Intrusive thoughts

[grrrr]

hi,

** minor trigger warning ** not the happiest thread





I am new to this forum and maybe this is very obvious and normal, but I don't see a lot of threads to discuss. I have anxieties that manifest in me seeing images of bad things happening and having intrusive thoughts about events. Sometimes as simple as me breaking the coffee pot or a minor car accident, but I can see it happen in my mind and have to quickly shift away. When I am happy, I have the opposite effect of seeing situations I wish to occur, people giving me respect for my work, etc. that are equalling unlikely to happen if I am honest with myself. These are equally upsetting.

I am just wondering if this is something that you have experienced. I have had some bad days lately and want to know if y'all experience similar things and if medications might help.

I am happy to be no longer using pot every day/all day and the anxiety was the worst when I was quitting. I still drink a little more than I should, but I am happy to be away from my drug of choice and feel much better.

I apologize for the long first thread... K

[Lilya]

Hi Grrr and welcome.

I´ve had these thoughts on and off for a long, long time. Ever since I got ill. I think it comes with the bi-polar disorder and anxiety. Thankfully, it has been three years since I had them the last time. The episodes are becoming less frequent.

What works best for me is to rationalize the negative thoughts by asking why? Why should all these things happen? Is that on the agenda for the day? Is it reasonable or even remotely likely?

I use yoga, anger management and calming thoughts to work against it. If it´s really bad, I try to "talk to these thoughts". I tell them they can stay for a limited amount of time and then they have to go. I´m simply not having them in my brain.

The best trick is to keep busy. That drives them away. If all else fails, I write a short story based on these thoughts. Then I realize how absurd and fictonal they really are.

Congratulation on your commitment to stop using pot. I was addicted to it along with most other drugs, but I´m clean now for many years. Pot made me paranoid so I hade thoughts like that all the time.

It is my firm belief that to conquer this illness we need to become totally clean and sober. I couldn´t work on it when I drank, because drinking increases depression and paranoia.

Best of luck to you and remember that this is a long but exciting journey. The path is laid stone by stone. It´s one day at a time, sometimes one hour at a time.

Love and light

[shutterbug]

Grrr.... i don't think i've experienced this, but I wanted to welcome you to the forum! Glad you're hear.

Hugs,
jenna

[historyteach]

Welcome, Grrr!
I sometimes "see" things like you suggest. I just thought it was the result of an over active imagination! LOL!
I hope to get to know you better as we both grow in our recovery.

Shalom!

[grrrr]

thanks for your responses. this definitely seems to be how my anxiety manifests itself. I have learned to stay away from caffeine, drink green tea, do yoga and walk more and question the root of these thoughts.

Lilya, i really appreciate the idea of writing a story about them and I do practice many of the other things you suggested. I also appreciate the empathy. Often times these thoughts cause me to talk to myself/blurt out when i dont mean to and really question myself.

I have really had more good days than bad days lately, and I will focus on that.

cheers,
K

[Bozo]

I still play out scenes in my head with worst case scenario endings. The weird thing is when I have a thought like that, the end result is supposed to be me dealing with some kind of unbearable pain.

There is prolly a reason why I think something disastrous is bound to happen to me at some point. Could be I have lived my life as a victim or a people pleaser.

Could me Im just mentally effed up from bad blood coursing my veins or as Deb said, and over active imagination.

I think the writing idea is great. I wrote many of horror stories as early as third grade, my parents thought they were very creative and good.

Looking back though, when I have these intrusive(self damaging thoughts), I just ignore them and try to stay focused on positive stuff.