I need feedback...

[littlefish]

I am a conservator and guardian for a mentally ill brother who lives in the US. I don't live there and this situation has been problematic.

I agreed in the court proceedings in 2006 that I would find proxy Guardians for my brother due to my living abroad but the first two quit because they did not feel qualified to care for a double diagnose: my brother is also a chronic alcoholic.

I have struggled with my own alcoholism during all of this and became sober one year ago, but have had relapses and my own condition is fragile.

So I find myself dealing with this situation while struggling to hold my own sobriety. I booked my tickets yesterday and feel hugely stressed about this.

For anyone on this particular forum related to mental health, I have some questions.

It is my understanding that only a court will decide institutionalizing. Is this the case? Or, can I as a C/G have my brother committed to a mental institution? I don't really want to do that, but he is in such a bad state of self neglect, I really wonder if he needs that.

The county Adult Protective services has had a lot of contact with him during the last 6 years, he has been an on and off client. He has also been assigned to a private agency that had care for him for about a year. They chose a very inappropriate care program for him so I took over the C/G 3 years ago. During this time another brother took care of him for a year but was unable to continue the care due to his own health problems. And he is an alcoholic too.

Essentially it has come to an impossible situation where my mentally ill brother has had his VA check withdrawn because he was not complying with basic requirements such as having a phone.

Well, I am really stressing about this and would appreciate any advice I can get about this.

Oh, and I also have a qeustion about intervention. Does anyone have any experience with this?

[Bamboozle]

Originally Posted by littlefish

It is my understanding that only a court will decide institutionalizing. Is this the case? Or, can I as a C/G have my brother committed to a mental institution? I don't really want to do that, but he is in such a bad state of self neglect, I really wonder if he needs that.

(((littlefish)))


Can you talk to a social worker, some kind of case worker, or even a lawyer in the state he's living in?

I don't know much about this...


I know that for involuntary commitment it does have to go through the legal process...but I'm not sure how it would work in your case.

[Faerie]

Littlefish,

I have no experience or advise to give but just want to send you my love and support.

You'll work this out.

Much love, as always,

Faerie,

[unholy_mess]

You are both a conservator AND a guardian? Do you know if you are full or partial guardian? I think laws vary somewhat by state, but to the best of my understanding, a full guardian has rights over basically all decisions regarding his well-being (including medical care, placement, finances, etc.). A partial guardian would have specific areas over which he/she would have control (such as just medical care). But I think the best thing to do would be to give the mental health center in the area and talk with a social worker/case worker or call a local lawyer. They'll be able to help give you specifics on what you can and cannot do for him.

[kwigers]

Originally Posted by littlefish

It is my understanding that only a court will decide institutionalizing. Is this the case? Or, can I as a C/G have my brother committed to a mental institution? I don't really want to do that, but he is in such a bad state of self neglect, I really wonder if he needs that.

In Wisconsin, (not sure about the other states) you would have to have a court make a decision based on everything you can find for evidence that your brother needs to be institutionalized. The records of contact with police, social services, etc will all be something you will want and need to present to the courts. It is not easy in this state, but it is doable. Depending on the situation.
Interventions can work sometimes and sometimes they do not work. There are so many parts to an intervention, your brother, you, any other family or friends, the interventionalist, ect... No one ever knows the outcome ahead of time. As with most things in life...
Are you getting the support you need? My suggestion is for you to be compassionate with yourself and be sure to take time for self care and some time to practice some spiritual connectedness if it works for you.
Much love and light!
~cheryl