Crappy Meetings.... - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Mamabear · 07-24-2003, 07:22 AM

Now I know why I have to shop around for meetings where I feel like I fit. I went to an Alanon meeting and felt that those there turned their noses up when I mentioned my son's pot addiction and bipolar diagnosis. It was a meeting gone awry....cross talking...neediness...small minded thinking about addiction...even more prejudice about mental illness. I Found it so depressing. I have a hesitancy to try another meeting. Any suggestions?

claudia5 · 07-24-2003, 10:56 AM

i would suggest keep trying. some meetings are good and some arent the greatest. just take what you can from them, is all i can say. if you do have the chance to try other groups in your area- there is nothing wrong with that! i went two weeks to a group and was soooooooo frustrated. the meetings werent bad, but i wasnt meeting anyone. i tried another group (instead of giving up) and it was a world of difference and that is where im going to keep going now! so just from my experience- take for yourself what you can use from a meeting- leave the rest- try everything you can (changing places or times that you go). you may have just walked in to one bad time in there. good luck! dont give up!

StillInTheDumps · 07-24-2003, 11:38 AM

MamaBear,

I am an AA/NA. My wife experienced the same thing in Al-Anon. She asked about addictions other then alcohol. They were not to kind to her about it. You could try Nar-Anon which is open to all mind altering addictions. If not, there should be more then 1 Al-Anon in town. Try a different location and day. You will probably see different people there (but it might be the same people), I don't know.....but you can try it if you wish.

Also, there may be morning meetings and evening meetings. Should be different people in mornings then evenings. You may want to try the opposite of when you attended. (if you went to an evening 1 try a morning 1 next time) That is if it is possible. A babysitter may be worth it to find out.

I will finish on this note. It is important to find a group where you are comfortable. I was uncomfortable and nervous at meetings for at least a few weeks, maybe months (mind is still cloudy) After some time I chose to be a member at the group I was most comfortable. Still nervous sometimes now after approx 500 AA meetings and approx 150 NA meetings.

Mamabear · 07-24-2003, 12:49 PM

Thanks Claudia5 and Still in the dumps,

Once I build up my nerve again I'll try an evening meeting.
Appreciate the advice.
mb

07-24-2003, 07:22 AM	#1 (permalink)
Mamabear Member Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: phila, pa Posts: 233	Crappy Meetings.... Now I know why I have to shop around for meetings where I feel like I fit. I went to an Alanon meeting and felt that those there turned their noses up when I mentioned my son's pot addiction and bipolar diagnosis. It was a meeting gone awry....cross talking...neediness...small minded thinking about addiction...even more prejudice about mental illness. I Found it so depressing. I have a hesitancy to try another meeting. Any suggestions? __________________ Mamabear

07-24-2003, 12:49 PM	#4 (permalink)
Mamabear Member Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: phila, pa Posts: 233	Thanks Claudia5 and Still in the dumps, Once I build up my nerve again I'll try an evening meeting. Appreciate the advice. mb __________________ Mamabear

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07-24-2003, 10:56 AM	#2 (permalink)
claudia5 Paused Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: TX Posts: 6	i would suggest keep trying. some meetings are good and some arent the greatest. just take what you can from them, is all i can say. if you do have the chance to try other groups in your area- there is nothing wrong with that! i went two weeks to a group and was soooooooo frustrated. the meetings werent bad, but i wasnt meeting anyone. i tried another group (instead of giving up) and it was a world of difference and that is where im going to keep going now! so just from my experience- take for yourself what you can use from a meeting- leave the rest- try everything you can (changing places or times that you go). you may have just walked in to one bad time in there. good luck! dont give up!

07-24-2003, 11:38 AM	#3 (permalink)
StillInTheDumps Paused Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: The Thin Ice Posts: 105	MamaBear, I am an AA/NA. My wife experienced the same thing in Al-Anon. She asked about addictions other then alcohol. They were not to kind to her about it. You could try Nar-Anon which is open to all mind altering addictions. If not, there should be more then 1 Al-Anon in town. Try a different location and day. You will probably see different people there (but it might be the same people), I don't know.....but you can try it if you wish. Also, there may be morning meetings and evening meetings. Should be different people in mornings then evenings. You may want to try the opposite of when you attended. (if you went to an evening 1 try a morning 1 next time) That is if it is possible. A babysitter may be worth it to find out. I will finish on this note. It is important to find a group where you are comfortable. I was uncomfortable and nervous at meetings for at least a few weeks, maybe months (mind is still cloudy) After some time I chose to be a member at the group I was most comfortable. Still nervous sometimes now after approx 500 AA meetings and approx 150 NA meetings.

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