im sry

[lilymae]

hello everyone im sry about my last post i wasnt fairto do that all though myfeeling were true i cant expect you all to bare the burden of being my only life line i told my therapist that i have been feeling more depressed and i am going to see my pshycaatrist this week i at the moment do not feel much better other than to know that someone else here knows and that i didnot have to go back to the hospital my one hope is that my meds will not be increased but instead that they will help me learn to fight this demon with my inner strength their hel;p as well as gods i know for the time that i have been on here my behavior has been rather childish and foolish i also know that i cannot use my diesease as a crutch in life i take responsiblity for all the actions which hav eled me to this point perhaps i was not fully capable to prevent it but none the less it is still my fault. i thank you all for caring so much and for putting up with so much in the short time ive known u i do not garuntee that i will never again have moments of depression or feeling suicidal but i do know that if i do i can come here for encouragement and support and if need be i have a support team here at home that i can call on so thank you so much.
with lots of love and hope for abright future amanda

[lilymae]

also in the past few weeks alot has changed in my life i have gotten back in touch with several old friends i have patched up things with them and myself ive worked hard at getting along with my family ,im getting out of the house more almost every friday to be exact. i have myspace and i talk to friends that moved away on there i got a cell phone im preparing to get my ged and drivers licence and im picking out a car at the moment life is good and yes i know it can go back downa t anytime but next time ill be prepared and it wont win not next time .....not ever again.
with lots of love amanda

Glad you're still with us, Amanda.

[jrmar]

Keep with it, Jay