Dreams vrs. Reality and feelings

[ranae1221]

Does anyone ever have dreams that seems SO real that you have a hard time distinguinshing a dream from reality? Like you sometimes can't remember if something that happened was just in your dream or if it really happened?

I have had this happen alot, but more recently it has been harder than usual, because I wake up with the emotions that what happened in the dream was real.

For example, I had a long dream last night, basically involving that I was feeling really really depressed, called my aunt (who is also on of my closest friends) for someone to talk to. She got on the phone and told me "Please don't call me anymore. I have a family of my own to take care of and I don't have time to deal with your problems". I felt so alone and like such a loser, I tried to kill myself.

Now I really don't think my aunt would say anything like that. She has always been very understanding. But I woke up from that dream feeling very sad and alone, and feeling like I shouldn't call her. Just thinking about it makes me want to cry again. I KNOW this wasn't real, however my emotions FEEL like it was. Does that make sense?

I keep trying to remind myself that this wasn't real, that my aunt never said that, but I am having a hard time stopping or changing the way it has made me feel.

[Ngokpa]

I'm a fan of Carl Jung, who said dreams are the symbolic language of the unconscious. I've done a bunch of work with dreams, and whenever one has a lot of juice to it, it's talking about something serious. This may have little to do with your actual aunt, but it might have a lot to do with the role she plays in your life.

I did a lot of my dream work when I was in therapy, and when you get into some charged issues it helps to have a more objective viewpoint around. But regardless, the dreamer is the one mostly responsible for figuring out what the dream is getting at. Dreams compensate for the blind spots of our conscious mind.

[ranae1221]

yeah, i agree with you that dreams can often have a "deeper" meaning. i used to have a therapist that would do work with dreams, and when I would share them with her, it was really interesting to see the meaning behind them.

i guess what bothers me though about these dreams is the fact that the feelings in these dreams stay with me long after i wake up. all day yesterday i was really down and sad, and felt very alone, even though nothing (other than the dream) had really happened to give me that impression.

Then there are the dreams that seem so real, i have a hard time remembering if something happened in real life or in the dream. For example, a few weeks ago I dreamt that my therapy appt. had been rescheduled from Friday to Monday. All day Friday I kept having to remind myself that my appt. was that day, not Monday and that had only been a dream.

Am I the only one that does this? I am beginning to worry that it may be something more, or maybe I am "crazier" than I thought.

[liveweyerd]

I also have at times difficulty figuring out whether something really happened or whether I dreamed it. Sometimes I am unable to figure it out and sometimes I have to reality check and ask others. I dream very vividly.

Nor do I find it unusual to have emotional hangovers, if you will. Dreams can be very powerful emotionally. And emotions don't necessarily obey the logical mind. I often have to work through the subconcious processing the dreams are working on in order to lift the emotional power, and at times I just ride it out.

[shutterbug]

haven't read most of the post, but yes...Lately, after getting up and starting to get ready for work...there have been several days where this has happened. Usually they are small, fairly insugnificant things, but it agrivates all heck out of me while thinking the memory had really occured during the night or the day before and then having to think very hard about it - being totally confused before finally deciding it was a dream.

Strange, and a new one for me...

[Lilya]

I´ve reading this thread with interest.

I have never been able to understand if I had a so called Out of Body Experience or if it was a dream. It happened before I started using drugs; I was very young at the time and had no idea what out of body experience was.

I was twelve and fell asleep like I normally did. I had a dream about something I don´t remember. Then I woke up. I wanted to look at the alarm clock as I usually did, but I couldn´t. I was paralysed. I wanted to scream, but there was no sound. I heard sounds of thunder and then I saw myself lying on the bed. "That´s it," I thought. "This is how people die." I felt incredibly sad because I felt I was too young to die.

I felt I was pulled up by the shoulders and started travelling inside huge tunnels. There was darkness and I felt the presence of other people travelling with me. The speed was incredible. Then I was pulled up again into a dimension totally foreign to me. The colours were all totally different from what I´ve seen. There was a very strange golden light that overwhelmed me and I didn´t want to see it. I resisted it. Then my dead grandfather greeted me. He looked younger than when he died. He took my hand and told me that I was merely leaving my body for a while, then I would go back because this was not the time of my death.

I went back, got inside my body which was like diving into a hot swimming-pool and I could move again. I was so terrified I couldn´t sleep by myself for a long time. I also thought I was stark raving mad for a long time. I had no idea what happened to me.

I am not really religious and never have been. I mix all kinds of religions and concepts; that´s what I rely on. My father is a non-religious man. Later, I read about other people´s near death experiences and I found it amazing that our experiences were so alike. People from different culture, all over the world.

I cherish this memory/dream/out of body experience/ or whatever, because it made me think there were different dimensions out there, that haven´t been discovered. Both Einstein and Marie Curie believed there was more to this life than the eye can see; it just needs to be discovered. I tend to agree, otherwise I like to keep an open mind about this. Who knows?

When I started to do drugs, I wanted to induce this experience. I never could, and nothing on drugs felt as powerful as this.

Has anyone here has a similar experience?

Love and light,

[hoobie]

Hi Ranae1221,

Your dreams seem really powerful. Have you ever thought of keeping a dream journal? Maybe you'll notice a pattern or at least be able to sort out feelings.

I'm considering starting one as I've had really odd and moving dreams since I stopped drinking 8 days ago. The first day I stopped drinking, I had just taken a few online alcohism screening tests and failed them. I was in bed questioning my drinking and feeling lost. I went to sleep and dreamed the same dream all night. I was in a yellow therapists room with a man I knew few years ago in grad school. He was a prof of mine and he was a great guy but I really didn't know anything about him. In my dream, he told me he was an alcoholic and we spent the whole night talking, laughing and crying. He said I'd be okay. I felt LIBERATED the next day. I was so comforted by it. Since then, each night I dream that I'm meeting various people from my past and learning things about them, talking them though problems, laughing, dancing....the dreams seem to go all night.

Anyway, I hope you hang in there. There have been times when I honsetly can't remember if something was a dream or real. Take care!

[InvisibleNobody]

I too have had times when I wouldn't know if what had occured was part of a dream, or part of reality. And it can get so frustrating. So much so, that there are times when I have to ask someone else if something had happened (in reality) or not.

I'm not sure why it happens, but I'm sure that there has to be a reason for it. So, if I can't figure it out then, I just try to ride it out, and let Time tell me what that reason is.

[ranae1221]

So much so, that there are times when I have to ask someone else if something had happened (in reality) or not.

LOL........I do that allot too!!! Many in my family are used to it now and don't even think much about it when I ask them!


Thanks everyone for your replies. Although I am not sure why I always have such vivid dreams, at least I know I am not alone!

[cinderellawkids]

I have had lots of trouble distinguishing dreams from reality. To be completely honest most of my teen years and early adult years I ahve no idea anymore what really happened or did not. 6 months ago I found a journal from when I was 15, it talks about substance abuse pills and depression as well as being physically attacked. I had no memory of this at all, I am not sure what happened and what didnt and even worse noone else knows either. Because of my intense descriptions of withdrawal symptoms together with my mom and my counselor we decided it was obvious at that age I was taking my mothers Xxanax, at a time when my mom had such severe depression and switched so many meds no one would have noticed.

Even now, if Im not really careful Im not sure whats real and what is not, so I try to write things down in letters and store them. I also have a tendency to create in daydreams the scenario you described with your aunt and isolate feeling its real. Your mind is a powerful thing it can create both wonderful and detrimental things.