Comments about CBT (therapy)

[runningfree]

Good day all...

Does anyone or any "many" have opinions, experience, description and/or facts about cognitive behavior therapy. I have been recommended to go for a consult and I have no idea what is done, how it is done and what to expect. It really seems rather odd that I have been in therapy for 18 months and I still face the same feelings without much relief and this is supposed to take a few sessions. Do they have magic dust?
I am not sure if it will benefit me or hurt me that the doctor is adorable and so very nice.
Comments welcome... thank you

[pedagogue]

Originally Posted by runningfree

Good day all...

Does anyone or any[I]"many"[/I] have opinions, experience, description and/or facts about cognitive behavior therapy. I have been recommended to go for a consult and I have no idea what is done, how it is done and what to expect. It really seems rather odd that I have been in therapy for 18 months and I still face the same feelings without much relief and this is supposed to take a few sessions. Do they have magic dust?
I am not sure if it will benefit me or hurt me that the doctor is adorable and so very nice.
Comments welcome... thank you

CBT can be very useful, depending upon the patient involved. My first question is, what type of therapy have you been doing for the past 18 months? (I am assuming a traditional psychodynamic approach) I have included a link below that will give you an overview of CBT. I just skimmed the site, but it seems pretty straight forward: http://www.cognitivetherapy.com/basics.html

A more in-depth explaination is here: (http://www.cognitivetherapy.com/fuller.html).

As for "magic dust".....alas, it does not do that, however many people find CBT more empowering because it forces you to have a more active role in the therapy. (I know, it sounds odd, but it is true) Also, there are visible and attainable goals that can be set, and small victories seem to really help the process. It isn't an end-all be-all cure, but for many, CBT is a managable solution that will show results much quicker than other traditional forms of therapy.

-pedagogue

[Wolfstarr]

Running Free,
I was just reading your post and knew absolutely nothing about CBT. I went to the site that pedagogue listed above and what an eye opener! I bookedmarked it and plan to go back many times. Thanks for this thread...I read some stuff I never realized about myself...
Good luck to you and my thoughts are with you!

[shutterbug]

Wolfstarr, you made me think of something I've noticed...

I find if funny that we live with ourselfs 24-hours a day for our entire lives and we often find that most of our realizations about ourselves come from outside sources!!! I mean for example: How did I not realize until recently that my severe co-dependency problems were destroying every attempt I've ever made to find a good and healthy relationship?? You would think I would have seen that one coming from a mile away. And how did not not realize that the mood swings I've had all my life were not "normal." I mean when I found what it meant to be bipolar, suddenly everything made since...childhood problems, sleeping problems, problems in my teen years and college days. It just goes to show that we never really know ourselves as well as we think we do!

Runningfree, I don't know about CBT and can't focus well enough to read through the above Web site, but I started seeing a pychologist Monday and he said my theropy will be an active one with homework assignments like reading certain books and start walking again to help my body overcome the depression. I'm wondering if this kind of theropy is CBT?

I felt the affects before that even a little exercise has on my depression so I know I have to start walking again, even if it's only a block a day, but that seems so hard right now when my body and mind just wants to shut down.

Keeping you in my prayers,
Jenna

[runningfree]

From what I gather from the literature and the doctor that I will be seeing is that it is a VERY STRUCTURED type of therapy. It is not based on just talking about how your week has been or what has been going on, but it is very symptom focused. It takes one behavior or feeling at a time and the doctor is an active verbal participant. I guess he/she does not have the patient do all the talking but actively gives feedback and presents different challenges and thoughts. There is "homework assignments" that focus on the area being worked on. My first session is Tuesday so I am sure that I will know more at that time.
Thanks

[shutterbug]

That sounds just like the session I had Monday. I don't like to just talk and not get feedback. I want my delusional thinking challenged, BY CROCKY! So I'm glad to be starting out with that kind of theropy. REALLY GLAD. Good luck Tuesday. My session was very pleasant. I was even glad to find out that it is a Christian counseling service! He asked me if I was attending church regularly, which I haven't in years, but am more spiritual than I ever have been. So I explained things to him and he agreed with me that "First Things First" was the best way for me to do things. I mean when I can't even get out of bed for, well for just about anything, then it will be pretty darn hard for me to make myself go to a 10 a.m. church service without falling asleep. Or even a 7 p.m. one for that matter! lol

Tell us how it goes Tuesday. My next one is Monday, so if I can make it to it, then I will let you guys know how it went.

Hugs,
Jenna

[runningfree]

The session went fine. The Dr. is VERY nice and I have good vibes from his presence that prehaps this might do a little something. We didn't get too far because I had a lot of history to cover for him. I do have a homework assignment to journal my stressful moments in the day. What will I pick? I guess it is worth teh 4 hour roundtrip including the session. I may have to take off some days to go during the day because going at night from 3:30 - 7:30 is kind of draining.

[splendra]

.....the fact that he doesn't hurt your eyes has to help something. Looking forward to hearing how it goes !!!

[pedagogue]

I'm glad my post helped! CBT is a pretty popular method and can really be helpful for the right people. The "homework" is an intrical part because it not only keeps the patient engaged throughout the week, but it is also incredibly useful during the therapy session. Many times "homework" can be great for showing progress. I may be a bit biased because I plan on using CBT as a focal point in my sessions. (at least that is the plan. I am still exploring a number of other alternatives)

-pedagogue

[shutterbug]

Hi guys, well I had my 2nd session this week and wasn't as thrilled about it. However, I'm not blaming the doc really. I've been kinda in a mixed state I guess this past week or so and I kept switching topics on him. He hasn't asked me to fill him in on my history either which kinda has me preterbed because how can he help if he doesn't know the whole story? He also spends most of our sessions explaining himself in detail (like giving me made up situation) to help me "fully" comprehend what he is telling me. Ummmm, am I 12 years old or something? I mean I look younger than I am, but geeeze!

During my first session he said bipolar has come to be a catchall diagnosis so he basically (although politely) told me he that I may be wrong...oh and the 2 general doctors who both (seperately) diagnosed me and the pychiatrist I saw while in the hospital. But he doesn't know that yet because he hasn't asked.

Sorry, I guess I'm more bitter about this than I thought. The guys really nice and he is here in town so those are pluses. I just don't like being talked down to...If he is talking about a brown cow, I don't know why he thinks he has to explain to me what a cow is and how come some are brown and others are black and white!!!! Okay, so that's a little exaturated, but you get the point.

I'm going to write my background and stuff down to give to him at our next session and I'm going to make a list of specific things I need addressed in therapy. Hey, I'm going to get some benefit out of this stuff even if I have to remind him what his job is at each session! Go me!


HOPE YOUR SESSIONS ARE BETTER.

[runningfree]

I only had one and he was very nice and he explained everything very well, but not too much. He wanted to start with the background, but we ran over because I had too much background so that made me feel a little uneasy. I am supposed to start a journal of the problematic times of the day and journal the stuff that is going on. I haven't been really good at this yet because I feel that more background is necessary. I don't want to overwhelm him, but I always feel that more info is better than no info. It will save us from having to discuss it in the "critical session time" He suggested that I e-mail my journaling stuff because I wanted to type it anyway instead of handwrite it. I am apprehensive about sending a lot and also want to move on to the real stuff and don't want to labor over background. I think I just answered my own question and I will tell him all I can so that we hopefully can move on. If perhaps it is too much then he can tell me.
It is Tuesday night. I have a lot riding on this so I hope like hel# it works for something.

[liveweyerd]

GOOD TO GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Me, I don't want background....been there, done that, done.

Each according to her/his own needs!

Shutterbug, tell him your IQ straight out, that will settle the analogies and explanations, he just doesn't know you yet.

[eddie z.]

Hey, (((Sharon)))!!!
Just stopping by to deliver some virtual therapy. Congrats on starting the CBT. It should be good for all those negative thoughts you struggle with, I think. Glad to see you're still around. You haven't seen Brent, have you? Well, I hope the CBT helps! Love and hugs, Eddie :

[shutterbug]

runningfree - I think it's a good idea to type your background and e-mail it to him, but be sure and keep an electronic copy for yourself. Like Live said, "Been there, done that, done," if you type it and save it, then you will always have it if you should ever need to "inform" anyone else in the future. I think it could possible save time in the future if you ever have to change docs for any reason. I'm sorry that you have to drive so far, but I really think this kind of therapy may have something to it. So hang in there GF! :hamburger

Live - this is really my first time in therapy so I feel a need to work on background issues like abandonment by my mother, the emotional and physical absense of my father, the mental abuse from my step-mother and step-sister, and being molested by my uncle - not to mention all the other co-dependency issues relating to my father and step-fathers alcohol abuse and then of course my bipolar issues. Wew, no wonder I'm so overwhelmed. I want to be healthy now, but I know I have a long road ahead. I just have to stay strong and I will. Oh, and pychologist deal with so many different people on a daily basis that I know it must be hard to try and adapt to each, but I don't necessarily think that is the best way. I think he should state to new patients this, "Initially, it's impossible for me to know how each person will percieve or understand the feed back I give them, so I ask everyone not to be afraid to stop me at anytime for clarification or meanings. This makes things easier on us both because I will know that I've explained things in a way that also makes sense to you and you won't feel lost or talked down to which will result in more successful sessions." I could be wrong I guess, but I think that would set a good tone and then he could treat everyone the same.

SOCIO ECONOMIC DIFFERENCE NOTICED!!!...
I had my 3rd session today and it was a much better session than the last. I had journaled my background, but decided not to take it to him just yet. When we started, he said, "During the second session I like to start by asking my patients how felt about the first."

I pointed out to him that this was in fact my 3rd and that I felt great about the first, but uneasy about the second. The second had been at his other office on a college campus and he didn't have my file with him that day. I told him that session seemed caotic and without direction. I also expression my thoughts about him not knowing any of my background. He explained that he does not always background and other times he does extensive backgrounding. He further said the patient is often more aware of what direction things need to head in, so since I felt backgrounding was important he wanted to spend most of the session on it. I think he was shocked. He kept exclaiming, "Wow," as I told him about my childhood. Near the end he said he was really glad that we did some backgrounding because it gave him a lot of information about my situation.

The socio-economic thing that I realized after the session is that... in this session he had my file with him and knew (as he did in the first session) about my educational background and profession. This third session went extremely well. Then boom, it hit me! I think it's a fair assesment to say he had been down talking me in the second session because he hadn't remembered I had a college education. This kinda pisses me off. Just because people don't have college or even high school degrees doesn't make them stupid morons :nono: . I know a lot of very intellegent people who have little formal education.

I just wonder how many people's therapy suffers from stigmas or stereotyping. I'd venture to say it's possibly more than I'm comfortable about. I'm not blaming the doctor. He's a very nice christian man from what i know of him. I'm more or less blaming our society. It just goes to show that we are unfortunately judged by our resumes more often than we may be aware.

I noticed that in this third session he used bigger words and didn't keep explaining the same point over and over with different analogies. Well, he did linger a little too long on some of the personal stories he used to get his point across, but I think that's just his personality. I think he's just naturally long winded like I am. LOL.

All in all, I feel it was a very beneficial session.

[pedagogue]

Originally Posted by shutterbug

I just wonder how many people's therapy suffers from stigmas or stereotyping.

Hopefully fewer and fewer. The APA has really tried to increase therapist awareness over the past few years in regard to being sensative to diversity issues, which include differing cultures, SES, races, etc. I know they have continuing education requirements, and Diversity is a core to that. Hopefully through education they can eliminate this problem....but no one is perfect.

-pedagogue

[shutterbug]

Boy I certainly can be long winded sometimes. I think I think too much. Ya think? :shocked:

[runningfree]

Thanks for all the activity....

I've got my 3rd session tomorrow. I am fine when I am in the sessions, but when I get home then my mind takes over. We will see if tomorrow seems to make an impact.

[shutterbug]

best of luck to ya Runningfree!

[runningfree]

I not sure if it is because he is so nice, non-judgemental or just plain too good to be true, but I am sure I know why he is where he is today. He asks many questions and keeps probing almost as if to "catch" me in a spiral. This is all done in a tender, understanding way. There is a reason I am paying him $125.00 a session with no insurance. I hope it is not because he is kind that I am "listening" because I want this to be real! Just pinch me and tell me it is real!

[shutterbug]

Well since I can't pinch ya....

Do you know it's real yet?! Really glad to hear your sessions are going so well, but geeezze $125! My goodness. I'm so thankful for insurance because I would never be able to afford that. That is about how much my monthly car payment is and I struggle to pay that. For that kinda dough...he better be easy on the eyes.

I wish I had your doctor. Mine's married and older anyhow. And while I believe we may make progress someday....it's just not really happening yet. I don't feel like we communicate well with each other (of course, I'm not well right now and so my verbal skills may be a tad off). He has me doing assignments like filling in circles (one large one with things that concern me, but that I can't control and one small one of things that concern me that I can control, but HELLO.... I told him I am a recovering codie and I have learned what things I no longer have control over). So our sessions seem painfully slow in progression. Plus we usually talk about several completely different issues during a single session so there is absolutely no structure and it's driving me even more insane than I already am. LOL.

Maybe, I'm just being overly critical as a symptom of my bp. Hummm....something to think on.

[runningfree]

Wow, I have never had to log in before... I have been having some BIG problems with e-mail, but luckily my internet is working. My husband has been no help because he likes a woman that can handle things. Sorry that's not me. :sink Therefore I fell apart last weekend and we had a major fight. I am just trying to stay above water, but it is hard.
My sessions are so good, but I don't know where it is going. I think that I feel the same way, but I don't feel so guilty feeling that way. I am not sure if that is good because the negativeness to myself hasn't gone away. I have been able to stand up to my friend and tell her that I almost gave up my marriage, my life, my family and running for our friendship and I wasn't going to do it anymore. I am concentrating on myself and my family now.
I guess that is some improvement. Without her I do feel lonely because I don't have any other friends.
Until later :tounge-in

[pedagogue]

Originally Posted by runningfree

My sessions are so good, but I don't know where it is going. I think that I feel the same way, but I don't feel so guilty feeling that way. I am not sure if that is good because the negativeness to myself hasn't gone away. I have been able to stand up to my friend and tell her that I almost gave up my marriage, my life, my family and running for our friendship and I wasn't going to do it anymore. I am concentrating on myself and my family now.
I guess that is some improvement. Without her I do feel lonely because I don't have any other friends.
Until later :tounge-in

I hope this is on the mark (I had a hard time following you in the middle there. )

I am happy to hear that the therapy is proving to be helpful. One of the advantages of CBT is the ability to have tangible goals. During your next section you should review with your therapist what those goals are. Sometimes you will get off on tangents, but it is important to keep your overall goals in mind.

As for your friend...that is something that sounds like needed to be done. If she is a real friend she will understand and hopefully will be there for you. Have you talked to her about what you are going through? If you are proactive and show her how and why this is what you need to do, she might be a great asset to your continued progress.

Best of luck with the therapy.

-pedagogue

[runningfree]

Oh, I do think the doctor has something to do with it. He is worth the money that I spend for him. He know what to say, is not judgemental and he can take ANY feeling and bring some supportive statement to defend it. He pushes the right questions, but not forcefully. I am really liking this. I am bummed that it could only take a few sessions, but there are more problems than liking running again and having a clear outlook to my goals. I still feel like I am stubborn and/or helpless with "my" way of thinking.
I guess I have been very unactive on this site lately because I am going through a NUMB stage. I just don't feel anything.

[eddie z.]

Sharon,
How you are?
Love and hugs, Eddie

[shutterbug]

Just wanted to update...I will be starting an intensive outpatient program Monday. It will be a 6 hour a day thing and was suggested by my therapist - which may be the only thing he's done that may actually help me in some way. I'm putting all my eggs in this basket so I hope I don't loose it. It looks as though I will be doing the day treatment thing for at least 2 weeks and maybe longer at a cost of $500 a week to me after my insurance pays it's part - 80 percent! It better work because this is a lot of money and it will take me a long time before I can pay the bill off.

Anyway, my last session with my CBT therapist was awful. I expressed some very relevant issues in my life that I have had trouble with for as long as I can remember (being late, oversleeping, insomnia, day sleeping and how it makes it difficults to function at a job or anything where I have to be up at an early time and not be late). Instead of trying to give suggestions or try to help me, he just said I'm assuming that since I've had problems getting up and to things on time in a lot of my past, that I will have the same problems in the future. - Ummm...DUH!!!!

I told him how hard I have tried to remedy my sleeping problems and how hard I had tried to make it to work every day that week on time. And he said, "What do you think my wife woud say if I told her that I was going to try to be faithful to her?" He said he NEVER uses the word "try" and said basically that I could get there on time if I wanted to - that it was as simple as that, in a matter-of-fact tone. (Which I don't think his example is relevant to my over-sleeping problems that come from my illnesses and because I turn alarms off in my sleep or that they don't even wake me up. I mean, if he was unfaithful to his wife then it would be a conscious decision, unless he was drunk maybe.)

I became defensive b/c he was attacking my all my efforts to become healthy. I've done little more than concentrate on my mental and emotional health over the last 3 months, but yet he said to me, "If you continue on the path you are on then you will never get better."

I don't understand. When I asked what I could do to overcome my sleeping problems and be able to wake up when I need to and he said, "I don't know."

I just wanted and expected so much from these weekly therapy sessions, but instead he is deepening my self-hatred and adding more negative thinking to my already esteemless self.

I don't think I am going to continue seeing him. I will probably make one more apt. to confront him on his hurtful and unconstructive (and uninformed) critizisms. I will tell him why I am going to another psychologist in hopes that he may not treat someone else in the future this way. Or maybe I will write it all down on paper for him to read - that way I can really think about what it is I want to tell him and how I want to go about doing it.

Anyway, There is only one other therapist in town that takes my insurance so I'm hoping things might work out better with her.

Good luck to everyone else out there on this mental rollercoaster called life.

Jen