I am having bad worries tonight.

[Paulos]

I woke up today at like 5:30pm... *lovely time schedule* only to find out the new doctors office I'm going to is most likely not going to give me my Xanax, which helps me cope with life. Consider that an addiction perhaps yes, and it could be giving me side effects I didn't know Benzos could bring memory loss/concentration problems...

However I'm finding myself harder to express things... I feel bad, worried that I won't be able to handle my house alone someday, I feel I always need to have my hand held, and I'm really afraid that someone will challenge me for my house/living quarters... and I'm not even good enough in them anyway, like shopping lists I'm not so great at, my mother has to make my calls for my doctor appointments... it's like I suck in almost everything. People say "you can do it, just try it" but my anxiety/fear gets the best of me, and they speak of cognitive therapy... I DO THAT ALL THE TIME to keep myself from bouncing off the walls, and then again I do the opposite talking to myself about how bad things are... it's just ... I feel I've lived the best years of my life and now that I see how scary things can be in the real world/reality *by even merely watching a show like The Simpsons that explains about American Culture in comedy* I get scared... just thought I'd share that.

[Paulos]

By the way I'd like to apologize that I don't chip in enough in the forums and help people out, sorry if it's like I'm using you all for information it's just I'm so scared and sad at times... sorry for the pesterence.

[historyteach]

(((Paulos)))

No need to be sorry.
We're all here to get and to give our ESH.
Sometimes we need to get more than we give. That's ok.
There will be time enough later to give back. There always is.

I want to point out that, once more, I see you "futurizing," or worrying about the future that isn't here yet.
The doctor may not give you a prescription. You're afraid that you may not be able to handle your house "some day."
We don't know what tomorrow will bring, my friend. We only have today. Live in the present. It's enough to deal with for now.

Does that make sense?
Be well, my friend...

Shalom!

[Paulos]

Yeah I guess it does make sense but having a constant reminder *autism and my own inabilities* and always being overwhelmed makes me scared, and feeling worthless so living in the present is kind of difficult I guess and then thinking of the future can make me feel even worse...

[historyteach]

I can honest tell you that I do *not* know what it is like to have autism.

But, I *do* know what it is to futurize.
And I *do* know what it is to be scared and to feel worthless.
And I *do* know what it is to feel my own inabilities.

So, we are not that different, are we, Paulos?

Live in the moment. Feel the present. We do not know what the future will bring, and worrying about it will only bring us stress and unhappiness. That's why you feel worse.

What is going good right now?
And if nothing is going good, what can you do to make it better?
Now!
Make your plan, Paulos. It's *your* life!

Shalom!

[msiam207]

Originally Posted by Paulos

I woke up today at like 5:30pm... *lovely time schedule* only to find out the new doctors office I'm going to is most likely not going to give me my Xanax, which helps me cope with life.

If you have been on it regularly he/she should. I'd like to say "has to", but legally does not but should. Benzo withdrawals are very severe, for cold turkey they require hospitalization. If he/she is that stubborn as to say, "Well, you'd be better off" than you can just find another doctor but in the meantime go to the emergency room.

You can not come off benzos cold turkey. It's lethal, and can cause brain damage even if you slip through it without anguish.

Some doctors believe anyway that it's better to go that route despite its risks and damage because the odds of getting somebody who appreciates benzos off them is pretty much impossible, but that marks a bias on their part against what are really the safest psychoactive prescription drugs we have in legal medicine. Call him/her out on that and find out what him/her would rather prescribe and put together a case against his/her ethics.

[historyteach]

msiam,
You're jumping the gun.
Please don't join in the anxiety building futurizing with Paulos.

Though what you say about the withdrawal from benzos may be true, NO ONE knows what the doc may or may not do. And you're building an ethical case against the doc! And assuming motivation for him/her!

It's best to stick to the facts. And to offer your ESH -- experience, strength and hope to Paulos and others here on SR. That's why we're here. To give and get support.

Shalom!

[msiam207]

It's a matter of communication. I use words logically, sort of like math. So we're all confused.

"And you're building an ethical case against the doc!"

No, I built nothing. I merely stated, to response of what was said

" Originally Posted by Paulos View Post
I woke up today at like 5:30pm... *lovely time schedule* only to find out the new doctors office I'm going to is most likely not going to give me my Xanax, which helps me cope with life."

That;

"You can not come off benzos cold turkey. "

Thus;

"Call him/her out on that and find out what him/her would rather prescribe and put together a case against his/her ethics."

Back to

if the premise;

"the new doctors office I'm going to is most likely not going to give me my Xanax,"

Then;

""Call him/her out on that and find out what him/her would rather prescribe and put together a case against his/her ethics.""

[historyteach]

You are FUTURIZING.
And that's a total waste of time.
And it's anxiety producing for Paulos and many others.

If you are here to share your EXPERIENCE, STRENGTH and HOPE, it's welcome.
This is a mental health forum, not a logic forum.
I'm sure you can find a logic forum elsewhere on the net to play any type of word games you want.

No one here is confused at all, are we?
Now, back to Paulos...

Shalom!