off meds for pregnancy, very depressed - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

powerpuffgirl · 08-05-2003, 02:00 PM

ugh, i just need some support...and maybe some advice on how to get out of my own way.
About a month ago I went off my mood stabilizer (topomax) because i found out I was pregnant. I'm still on the Prozac, but I'm getting inctreasingly depressed. I keep hoping to bounce out of it, even if it means dealing with mania. But it's just getting worse, especially in teh last week. I also have mornign sickness, but I tell myself and my fiance it's worse than it is so that I'll have an excuse to lay down. I slept until 3pm today. i still want to go back to bed. It's hot and muggy out, so going for a walk makes me feel worse. I am getting married in a week and a half. I am a writer and had a book due last friday, it's not even half done yet. i just feel like sleeping to escape it all.
Three years ago, my cousin killed herself after going off her meds so that she could get pregnant. I'm not suicidal, but I know that this can progress. I am in a new area and don't have a therapist or shrink. And I know I need to do it, It's just so hard to get on the phone, to make those calls. Just thinking about it makes me want to sleep. And the worst part...I can't cry.
I pretty much know what you will say...but I need to hear it. As much as you've got.
Thank-You!
ppg

2stop · 08-05-2003, 02:05 PM

Bless your heart girl!~Yes, I definitely think you need a good therapist and talk to your doctor, I know how heavy that phone can be, and the thought alone weighs a ton. I came off my meds a month or so ago, was feeling worse on them, but I worry about the suicidal depression hitting again too, the past few days I have been starting to get more depressed. Both of my pregnancies I did real well without any antidepressant, but that was 8 and 10 years ago. Please make the phone calls to get yourself a support network, don't suffer alone through this. I am sending big hugs and love your way my dear..Hang in there okay?

Juls · 08-05-2003, 07:13 PM

PPG,

Get thee to a therapist. Call the Dr. Do it, do it now. O.K.?

It is really hard what you are going through. Pregnancy alone can make us feel pretty strange. I remember when I was pregnant I felt like I was living in another world. Also tired all the time, just wanted to sleep, sleep, sleep.

It is difficult when you have goals you have to meet, like the book being due, otherwise I would say rest as much as you want, need, feel.

I know how hard it is, but pick up the phone and make those goals. You need to do it for yourself and your baby.

I'm very sorry to hear about what happened with your cousin. That's pretty scary. It's good your not feeling suicidal now, and that you know that it can progress, but knowing it won't help if you don't take action.

Make the calls, and let us know what happens.

Juls

powerpuffgirl · 08-06-2003, 08:38 AM

I did it! They have to call me back, but I made the calls! it took 4 tries to get a place that answered the phone, but I made it! I haven't gone back to sleep yet today, either. thank you so much for your support!
Oh- I have a bipolar friend who told me about fish oil as a natural mood stabilizer (said her psychiatrist reccomended it). I have been taking it, and sometimes forgetting it. When i take it, I feel a little better the next day. Has anyone else used fish oil for this? Just curious

ppg

Juls · 08-06-2003, 01:49 PM

Power,

I'm really happy to hear you made the phone calls. You made a big step for yourself, and I hope it makes you feel proud of yourself. Any step we make in the right direction is a step towards health.

I have never heard about the fish oil, but it won't hurt you, it's good for you, and if it can help with mood stabilization, then that would be great.

Juls

powerpuffgirl · 08-06-2003, 01:58 PM

I have an appointment for intake in two weeks. It's not as soon as it could be, but you know - just MAKING the call has really helped, and now I'm at least in their system so if I have an emergency I'm not just calling cold, you know? I only laid down for 1/2 hour today, and then I read my online pregnancy calendar and it said how much the baby has grown lately, so I don't feel quite as bad about my sleeping because i know my body is working hard.
Thanks for your support, everyone. These boards feel so safe for me, I'm so grateful.
PPG

2stop · 08-07-2003, 10:20 AM

Good Morning PowerPuffGirl!!~ How are you feeling today?~

powerpuffgirl · 08-07-2003, 10:54 AM

Thanks for asking... Actually, today is really bad. I slept until past noon, and that's after getting my daughter to daycare. Thank god my partner is understanding, he accepts this better than I do. I feel like such a lump.
This too shall pass?
I keep waiting for the mania...at least I could get something done! The house is a mess...
This too shall pass, please?
thanks, 2stop, I appreciate the note. So much.
-Lu

2stop · 08-07-2003, 11:08 AM

Oh girl I hear ya with saying this Too Shall pass over and over...Funny you mentioned wishing the mania would hit!!~Not 5 minutes ago I was sitting here thinking..hmmmmm..I could take some ephedrine and maybe feel a little manic~get the house cleaned, etc etc...

I am not going to though, I get so mean on that stuff, I don't even want to be around me!!! Maybe you could try some relaxing and some meditation? I usually resist this too, C'mon just getting Tammie, don't shut your eyes and relax..GO! GO! GO!~~ Just driving myself insane, but when I do work on relaxing I find I have more energy, I hope your day gets better for you, I have you in my thoughts and prayers!!!

C'mon! I'll take ya to lunch~~

Juls · 08-08-2003, 08:13 PM

Power,

Don't get too down on yourself, what your feeling is normal. At least you did get your daughter off to daycare. There were some days for me when I didn't even get that far.

As long as some of the basics are covered, i.e. kids fed, then give yourself a break. It's great that you have an understanding partner.

Juls

powerpuffgirl · 08-09-2003, 06:33 PM

thank you, I t's good to get some perspective.
I'm feeling insecure, like I'm wearing my partner down...I feel so crappy sometimes, it's alot of stress on our relationship. Or at least i'm afraid it is, he hasn't said so. Oh, silly me.
I just feel bad that I'm not participating in our new family how I want to!
I hope i'm not sick on our wedding day...(less then a week away now!)

Juls · 08-09-2003, 08:25 PM

PPG,

Please go easy on yourself. Worrying never helped anything. If you feel sick on your wedding day, it's o.k. Just do the best you can. Alot of the pressure we feel about things we put on ourselves. Your partner sounds like he's very understanding. You are the one pregnant and dealing with your emotions. You need a break. You don't have to apologize for feeling bad, or not being able to accomplish what you want.

Things will get better, and when you look back you'll wonder why you made it so hard on yourself. You don't need to. Relax and try to enjoy what you can of your pregnancy.

Juls

08-05-2003, 02:00 PM	#1 (permalink)
powerpuffgirl Paused Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 51	off meds for pregnancy, very depressed ugh, i just need some support...and maybe some advice on how to get out of my own way. About a month ago I went off my mood stabilizer (topomax) because i found out I was pregnant. I'm still on the Prozac, but I'm getting inctreasingly depressed. I keep hoping to bounce out of it, even if it means dealing with mania. But it's just getting worse, especially in teh last week. I also have mornign sickness, but I tell myself and my fiance it's worse than it is so that I'll have an excuse to lay down. I slept until 3pm today. i still want to go back to bed. It's hot and muggy out, so going for a walk makes me feel worse. I am getting married in a week and a half. I am a writer and had a book due last friday, it's not even half done yet. i just feel like sleeping to escape it all. Three years ago, my cousin killed herself after going off her meds so that she could get pregnant. I'm not suicidal, but I know that this can progress. I am in a new area and don't have a therapist or shrink. And I know I need to do it, It's just so hard to get on the phone, to make those calls. Just thinking about it makes me want to sleep. And the worst part...I can't cry. I pretty much know what you will say...but I need to hear it. As much as you've got. Thank-You! ppg

08-05-2003, 02:05 PM	#2 (permalink)
2stop ~Author of My Life~ Join Date: May 2003 Location: Doing what I thought I couldn't.... Posts: 4,669	Bless your heart girl!~Yes, I definitely think you need a good therapist and talk to your doctor, I know how heavy that phone can be, and the thought alone weighs a ton. I came off my meds a month or so ago, was feeling worse on them, but I worry about the suicidal depression hitting again too, the past few days I have been starting to get more depressed. Both of my pregnancies I did real well without any antidepressant, but that was 8 and 10 years ago. Please make the phone calls to get yourself a support network, don't suffer alone through this. I am sending big hugs and love your way my dear..Hang in there okay? __________________ Many Hugs and Hope too, Tammie "Think of all the beauty still left around you and BE HAPPY." ~Anne Frank~ "Things do not change, WE change." ~Henry David Thoreau~

08-05-2003, 07:13 PM	#3 (permalink)
Juls Member Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: California, USA Posts: 1,101	PPG, Get thee to a therapist. Call the Dr. Do it, do it now. O.K.? It is really hard what you are going through. Pregnancy alone can make us feel pretty strange. I remember when I was pregnant I felt like I was living in another world. Also tired all the time, just wanted to sleep, sleep, sleep. It is difficult when you have goals you have to meet, like the book being due, otherwise I would say rest as much as you want, need, feel. I know how hard it is, but pick up the phone and make those goals. You need to do it for yourself and your baby. I'm very sorry to hear about what happened with your cousin. That's pretty scary. It's good your not feeling suicidal now, and that you know that it can progress, but knowing it won't help if you don't take action. Make the calls, and let us know what happens. Juls __________________ Think World Peace

08-06-2003, 01:49 PM	#5 (permalink)
Juls Member Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: California, USA Posts: 1,101	Power, I'm really happy to hear you made the phone calls. You made a big step for yourself, and I hope it makes you feel proud of yourself. Any step we make in the right direction is a step towards health. I have never heard about the fish oil, but it won't hurt you, it's good for you, and if it can help with mood stabilization, then that would be great. Juls __________________ Think World Peace

08-07-2003, 10:20 AM	#7 (permalink)
2stop ~Author of My Life~ Join Date: May 2003 Location: Doing what I thought I couldn't.... Posts: 4,669	Good Morning PowerPuffGirl!!~ How are you feeling today?~ __________________ Many Hugs and Hope too, Tammie "Think of all the beauty still left around you and BE HAPPY." ~Anne Frank~ "Things do not change, WE change." ~Henry David Thoreau~

08-06-2003, 08:38 AM	#4 (permalink)
powerpuffgirl Paused Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 51	I did it! They have to call me back, but I made the calls! it took 4 tries to get a place that answered the phone, but I made it! I haven't gone back to sleep yet today, either. thank you so much for your support! Oh- I have a bipolar friend who told me about fish oil as a natural mood stabilizer (said her psychiatrist reccomended it). I have been taking it, and sometimes forgetting it. When i take it, I feel a little better the next day. Has anyone else used fish oil for this? Just curious ppg

08-06-2003, 01:58 PM	#6 (permalink)
powerpuffgirl Paused Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 51	I have an appointment for intake in two weeks. It's not as soon as it could be, but you know - just MAKING the call has really helped, and now I'm at least in their system so if I have an emergency I'm not just calling cold, you know? I only laid down for 1/2 hour today, and then I read my online pregnancy calendar and it said how much the baby has grown lately, so I don't feel quite as bad about my sleeping because i know my body is working hard. Thanks for your support, everyone. These boards feel so safe for me, I'm so grateful. PPG

08-07-2003, 10:54 AM	#8 (permalink)
powerpuffgirl Paused Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 51	Thanks for asking... Actually, today is really bad. I slept until past noon, and that's after getting my daughter to daycare. Thank god my partner is understanding, he accepts this better than I do. I feel like such a lump. This too shall pass? I keep waiting for the mania...at least I could get something done! The house is a mess... This too shall pass, please? thanks, 2stop, I appreciate the note. So much. -Lu

08-07-2003, 11:08 AM	#9 (permalink)
2stop ~Author of My Life~ Join Date: May 2003 Location: Doing what I thought I couldn't.... Posts: 4,669	Oh girl I hear ya with saying this Too Shall pass over and over...Funny you mentioned wishing the mania would hit!!~Not 5 minutes ago I was sitting here thinking..hmmmmm..I could take some ephedrine and maybe feel a little manic~get the house cleaned, etc etc... I am not going to though, I get so mean on that stuff, I don't even want to be around me!!! Maybe you could try some relaxing and some meditation? I usually resist this too, C'mon just getting Tammie, don't shut your eyes and relax..GO! GO! GO!~~ Just driving myself insane, but when I do work on relaxing I find I have more energy, I hope your day gets better for you, I have you in my thoughts and prayers!!! C'mon! I'll take ya to lunch~~ Attached Images __________________ Many Hugs and Hope too, Tammie "Think of all the beauty still left around you and BE HAPPY." ~Anne Frank~ "Things do not change, WE change." ~Henry David Thoreau~

08-08-2003, 08:13 PM	#10 (permalink)
Juls Member Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: California, USA Posts: 1,101	Power, Don't get too down on yourself, what your feeling is normal. At least you did get your daughter off to daycare. There were some days for me when I didn't even get that far. As long as some of the basics are covered, i.e. kids fed, then give yourself a break. It's great that you have an understanding partner. Juls __________________ Think World Peace

08-09-2003, 06:33 PM	#11 (permalink)
powerpuffgirl Paused Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 51	thank you, I t's good to get some perspective. I'm feeling insecure, like I'm wearing my partner down...I feel so crappy sometimes, it's alot of stress on our relationship. Or at least i'm afraid it is, he hasn't said so. Oh, silly me. I just feel bad that I'm not participating in our new family how I want to! I hope i'm not sick on our wedding day...(less then a week away now!)

08-09-2003, 08:25 PM	#12 (permalink)
Juls Member Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: California, USA Posts: 1,101	PPG, Please go easy on yourself. Worrying never helped anything. If you feel sick on your wedding day, it's o.k. Just do the best you can. Alot of the pressure we feel about things we put on ourselves. Your partner sounds like he's very understanding. You are the one pregnant and dealing with your emotions. You need a break. You don't have to apologize for feeling bad, or not being able to accomplish what you want. Things will get better, and when you look back you'll wonder why you made it so hard on yourself. You don't need to. Relax and try to enjoy what you can of your pregnancy. Juls __________________ Think World Peace

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