Cutters Anonymous

[Isaiah]

Has anyone here every helped start or initiated a support group for mental therapy?

I either have to start up a support group for cutters, or else I could violate probation, or I have to make steps to support one. My arms are slashed to **** and I don't know what to do.

lf I could stop the pain of anyone in my area or online, I would be glad to, but I'm bleeding like a m-ther--cker now and I don't see how I'm capable of leading anyone out of this. I'm not mortally self-inflicted, but I don't see how my therapist expects me lead others out of self-harm.

If you self-harm I ask you to please stop, look at your other options. Persistence is not, not, not pretty. If you're desperate please call 9-11.

[deerwalk]

Did you just cut yourself tonight? Why is starting a group part of probation?

[Morning Glory]

You can try Emotions Anonymous if there is a meeting in your area.

Emotions Anonymous World Meeting List

[historyteach]

Isaiah,
You may also want to look at the sticky up top, on self harm.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...lf-injury.html (Self Injury)
Our greeter, DoneWithIt, posted some awesome materials there.

Also, there is a new poster, NoLongerAJunkie, who posted on that link. I just moved her post to her own thread, so it could be viewed by more people. You may wish to communicate with her, as you both share similar issues. Shared experience, strength and hope lends itself to recovery.

Shalom!

[allport]

Ive no advice to give you just wanted to let you know that Ive been where you are and I came out the other side, I havent done it for over a year, cant say I havent thought about but Ive managed not to give in.

A lot of people dont understand why anyone would do what we do and all I say to those people is I hope you never do.

My thoughts are with you and I hope you find relief. x

[Vintersemestre]

For a couple of nights in a row when it got really bad I slashed up my upper arms pretty badly. There's a theory about cutting being a symptom of a lack of endogenous opiates in the brain, as pain tends to encourage them to release.

[adore79]

Hi Isaiah, I'm sorry you are going through this right now. I was a cutter for many years. I can give you the address to a site that has many cutters on it and it has lots of support. Hang in there

[Isaiah]

Aww, geez. I feel so stupid to fess up to plunging into TWO addictions at once.

Not stupid. We all make mistakes, right? I just regret if I made anyone concerned for me.

Yes, I have a problem. I wore long sleeves all summer long. I didn't cut the night I wrote that post (I meant "bleeding" metaphorically, but I have fairly recent cuts too.)

I *have* to attempt a support group because I have court-mandated psychiatric care, and while I can always tell my psychiatrists "no", I sort of have to go along unless there's some *valid* reason to dispute them--as they report to my probation officer.

I'm doing okay now. Had to reset my medication; I think it's kicking in. Had to reset my connection with God; feel like I re-opened that door pretty well today in chapel. Fell, got back up, learned from my mistake (I hope), and ready to go back to learning how to put one foot in front of the other again.

[deerwalk]

That's a complicated issue. I have a large cross shaped scar on my inner forearm that is over 15 years old and people have had the rudeness and audacity to ask me in front of other people what happened, for instance in a crowded elevator. I also have some cuts that are cross shaped on, my upper arm and in the summer there is nothing I want more than to wear pretty sleeveless shirts to work like the other girls, but I can't- and skirts are out of the question because I have tattoos on my ankles. Ink is another issue and I wish to god it wasn't such a big deal. I just hate having to pay so much for not being a total conformist and having had a different life and coping mechanisms than the majority.So, I feel ugly and am in button down shirts and pants all year long like a man. It sucks and it's a blow to my femininity- and worst of all I did it to myself because I didn't know what to do with all the hurt. Just thought I'd share becaue you did, and that takes courage. Thanks for sharing.

[Isaiah]

Yes, and thank you for yours.

I have very little patience for strangers imposing about mine. I could be wrong, and would be sorry if I am, but I kind of regard their curiosity as being more like starring at a car crash than genuine concern for my health. My response is always to just tell them, in blunt and graphic detail. I suppose two rudes don't make a polite, but I really do find those questions imposing.

Having had a few days to think things over, I'm starting to feel positive about leading a support group. My only worry about it, which I'm going to bring to my therapist, is exactly when and where I'm supposed to do so. He seems to think I have a lot more time and resources on my hands than I do.

[historyteach]

Isaiah,

Seems to me that you've already got a support group going,
Right here,
Right now!

You could use some of the resources from the sticky up top, perhaps?
They are in the sticky on self harm. And they are quite good, I think.

Best wishes,

Shalom!

[Done_With_It]

Here is the site for cutters anon.
Self Mutilators Anonymous Welcome

There's meetings online and I think some in person also.

Hang in there.

[Isaiah]

Thank you both!

I have been to that website, it was very helpful at least in pointing me in a direction. However, it still falls on me to do the promotion, find the meeting space, help direct any referrals, etc. And I am not a take-action, leader type. I'm good for lots of other things, but this kind of stuff is not my forte.

Having just recently been released from the psych ward and with a few "injuries" that haven't even healed yet... I just feel like my psychiatrist is asking quite a whole lot from me. See it's not even that I'm supposed to participate in a support group, he specifically wants me to start one (we checked, there are none in my area.)

[historyteach]

That's probably why he wants you to start one!
Reaching out; helping others;
is often the best way to help ourselves. yes?

Shalom!

[Isaiah]

You're all in cahoots to make me do things I don't like to do.

[Isaiah]

Umm, what I meant by "things I don't like to do"

-Planning and organizing things social in nature.

-Not: reaching out and helping others.

[Done_With_It]

I'm with you, I don't quite understand why he wants you to start a group.
It's a lot of pressure which is not always the best thing for a self harmer, IMO.

I think it would be hard to lead a group while you are actively still self harming also.

Have you talked to him/her about this. One thing I found in my years of self harming was that the majority of therapists don't understand self harm, and many of the things they try and do can be harmful, they are doing what they think is best, but it is such a misunderstood thing we do, we are often not given the best advice.

This is just my opinion. I'm not trying to go against your therapist at all, just saying if you feel strongly about this, I would talk to him about it. You do have that right.
Maybe he can explain more why he thinks it would help you and you can talk to him about your concerns.

There is a great sheet up on the stickies called
Impulse Control Log
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/1622292-post3.html

Anyways Just My Opinion. Take it for what it's worth. lol

[Isaiah]

Oh, he's sick of me doing what's comfortable to me! That's one of our big things. I'm evidently not willing to go along with anything that doesn't satisfy my agenda. On that I'm willing to comply; I've been fighting his ass for a while now.

Failure at starting a group scares me less then failing to do it well. I know the cutter spirit. I'm not willing to take another person's well-being in any part in my hands. Even if I base a group that is totally unfocused upon me, it's going to be on me, right?

[Done_With_It]

Best Wishes to you~Stay strong~