blah!

[unholy_mess]

I started seeing a new therapist...and it's like trying to reopen everything all again. Has anyone else ever gone through this (I'm sure you have)? How do you deal with having to re-open all the wounds, yet again? How do you cope with the difficulty and not let the pain of trying to reopen yourself interfere with the actual opening of yourself?

[Astro]

I went through a few therapists before I found the right one, and then that one told me to quit wasting his time and my money, and just go to AA where he knew I was happy.

Opening, re-opening, peeling back another layer, those are what recovery is all about for me. I'm here to discover what led me to my addictions, and while it's painful at times, the end result is freedom from the bondage of my past.

[Bamboozle]

Sorry, UM. I don't have that problem at the moment...so far my therapist is working out. I thought about how I'd handle it...I'm sure it wouldn't be easy.

Can you see if your former therapist is willing to communicate with your current therapist so the transition will be smoother?

Make sure you tell your current therapist about your feelings concerning this. He/she will probably help you to get through it.

[ClayTheScribe]

Originally Posted by unholy_mess

I started seeing a new therapist...and it's like trying to reopen everything all again. Has anyone else ever gone through this (I'm sure you have)? How do you deal with having to re-open all the wounds, yet again? How do you cope with the difficulty and not let the pain of trying to reopen yourself interfere with the actual opening of yourself?

Most therapists will let you sign a privacy disclosure agreement so the former can talk with the new and get a better sense of where you're at. Sharing where I've been has been liberating for more and just remind yourself that your therapist can only do you good if you give her/him all the facts. It's kind of like tearing off a band-aid: you just have to get it out of your system. But usually therapists want to know where you are now, so if you can, only reveal facts of your past as they relate to where you are today. It also might help to write it all down and give it your therapist then have to speak it out loud. Also, discuss with your therapist how painful it is for you to tell what's happened and they can help you deal with that better.

Good luck

[readyforhelp]

Originally Posted by unholy_mess

I started seeing a new therapist...and it's like trying to reopen everything all again. Has anyone else ever gone through this (I'm sure you have)? How do you deal with having to re-open all the wounds, yet again? How do you cope with the difficulty and not let the pain of trying to reopen yourself interfere with the actual opening of yourself?

I JUST experienced this! Saturday. I met with my new therapist. It was disturbing and cleansing, I think. I was asked questions I did not expect and ended up crying a bit. I can only think that the more we tell our stories, the less power they have. On the flip side, if you're inclined to give the stories power, then the more you tell them, the more power they'll have.

If you can find empathy for yourself, that is key. Most of us do the best that we know how at any given time. That's it.

"How do you cope with the difficulty and not let the pain of trying to reopen yourself interfere with the actual opening of yourself?" I just figure that my story is many people's story, in some way or another, and the more I share, the less burden I will have to carry. I have to have faith in that and know that they (therapists) have the skills that can help me overcome. And, sometimes just talking about it gives me the skills I need. Most of us have "something."

Plus, a good therapist already has hair on her chest. So, not being ashamed and just owning it really helps. I know that takes a while to do, I've been in therapy for a while. Things happen the way they are supposed to, right? We are placed where we need to be to learn the lessons we need to learn, and that's it.

Not sure how much this will help you, but I had to respond because I just experienced this. I was so worried about it before the meeting but now I am re-inspired and have faith that it's all gonna be okay. I wish that for you, too.

[Zencat]

Where I'm at and with the help that is available to me therapist come and go. That can be true even with the psychiatrist. The local Mental Health Department (MHD) is constantly shifting care givers around on top of the care givers that seem to come and go on a regular basis. It is madding to have to start my story over from the beginning with each new therapist.

Its just as well because the type of traumatic illness I need to work through is not the specialty of the therapist that are hired at Mental Health. I was told by my Psych Dr. that I needed psychoanalysis and what is offered at the MHD is CBT. CBT is good for for a lot but not much good for deep rooted disorders that develop in childhood. And the type of care I get is state and government funded so its been difficult to find a psychoanalyst that takes the health coverage that I have.

[unholy_mess]

Thanks for your responses, guys! Just hearing that others have been where I've been/am makes it a little bit easier to talk because it helps me realize that she's probably heard this kind of stuff before and even though it's hard for me to talk about, I can kinda let go of the fears of judgment or shocking her. Which helps!
I saw her yesterday and we started approaching some of the painful stuff...which was, well, painful. But afterwards, I kind of felt less lonely like I now have someone to share the really bad, scary stuff with...the stuff I can't/am too scared to tell my friends.
She practices both CBT and psychodynamic therapy...she says she uses what's necessary at the time it's necessary. But we examine a lot of relationships and patterns of behavior from waaaay back so we're currently working the psychodynamic path.

[ClayTheScribe]

You're not likely to shock a trained professional, especially if they've been around awhile. You can pretty much assume they've dealt with people with more disturbing/shocking problems than you. It does feel good to not feel alone, that you don't have to keep it all bottled up. It might also help you to keep a journal or (private) blog too just to get it out there. I think psychodynamic can be helpful if what happened to you in the past is related to today but Freudianism is a practice that's fading. Be careful about mulling around the past too much 'cause you can get stuck there and lose sight of how to move forward. It's good she does CBT too.

Good luck

[ClayTheScribe]

I'd also add that simple breathing exercises can help get you to sleep. Some nights I just lie there, breathe in through my nose for three seconds, hold it for three seconds and then breathe out, and I do this for several minutes until I feel relaxed. Also, and this is going to sound silly but it works everytime, when you're lying there trying to get to sleep, smile. I thought my dad was nuts when he suggested it, but it works every time. If you're having trouble staying asleep you might want to get Lunesta or Ambien.

[BlueMoon]

i recently RE-started with the same therapist after a few months off and I am surprised at how hard it is! I had thought it'd be easy to slip back in where I was. Maybe starting is always hard at the beginning? Hang in there!

[sct]

Most therapists will let you sign a privacy disclosure agreement so the former can talk with the new and get a better sense of where you're at. Sharing where I've been has been liberating for more and just remind yourself that your therapist can only do you good if you give her/him all the facts. It's kind of like tearing off a band-aid: you just have to get it out of your system. But usually therapists want to know where you are now, so if you can, only reveal facts of your past as they relate to where you are today. It also might help to write it all down and give it your therapist then have to speak it out loud. Also, discuss with your therapist how painful it is for you to tell what's happened and they can help you deal with that better.

Good idea. I'm looking at starting work with a new therapist. I might write something up ahead of time. It's very likely that our first session will be silent anyway... it takes me a while to warm up to talking. But writing it up in advance will save time.

[hauntedbyjmb]

This past Thursday I started with a new person after 8 years with the same lady. It was hard for me since A. does not know I hate her new person.
Sorry, this is "Q" named Monique and I am suppose to tell everyone when I am out, A. is asleep and I am using her body, GOD HELP ME, her body is terrible, Sorry I am not happy in here but it is where I am right now.
The new lady does not know me and I just learned how to manipulate the other lady. A. told me I can see Marsha on planned visits. Again, this is Monique, I go by "Q" and I have been out more now that we do not have Beth to go talk to.
Good luck everyone who has to change the people they go talk to. Beth was nice, she even got me a cool scarf for Christmas. I need to go to sleep and let A's body rest. "Q"

[historyteach]

Funny, I just started with a new T and it's with new issues. I told her to talk with my old T freely. I never thought twice about it. It seemed natural to me. Before my issues were depression and anxiety; today, it's simply anxiety over my job issue. (And a probably ADHD issue that's been LONG overdue.) Nonetheless, I never thought twice about asking / telling her to look at my record or speak to my previous counselor for any information that may be helpful in *this* instance. I'm there for help today. Whatever might help, I'm game for.

Shalom!

[discontentmiser]

since I was 10 I seeked mental health help in one way and another and, until last fall, was told that I was perfectly normal simply because I did well at school!

Then, after a depressive episode, was (I thought) sent to a psysch. therapy association but somehow ended up with a pediatrician.
she was extremely unhelpful, and stated repeatedly that the local children's hospital wouldn't even consider looking at a 16 year old.
After going to emerg. the same hospital she said would reject me took me in for assessment.

I explained it all to the lady in emerg. ; the multitude of doctors, OT specialist, etc. didn't bother reading her (each other's) report(s) and I got sick of repeating my story for the umpteenth time
needless to say, I was dissappointed by the lack of communication.

now I'm at the point where all these old fears(terrors), etc. are surfacing, with old wounds (never healed)

then yesterday in my daily reader it mentioned looking at the past without staring;

nice concept, but I feel like I have this hurdle/roadblock of these fears which I have to share with a close alanon friend before I can move on. she's gone,
so I might have to talk to my therapist (a guy, ugh)

[hauntedbyjmb]

HUGS ((((DISCO)))) I agree and my ALANON readings always are a challenge to me to. And being in the middle of a transistion with T's too makes it even harder. Anytime you want to vent about the readings please give me a message. This stuff is even harder to deal with when you have mental health issues. And, when you score high on IQ tests and do well in school, they pass you by as far as help goes for mental health issues.
BUT WE SHALL RECOVER FROM OUR CHILDHOODS and one day at a time we will beat the system that tried to beat us!
Have a great day!