buggin the bleep out!!!

[candystripper]

Hey guys how are things ?
I have been haven trouble again . I started going to meetings and I'm getting even more paranoid too many people and thoughts. Scary horror story and guy stuff sad i know but it is what it is. Still attending the out paitent rehab program and still clean it will be 90 days on the 31st. What do you do when you think there's a conspiracy and everyone you ask to confirm that its non sense you don't believe anyway
? Its so awful I don't trust people when i think i should and i do when i should not. Any one got some inside info let me know!!!

[jurneyman]

Hi Candy, Good news on the almost 90 days, keep the momentum going. When I went through a paranoid period the last time, I was able to at least tone it down, by doing
a very in depth Fear based ego deflating 4th and 5th step, I had to find and openly admit what I was hiding, or in denial about that would cause me to be afraid and why.

Lamictal was also added to my anti-d, How it seemed to help was working on a certain level of my depression, It removed some of the anxiety of not being able to function, and taking care of even just the basics like paying my bills ect. In actuality, besides working the 4th and 5th steps that relieved me of the fears I no longer should have worried about but did, but what I found interesting was the basis for part of my anxiety was my depression

I am still on both meds, but my Pdoc is still trying to get the dosages dialed in. What I learned when I was in the V.A. for PTSD also helped me to take into consideration, how the drugs and alcohol lowered my inhibitions, and there wasn't very much that could scare me. Without them I was afraid of almost everything, and had to work on finding a balance just like everything else I have had to change in recovery. Never quit, don't let it beat you.

[stone]

When I was paranoid there is no way I could have done a 4th and 5th step...to do so would have been a bad idea.

When I was paranoid my brain was making every stiutation into something false, unreal, it would spiral off into strands involving people and my life from years ago...clearly delusional and to bring real life into it would not work.

Jurneyman the steps are not for paranoia or mental health problems, they are for alcoholism and even that is debatable.

[jurneyman]

Stone, What I posted here was a personal experience, and the steps I mentioned were
used to help me successfully find what was causing the fears that I thought were unfounded. The 4th and 5th steps that I mentioned were not from AA but from ACOA Alcoholic Children Of Alcoholics a different program that use the steps in a different way.
There are other forums on this site that have available to them and use the different forms of 12 step programs