One of my best friends, and the elephant in the living room.

[Chris38]

The elephant in the living room is my friend's uncanny ability to just lose it at the most odd and even worse over the most ridiculously stupist thing. I guess you can say I'm kind of at fault here too, because while I have witnessed this behavior, I never said or did anything about it, for the first time, it was directed at me.

Basically I mentioned to my friend(the homeowner and host) that I'd send him a file he needed. I remembered it at the last minute, and forgot to do it like 3 times during the week. I figure I'm here I'll do it now. I said let me send you this file now, and he mentioned (We'll say Angry Person) was next in line to use the pc. Fearing I'd forget once again, and while it was not a big deal he got the file I just wanted to follow through on what I'd say I'd do, so I said this will take like 2 minutes. I vpn'd into my pc, and started zipping up the file. It was taking a little bit, and it was literally 3 bars away from a 2 minute zip process(if anyone here has used winzip, you'll know what I am talking about.) So he lunges off his chair and starts yelling at me telling me "THIS PROCESS IS ENDING RIGHT NOW! I WAS IN ******* LINE TO USE THE PC AND YOU JUST JUMPED IN AND YOU WERE ******* RUDE!" "GET THE **** OFF THE PC". I basicaly didnt think was worth it, the guy is going through issues with a girlfriend of his, but he was completely out of line. He went in the yard just waiting for him to come out, I was livid. Instead I said knock yourself out and went out and resumed the party. He comes back out, I asked him if he was done and went in still feeling a little angry, and I was able to start the transfer process. I sat there just pissed at hell, I have done so much for this guy, gone above and beyond the realms of friendship for him. He goes off on my other friends too when he either disagrees or finds something that ticks him off and/or offends him.

I basically called a cab and left. My anger was building and I did not want to go back out there based on his unstable condition. In addition to having respects to my friend's household and guests, there was a child around too. My friend (The host) told me to walk around the block with him, and see whats up. I took his advice, and I walk in and he's cheering himself on to some guy saying "Yeah I ****ing through him off the off the computer. The guy he was cheering too was someone he did not even like, which at that point made me lose all respect for him and it just wasnt worth it. I went home, no need for the other guests to be subjected to this stupidity.

And thats what makes me so livid, this whole thing is so stupid, and I'm concenred because I still love this guy like a brother, but if he continues his rants and raves, and if it is ever directed at me again I will tell him to take a walk with me, but the words will not be kind. If does it in my home, or to any of my guest, especially my fiancee I will politely ask him to leave.

The thing that gets me is the whole stupidity of it. Did I do something to **** him off? So far I've recieved phone calls from 4 people telling me that he was talking about me last night, why doesnt the guy just call me? Do I call him right now and attempt to settle it? Do I let him settle down for a few days? I dont know. I'm sad right now because in addition to myself, I do not like my friends or family to be disrespected. And I will tell him this and hope he can accept the fact that if he ever does go off again, publicly or privately the elephant will be discussed, the elephant being his anger issues.

My fiancee thought I did the right thing by leaving, he think's I'm a wuss for leaving but I really do not care considering he is talking to everyone about this EXCEPT me. I'm the easiest person in the world to reach. And especially after all I've done for this guy, defended him when folks made fun of him for his private issues(non anger related, and would rather not discuss them here) whenever he had nothing to do he was always welcome in my home to watch a movie, my home was his home, get your own soda, as many as you want, me casa su casa, etc. Not to mention the fact I helped get him his job that he has been working with for the past several years.

I really do not know how to handle this, I will discuss this with my psychiatrist this week, but just wanted to get your take on it. Maybe I was a tad rude, but I was not doing anything on the PC for my benefit, it was for the benefit of someone else, someone who OWNED the computer.

A lot of this is venting, I'm not even sure I'm being as objective as I should be, but one thing for sure, I fear I am going to lose a friend due to my integrity and his anger issues.

Thanks for listening. - Chris

[Live]

I don't think I want friends like that.

I sure wouldn't sweep it under the rug, that much I know.