The Shame !!! - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

upanddownjj · 08-01-2006, 07:22 PM

I can't stand this up & down crap !!! I just got it together to go to the online meeting, really enjoyed it and now I am spiralling down...I hate this !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My Dr. is just back fm a months holiday - so I sent an e-mail today to see if I have my reg. appt Fri....But - after all this time, when I go down and can't be "my Cheery Self" I feel so full of shame even tho I know this isn't my fault..I just hate my powerlessness over it..I can't stop thinking when I'm feeling well that OK I'm cured now...I don't want to accept or even acknowledge that this will come back..
Electroshock trtmt has been advised for me...I don't think I'm THAT BAD..but upon investigation, it has progressed beyond "one flew over the cuckoos nest days"..I've spoken to a few pple who've had it and they've done well...I'm nervous tho about possible memory loss...
Anyone out there had it ????

Janni

ranae1221 · 08-01-2006, 08:02 PM

i hate the up and down crap too....the roller coaster of life.

i belive shutterbug has had ECT, and she says it has really helped her. I have never had it, or had it recommended to me, but I have considered it. My grandmother did have it back in the times it was done in a not so great way, and it really messed her up. But I know it is done in a much better and safer way nowadays.

upanddownjj · 08-01-2006, 08:04 PM

Thank you sooooo much - I've waited so long for a reply !!!!

I thought it was becaouse it was negative - I just feel horrible tonight

Janni

notsleepingwell · 08-01-2006, 08:08 PM

Janni
I don't know anything about ECT...but just wanted to give you a hug and tell you I'm praying for you...

ranae1221 · 08-01-2006, 08:23 PM

sorry you had to wait so long for a reply! and i didn't find your post "negative", just you venting some of what you are feeling today. I surely have done that quite a few times.

I do know that when I was asking a bit about ECT, Shutterbug had recommended a book, "The Noonday Demon, An Atlas of Depression" by Andrew Solomon. She said it was really good, and talks about ECT in it. I haven't read very much of it so far, I haven't had the time. But I am always interested in learning more about depression and mental illness. If it can't help me personally, it comes in handy with my work.

I hope that you are feeling a bit better tonight. I know for me, last night was a really tough night, and I ended up going to bed early, at 730pm and didn't get up untill almost 10am today!! But I am feeling a little better today. Plus I left work early and treated myself to a movie. That usually helps to change my mood.

I just hope one day this roller coaster ride stops. Untill then, thank goodness for this place!

BSPGirl · 08-02-2006, 07:37 AM

ECT scares me...

Marte

ranae1221 · 08-02-2006, 10:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BSPGirl

ECT scares me...

it is defenitly not for everyone.....i know the very thought of it used to scare me, but during some of my low points, i considered it because it couldn't be worse than what i was feeling.

08-01-2006, 07:22 PM	#1 (permalink)
upanddownjj One Day At A Time Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: West Vancouver, BC Posts: 408	OOOOOOHHHH - The Pain , The Shame !!! I can't stand this up & down crap !!! I just got it together to go to the online meeting, really enjoyed it and now I am spiralling down...I hate this !!!!!!!!!!!!!! My Dr. is just back fm a months holiday - so I sent an e-mail today to see if I have my reg. appt Fri....But - after all this time, when I go down and can't be "my Cheery Self" I feel so full of shame even tho I know this isn't my fault..I just hate my powerlessness over it..I can't stop thinking when I'm feeling well that OK I'm cured now...I don't want to accept or even acknowledge that this will come back.. Electroshock trtmt has been advised for me...I don't think I'm THAT BAD..but upon investigation, it has progressed beyond "one flew over the cuckoos nest days"..I've spoken to a few pple who've had it and they've done well...I'm nervous tho about possible memory loss... Anyone out there had it ???? Janni

08-01-2006, 08:02 PM	#2 (permalink)
ranae1221 Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Arizona Posts: 318	i hate the up and down crap too....the roller coaster of life. i belive shutterbug has had ECT, and she says it has really helped her. I have never had it, or had it recommended to me, but I have considered it. My grandmother did have it back in the times it was done in a not so great way, and it really messed her up. But I know it is done in a much better and safer way nowadays. __________________ Jessica "You can have a perfectly normal life..... if you accept the fact that your life will never be perfectly normal" You laugh because I am different...I laugh because you are all the same

08-01-2006, 08:08 PM	#4 (permalink)
notsleepingwell I'm HOME!!!!! Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Hot flash city Posts: 562	Janni I don't know anything about ECT...but just wanted to give you a hug and tell you I'm praying for you... __________________ notsleepingwell 'We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience

08-01-2006, 08:23 PM	#5 (permalink)
ranae1221 Member Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Arizona Posts: 318	sorry you had to wait so long for a reply! and i didn't find your post "negative", just you venting some of what you are feeling today. I surely have done that quite a few times. I do know that when I was asking a bit about ECT, Shutterbug had recommended a book, "The Noonday Demon, An Atlas of Depression" by Andrew Solomon. She said it was really good, and talks about ECT in it. I haven't read very much of it so far, I haven't had the time. But I am always interested in learning more about depression and mental illness. If it can't help me personally, it comes in handy with my work. I hope that you are feeling a bit better tonight. I know for me, last night was a really tough night, and I ended up going to bed early, at 730pm and didn't get up untill almost 10am today!! But I am feeling a little better today. Plus I left work early and treated myself to a movie. That usually helps to change my mood. I just hope one day this roller coaster ride stops. Untill then, thank goodness for this place! __________________ Jessica "You can have a perfectly normal life..... if you accept the fact that your life will never be perfectly normal" You laugh because I am different...I laugh because you are all the same

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08-01-2006, 08:04 PM	#3 (permalink)
upanddownjj One Day At A Time Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: West Vancouver, BC Posts: 408	Thank you sooooo much - I've waited so long for a reply !!!! I thought it was becaouse it was negative - I just feel horrible tonight Janni

08-02-2006, 07:37 AM	#6 (permalink)
BSPGirl Member Join Date: May 2005 Location: Nowhere Posts: 889	ECT scares me... Marte

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