working or not

[maximray]

About 6 mths ago I had a breakdown at work, now on 3 different meds. Feeling better except for working, dont have the desire to go. Anyone else have experience with this?

[Juls]

Hi maximray,

I had the same kind of thing happen, and it was awhile before I went back to work. In my case my dr. felt that the breakdown was due to stress from the job, and I was able to be on disablility for a year. If your able to take a little more time for yourself, then do it.

Can you tell us more about exactly what happened with you. do you feel it was work related, or something else, only if you feel like sharing.

Juls

[srepty]

I have had the same problem but it has been going on since 1988.
Here's my story......... In 1988 I became a supervisor for a Respiratory therapy department in a growing hospital. Well my boss turned out to be my mother in disguise. Nothing I did was ever good enough for him, I wasn't as nice, pretty or efficient as the 2nd shift supervisor. I was always lacking.
They have saidin therapy and in meetings that it is my old coping behaviors from my past that just don't work in my adualt life but by Lord for the life of me I still hate work. I drag myself in there but it doesn't excite or give me as much joy as it used to. I am so down and depressed most of the time especially at work that I don't know what to do, but luckily I am being able to make it.
I know that there is so much chaos and not enough good stuff going on in my life these days, and that doesn't help any. But I still seem to look for acceptance, love or approval in my work life and it sometimes just isn't there.
I don't know the answer to the question but I wish I did.
Lisa

[Juls]

Lisa,

Unfortunately, part of the answer is the we have to learn to give ourselves love and acceptance, and not look for it from others. Your boss is not your mother, although she may act like her.

Job burnout is a rough thing to deal with. For me when it has happened it means it's time to go to another job, however jobs are pretty scarce right not.

Have you read anything by Iyanla? When I was stuck in a certain place in my life, I used one of her books to help me get unstuck.

Juls

[maximray]

I used to really like my job. Somewhere between my breakdown in March and going back in June I have lost my enthusiasm for my job. I haven't been working steady. I was able to get the Family & Medical Leave Act for depression but time is running out. Your allowed 12 weeks, which is unpaid time. I was diagnosed Major Anxiety-Major Depression and Paranioa, all are under control with the meds now. All other areas of my life are going fine, friends, meetings, and relationship, work is a different story. Some of my friends say that I'm sick of my job and just don't want to go- that I'm sick of working. Dr. seems puzzled too, but continues to write Dr. excuses for me. A friend gave me the link to this message board...... hoping someone has a light at the end of my tunnel.

[HardHead]

There's always light at the end of the tunnel buddy, Just hang on fer the barrel ride is gonna suck. Ask gooch. lol
Good luck good to see ya here.

[Juls]

Maximray,

Some things just have no definitive answer to them, or at least not one we are able to see at the time. The main thing is what can you do about your situation. What can you do for you that would help make your job more tolerable, in the event that you are unable to change jobs.

Juls

[maximray]

Saw the Dr. yesterday, he doesn't think being off work any longer will benefit me. So it's back to work on Monday. Still no real desire to go but, I can accept the fact that I have to go.

[Gooch]

Originally posted by HardHead
There's always light at the end of the tunnel buddy, Just hang on fer the barrel ride is gonna suck. Ask gooch. lol
Good luck good to see ya here.

lol .... Yep some of the twists and turns in the barrel are bumpy and can leave a bruise. We all gets ta take a turn in it though and your experience livin through the ride can help anuther through their turn in it. Ask Hardhead . lol

[Lilya]

Hello Maxime and Lisa,

I have had two episodes in my life I didn´t want to work and couldn´t cope with it. In the former case my ex-husband had joined a cult and my daughter followed. The trauma was too much for me at the time. I forced myself though, but took care of going to meetings to get energy, doing something very nice for myself as a reward (not by abusing anything, though) and the flame slowly got back.

Second episode was also due to a really bad case of job burn-out. I also had an editor from hell (I´m a writer and publish regularily) who abused me in the worst possible way. I hired a lawyer and sued him and got myself another editor. After that I got so tired I lost all ambition and passion for work, which really replaces my lack of relationships (I´m in SLAA and celibate at the moment). It took 18 months for me to get back on my feet and feel passion for my work again.

I read a lot of books on burn-out - I´ll find some links for you later - and I started working as a sideline as a SOS operator which turned my life around. I also help ex-convicts to get back on their feet and counsel juvenile delinguents. All this is very giving, but don´t forget: You come first and have to be able to be good to yourself so you can give. Otherwise: Burn-out. Let me know how you´re doing.

About the boss from hell - try detaching and visulaizations. What works for me is imagining a person I dislike sitting opposite me. I say slowly in my mind: "I bless you, I release you, I let you go." Try using the colour purple when you visualize the person. If that does not work, try making changes in your work and try to stay out of her way. Nasty bosses can be hell to deal with, but remember, the solution is in you and your way of dealing with your emotions. Good luck.

Use adversity

[Lilya]

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[maximray]

Thanks Lilya,

Today was my first day back in over 3 weeks. Other than being a very long day, I work 5am to 3:30pm, it wasn't all that bad. I did hear about trying to make your job more fun although I really can't see how I can but I am willing to try. My ultimate goal is just to be somewhat content and able to keep up with the rest of the operation. I work 10hrs a day Mon. - Thur. it makes for a great weekend. Trying to also stay busy at home to, rather than just sitting around doing nothing. See ya'll tomorrow.......AFTER WORK......

Keepin' my head up and my feet movin'.

[Juls]

Ray,

I'm glad to hear your first day back at work went well. It's also great that you are open to trying to bring some fun into your job. Right now I'm enjoying my job. I am an esthetician (I do facial, waxing, body treatments, etc.), and I really like my clients. However I had a job that got to be really too much for me, and I ended up leaving that field and going on to something else.

Good luck, and keep us informed on what's going on there.

Juls

[maximray]

Didn't make work today(TUES.) Couldn't fall asleep last night, can't believe I wasn't tired, I had a very long day yesterday. I don't know what the problem is. Lots of pressure at work to keep up, which raises my anxiety level. The boss stands there with his clip board waiting to see if I finish on time. If I don't he'll be there to rag on me. Hope I can sleep tonight, I really need the money so I have to go to work.

[Juls]

It's stress Maximray. Do you know anything about relaxation. It helps to find a good tape, and at night when you go to bed, play it. After awhile, it starts getting easier to relax.

There's also a homeopathic remedy which helps me alot. It's called Calms Forte, and can be found in most health food stores.

Juls

[maximray]

Well, I thought everything else in my life was going good. My girlfriend broke up with me yesterday. She says we shouldn't see one another till I get my *#!*#!*#!*#! together. I don't understand her, this came out of the blue. I really don't need this now either. Didn't go to work again today, rather sad and feeling rejected. Hope some good comes from all this, getting tired of the bad.
Thank Juls for the suggestion about the tape, I do have one but haven't used it in a while. I will try it again.

[maximray]

Hey ya'll, I saw the DR. yesterday, and today. He wants me to go into the hospital. Been there done that, don't want to go back. Will be seeing him again tomorrow. I'm praying he won't commit me, that will be the straw that broke this camels back.

[Juls]

Maximray,

Why would going into the hospital again be so bad. Sometimes it can give us the break we need, give us the opportunity to adjust to meds, or get off drugs. I know it is not the pleasantest place to be, but it can be helpful.

Juls