me, bipolar?

[cmh]

hi! i was diagnosed bi polar about 1 1/2 years ago. but at that time i refused to accept it, even though i had 3 different docs tell me that. i went ahead and let them put me on depakote and buspar. but that messed up my sleeping and made more more irritable and more likely to go off on people. so i quit everything. meds, doctors, everything. then after everyone who used to be around me stoped coming around because i was such a b**ch. i realized that maybe the doctors were right. maybe i might be bi polar. but im not even really sure what the signs are. i just know i get real mad, real quick. then i can be ok. now my counselor wants me to see the doctor and be put on lithium. but im scared. i dont want to walk around like a zombie. i just want my moods leveled out and want my friends back. they say that theyre still my friends, but they are kinda scared of me. when i get mad, i get really violent. so maybe if lithium wont make me be a zombie ill do it.

I'm not a doctor, but I would give the depakote a good try before lithium. Were you on the depakote long enough to see if it helps? Lithium is a good medication, but I would try others first. I work with clients who are bi-polar and I don't like what the lithium does to them. Sometimes it is absolutely necessary though. It takes time to find the right combination of medications that work.

Do some research yourself on treatments of bi-polar. I think there is a post on this board on medication. I'll look for it and bring it up to the top.
Hugs,
MG

Common Symptoms
- Diarrhea
- Dry mouth or thirst
- Nausea or vomiting
- Tremor
- Drowsiness
- Muscle weakness

Less Common to Rare Symptoms
- Rash
- Weakness or fatigue
- Weight gain

Life-threatening Symptoms
- None expected


Possible Overdose Symptoms
Moderate overdose:
- Diarrhea
- Nausea

Large overdose:
- Coma
- Vomiting
- Stupor (impaired state of consciousness marked by a diminished reaction to external stimuli)
- Convulsions
- Muscle weakness

What to Do in Case of Overdose
- Dial 911 for emergency help or call your local poison control center.