Is your past substance abuse keeping you from getting the meds you need?

[scott]

Sometimes I feel like I have to try a ton of other meds INSTEAD of the med I need because of my history of substance abuse. No matter how much I try to tell them that that part of my life is behind me they still make me go through weeks and weeks of trying out meds that only half-ass work instead of putting me on the meds I probably need because they're controlled. I even have someone to lock up my meds in a safe that I have no idea what the unlock code is and someone to hand out my meds to me. If the dumb doctors would have caught the ADHD/bipolar way back when, perhaps I wouldn't have abused drugs in order to cope with what I didn't understand. Because I guarantee you that if I knew what this was going to be like getting out of hand with the bipolar and adhd I never would have EVER put a single pill in my mouth. I just got off an allergic reaction to strattera last night for my ADHD and they refuse to prescribe stimulants to me. Then, they say because of the ADHD I have severe anxiety, agitation, irritability, in the afternoons and evenings of which they will give me nothing short of benadryl for the anxiety that makes my B/P skyrocket to 159/98 with a P-118 resting.

I don't know, sometimes it just doesn't seem fair what they make me go through while anybody else could just go get the drugs right off the bat. Sometimes I wonder if I did the right thing telling these psychiatrists about my history of drug abuse.

I think that's all for my soapbox right now, I'll step down.

[mxchaos]

I've been in your shoes luckily my new doc doesn't use my addiction against me. In the mean time have you thought about going to DBT therapy to learn skills to reduce your anxiety?

[scott]

Originally Posted by mxchaos

I've been in your shoes luckily my new doc doesn't use my addiction against me. In the mean time have you thought about going to DBT therapy to learn skills to reduce your anxiety?

What is "DBT therapy"? I've already made an attempt at scheduling a therapy appointment with the mental health clinic I've been going to but haven't heard back from the case manager yet. Is DBT therapy like cognitive and behavior therapy cause I'm currently reading a book on it called "Feel Good" by David Burns M.D. and so far it's a pretty enlightening book.

[paisleydreams]

i can't get the meds i need for migraine due to drug abuse history. i may be rationalizing.... but the "history" was a 6mth stint when i got overloaded with memories from some very bad counselors. well documented. in 1994. no drug seeking behavior before that, or since, no hospitalizations -for anything. still no migraine meds. with the computerization of records now, i wonder if i will ever 'escape' 1994.

[mxchaos]

Yeah DBT is some what like CBT, Marsha Linehan has some books on how to do it or you could just google it. CBT and DBT teach you skills to live healthy.

[scott]

Originally Posted by mxchaos

Yeah DBT is some what like CBT, Marsha Linehan has some books on how to do it or you could just google it. CBT and DBT teach you skills to live healthy.

Thanks, I am looking at giving this a try as I will do anything right now (except go pop some pills) in order to feel better.

[stainedglass]

Well I know medical advice isn't tolerated here. But can I suggest vitamins? Guess I'll find out...

* B vitamins - Biotin, niacin (100mg per day), thiamine, pantothenic acid, riboflavin, B6 (100mg per day), B12, folic acid are all important for the production of the key chemical messengers in the brain called neurotransmitters. Thiamine is very important for those prone to panic, anxiety and depression. Every time you become angry, cry or feel run down - you are burning thiamine. A daily B-Complex (50 to 100mg per day) supplement is a great way of getting the B vitamins your body needs.

* Tryptophan is a calming agent, which also helps bolster the nervous system.

* Calcium (600mg + Vit. D per day) is a muscle relaxant. It helps calm you down during an anxious period. Vitamin D allows your body to absorb Calcium properly.

* Alpha-linolenic acid There have been quite a few studies that have focused on alpha-linolenic acid and anxiety disorder. A good percentage of individuals suffering from panic attacks for a decade have reported back a significant improvement within 2-3 months of consuming additional amounts of alpha-linolenic acid.

* Magnesium (200mg 2 to 3 times per day) may be beneficial during anxiety and panic because it assists with muscle relaxation.

* Vitamin C (250 to 500mg per day) reduces swelling and helps your immune system function better.

* Coenzyme Q10 (50 to 100mg one to two times per day) improves oxygen delivery to tissues and has antioxidant activity.

Depending on your symptoms and their severity, the above list can be used as a guideline of vitamins that you can consider adding to your diet. The vitamins listed above should be used in conjunction with your other medications.

[MROBI]

keep looking for the right doctor to get what you need, drug abuse history be-damned. it might take a while and it doesnt go as fast as it should but dont give up. it took me 3-4 years to get to the 2 doctors who work hand in hand at treating me. they are simply amazing and have changed my life with the right meds for me. they are actually bewildered about my improvement on some unlikely meds and say i am a very unusual case. 1 out of hundreds who reacted positive on these meds. i had to have alot of patients to get this far and at times i felt like just a # but they really cared about me.

you know there are doctors and then there are great dr.'s and i have been let down alot. dont give up the next dr. could be the right one for you. i recomend going to the best facility you can find like a teaching hospital or something and do your research and be your own advocate.

[justanothrdrunk]

I might probably do much better with my anxiety with some benzos, but I don't really want to find out.

I'm on Effexor for dperession and anxiety. It seems to handle the depression okay, but doesn't seem to do squat for my anxiety.

I've never really thought about how maybe if I wasn't an addict I could just go on another pill and be better. It is what it is, I don't know. Never thought about it.

[Bozo]

a couple of years ago I stumbled on a med called tramadol. it relieved my anxiety, depression and i had a desire to do things again, and was able to focus on the task at hand.

Anyways, years ago i told one doctor that I am a recovering alcoholic and now that information is known i guess to all doctors due to computers and such.

i asked my doctor, as a matter of fact, quite a few doctors to treat my depression with tramadol, and they wont touch it. even if my wife went and vouched she would dispense the medicine to me as prescribed.

Go figure.

[historyteach]

(((Bozo)))

Long time no see!!!
How are ya?
What's new and where have ya been?
We've missed you, ya know?

Hope to hear from you and hear how things have been.
Don't stay away so long, ok?

Shalom!

[mle-sober]

Originally Posted by sschriever

Sometimes I feel like I have to try a ton of other meds INSTEAD of the med I need because of my history of substance abuse. No matter how much I try to tell them that that part of my life is behind me they still make me go through weeks and weeks of trying out meds that only half-ass work instead of putting me on the meds I probably need because they're controlled. I even have someone to lock up my meds in a safe that I have no idea what the unlock code is and someone to hand out my meds to me. If the dumb doctors would have caught the ADHD/bipolar way back when, perhaps I wouldn't have abused drugs in order to cope with what I didn't understand. Because I guarantee you that if I knew what this was going to be like getting out of hand with the bipolar and adhd I never would have EVER put a single pill in my mouth. I just got off an allergic reaction to strattera last night for my ADHD and they refuse to prescribe stimulants to me. Then, they say because of the ADHD I have severe anxiety, agitation, irritability, in the afternoons and evenings of which they will give me nothing short of benadryl for the anxiety that makes my B/P skyrocket to 159/98 with a P-118 resting.

I don't know, sometimes it just doesn't seem fair what they make me go through while anybody else could just go get the drugs right off the bat. Sometimes I wonder if I did the right thing telling these psychiatrists about my history of drug abuse.

I think that's all for my soapbox right now, I'll step down.

What meds do you feel you need that you aren't getting? Benzos?

[scott]

Originally Posted by mle-sober

What meds do you feel you need that you aren't getting? Benzos?

No, I guess it's not just the meds as I have suggested taking something other than the stimulant-like antidepressant I was being given that made me feel even more crazy than before I went. I just feel like that, with my current doctor who I recently fired, I am labeled as this piece of trash drug addict who is wanting nothing but more happy pills EVERY single time he shows up in my office. I am tired of being treated like this by health professionals. I know they probably get conned by drug seekers quite a bit but I try to tell them that I am different and that I just want to get better only to be talked down to and looked at funny and keep getting told it's just the drugs talking, or you're just experiencing cravings for more drugs. What I am experiencing is a want and desire to be healthy. I want to be free from the reason I used prescription drugs in the first place. I want to be normal when I go out into public, without starting to sweat profusely, my heart pounding, and starting to feel light headed. I'm tired of having flashbacks to the sexual abuse when I was 7. I'm tired of having mood swings all the time, from waking up with nightmares 5 times a week. I'm tired. I'm finally doing what is the right thing and seeking medical help for my problems only the medical professionals I've seen don't seem to care or want to help me which is a very sad thing to say about people who have taken an oath to help people. I don't know what drugs I need or what therapies to have but when I ask about them and what I'm taking I don't want to be labeled a drug seeker. I want to be a patient, with needs, who is asking for help, someone whom you would want to do something to help me in any way possible. I'm tired of this label as a "drug addict or seeker" getting in the way of me getting healthy. It's absolutely preposterous. I could go on and on but I think it's time to get off my soap box now. Thank you for asking that question because it gave me a chance to vent a little. Do not think this is rude towards you mle as you have been wonderful council for me in my troubling times and I am very grateful for your insight.

[mle-sober]

I think what I would do is try to find a doctor I was comfortable with and from there, think of myself as working with them for the long-haul. I would try to put out of my mind what they may or may not think about me and how they may or may not label me. In all liklihood, not all the docs are judging you so harshly. I wonder if it's not more that you are hearing your own self incriminating judgements in your head? I know it can be really hard - I empathize with you in many ways and on many levels. But even most doctors won't think of people currently addicted as "pieces of trash."

I'm not trying to belittle your feelings. I'm just trying to encourage you to put your thoughts about what others think about you aside. Particularly what your doctors think about you. You are working hard to find real health. And what matters is what you think of yourself, working consistently with your healthcare professionals, staying clean and sober, and slowly making progress by taking the next right step.

I don't mind venting. It's healthy! ( :

[historyteach]

Scott,
Perhaps it's time to ask your doc for a name of a psychiatrist.
That's the one who will take the time to listen to the facts of you being tired because you

sweat profusely, my heart pounding, and starting to feel light headed. I'm tired of having flashbacks to the sexual abuse when I was 7. I'm tired of having mood swings all the time, from waking up with nightmares 5 times a week. I'm tired.

A good shrink can and will make sense of you wanting to be free from the reason you used prescription drugs in the first place.

Why not give it a try? IT can't hurt, can it?

Shalom!

[mle-sober]

Whoah! That changes everything. You aren't seeing a psychiatrist and are being prescribed meds by a regular MD? I missed that information. Very important. I wouldn't let a regular MD prescribe my psych meds for me in a million years.

I hope that doesn't offend you. I'm totally on your side and am hoping that you are okay.

[scott]

No, my family practice doctor is who I'm seeing 3-17 to get a referral to a new psychiatrist. The one I was recently seeing has made it pretty clear through his actions that I am just a drug seeker who does not want to be clean. Even with my mother in the appointment with me he blows me off and only listens to what she has to say. My father, from the first apointment he went to seems to think that this psychiatrist has given up. However, I was only sent to this doctor after seeing a therapist first, then an admissions counselor, then an RN for more admission, then an ARNP who put me on Invega, then I was sent to another psychiatrist from there only to find out that he does not take patients with a history of addiction which I made explicitly clear through the admission process. Finally, since September, I end up with this guy and now he's giving up.

Throughout my research, I think it's possible I may have more than something wrong with me other than addiction. I'm guessing I may have PTSD but the pdoc I was seeing seems to think my anxiety will fade with time. I told him, "Well that's great news, but how long will it take? Would it be possible to give me something to cope until then? Maybe something to help with my quality of life and let me go outside freely." The answer I got was something to the effect that I was just seeking benzo's. Truth is, I don't care what they give me as long as it helps maybe just a tiny bit because dealing with this stuff sober...since September is too hard for me. Hard enough that I relapsed several times before getting clean 12-26 of last year. All I am asking from a doctor is to treat me for the underlying symptoms that are the ORIGINAL reasons why I started self medicating myself with opioids so that I can stay clean EFFECTIVELY, preferably for the rest of my life.

I didn't think that was too much to ask from a doctor specialized in addiction medicine but I guess it was. The bipolar part of my brain now is telling me that this stuff should be happening sooner so I'm sorry if I vent on you guys frequently but it helps. I would probably still be stuck in my head with these racing thoughts that I'm just drug crazy if I wouldn't have listened to those here who encouraged me to find a doctor who will listen...until you feel your meds are appropriate and working so that you can live a healthy life.

I'm not sure what else to say, except thanks for listening. I'm just really impatient about this appointment coming up on the 17th and hope I can get somewhere so that I can start dealing with these recurrant problems and get on with my recovery and start leading a HEALTHY sober life. Now, instead of seeking help from opioids, I'm seeking help from medical professionals. The frustrating part is when the medical professionals let me down when the drugs never did (sort of) even though I know that drugs are not the answer. Thanks guys for your help. I couldn't have made it this far without you.

Oh and HT, I see a therapist tomorrow so I will be sure to bring up everything I've discussed here and see how it goes. But regardless, I'm still sticking with my decision to fire that worthless psychiatrist who doens't listen. I've worked in healthcare for 6 years and the thought of doing that to a patient sickens me.

Hope this clears it up a little bit mle, and thanks for your help. I promise that I don't know where I'd be as far as my mental health is concerned without those here in the mental health forum and your adivce.

[scott]

Went to my appointment today with the therapist and said I probably do have PTSD and am going to get started on a new treatment called EMDR (eye movement desensitization and reprocessing) and hope that will it will help with the flashbacks and nightmares. I am also going to go back and see the ARNP that I originally started out with. I will continue seeing the pdoc that is giving me the suboxone and will stick with him for addiction related issues. The ARNP I started out with seemed to really listen to me and be compassionate. I liked her, it's just that she couldn't prescribe suboxone and at the time I really needed it. Now, I'm doing much better and am thinking about speeding up my taper (currently at 4mg).

I guess it just takes being much more active in my own care than I thought. My therapist was a wonderful help today and I got to talk with a knowledgeable person about the issues I have been having. I was skeptical before the appointment but I kept writing down things when they would pop up and got to discuss ALL of the points in my notebook that I set out to address. All in all, I guess I'm making good headway in leading a healthier life. Thanks to all. I can't wait 'til my next appointments.

[historyteach]

Scott,
That emdr is supposed to be great and very very effective!
I wish you the best.
Let us know how it's going.

Shalom!