Okay.. Don't like to be touched!

[lurkings]

I have never understood this and hopefully I am not the only one. When it comes down to it I don't like being touched or comforted. I have no idea why! My cat will come and rub on my legs and I push him off because I don't want him to touch me.

One time I was really upset and a co-worker came up to me and was saying it was alright and went to rub my back and I told her sternly, "Don't touch me!" She said, "Okay.. Don't like to be touched." When my grandfather died my mom was upset and was hugging me, I remember feeling annoyed that she didn't ask first. I just stood there emotionless with my arms at my side. I didn't even hug her back. I work with kids and touching is a big part of my job... I don't like the kids to give me hugs! I do give them and comfort them as much as I possible can but I just want them off of me. A lot of times I just let them sit on me and hug on me because they need it but then when I go home I go straight to my room and don't talk to anyone, then they get offended, but atleast I am alone with myself and my 5 fishies and 20 something snails.

I don't understand why... Why??? Does anyone else feel like this?

[Lilya]

Lurkings,

I think people are either physical or not and it´s not unnatural to feel like you feel. I know a lot of healthy people who are just not into hugs or touch. I like to touch and be touched up to a certain degree, and it also depends on my moods. After difficult rejections, I cannot bearto be touched. When I feel content, I like it.

The important thing is to be true to yourself and set clear limits without offending. You seem to be able to do that. What I find difficult is when people walk into my zone of distance. They come near, and I go backwards, but they just invade my territory! I have real problems with that one.

Use adversity

[Weasel4IR]

Hey there lurkings,
I have sorta the same problem, my parents never were huggy people and sometimes I don't react well myself to being touched. My 4 dogs on the other hand I will let them walk, step, play and snuggle with me all they want and oh yea my husband too! lol

Don't worry just because you don't like being touched does not mean you have something wrong with you, you are you and I would maybe work on the confrontation part, I have that problem too, see there you got a buddy in this, lol

You take care, hugs,
Penelope

[lurkings]

~Weasel~
Hey! Well, I started therapy in December... Way after that question was posted... I have figured out for me what that is... I was abused and it comes back to that. I am glad that I am not the only one doesn't like touch though, doesn't make me feel like such and outsider. Even though I know what the issue is it doesn't always help me with it. I still don't like it unless it is on my terms...

Cool, thanks for responding. I was just thinking about it today!


~Lurkings

[Weasel4IR]

Hiya lurkings,
Glad to hear that you are getting some assistance with this, that will always help. I have nothing but faith in the therapy system, been many times myself, lol

I am so sorry to hear that you were abused, I just don't understand why people do that to other people, leaves me wondering sometimes what the heck is wrong with some people that want to hurt someone else.

I am just a sweet (at least I like to think so anyway) easy going person! Never feel like an outsider, you always have us here at SR and I will be sticking around for a long time, I love this site!

You take care, and many big hugs to you!
Penelope