Was I out of line?

[forgottenchild]

I'm a recovering self-injurer, and I'm pretty open about that fact when I talk to people I know. I was in class today (I go to a local university), and the professor asked the class to give examples of what would be considered abnormal, or "crazy" behavior in our society. There were the traditional answers, but then one man raised his hand and said "cutting yourself, or hurting yourself. you gotta be totally crazy to do that". I couldn't believe he had said that, and then several class members piped up their agreement. I sat there for a minute, and then raised my hand and said that I was a self-injurer, and that it stemmed from some intense emotional issues surrounding family members, my past, and a brother who is a drug addict. I asked him if he thought that I was crazy. The backpeddling was so fierce that I thought he was gonna have a stroke! I then told him that people who hurt themselves are usually not crazy, just wounded. I was told that they never would have known that I was a self-injurer because I don't have "the look". Sure I dress like a Gap ad, but that doesn't mean anything. My question is, was I out of line? Should I have left it up to the psychology professor to set him straight?

[Arura]

Hello Sweetie,...No,... your Not crazy,....maybe in the 'seal sense of alittle bit crazy'.....like all of us,....but NO,...like you said it stems form pain,...and its classic transfarance of pain from you head to your where ever you have hurt yourself,....!!!

Im also an ex selfharmer,....and we talk about it hear sometimes,....!!!
its a painful one for the many that it affect,...!!! My love is with you,...n Dont listen to them,....!!!

Here is a link for you...!

www.kidshealth.org/

Many hug to you .......

[Ngokpa]

It's a judgement call whether or not you want to let a roomful of people know about that sort of thing. In some instances it wouldn't be wise. But it sounds like in this case you were the teacher, and did a compassionate thing.

I let people know I'm a recovering drunk fairly regularly. Sometimes that means getting typecast, and having people's issues brought up. But it can spark communication, and things sure can get interesting.

[BigSis]

As someone who has been a cutter in the past, I know how crazy *I* thought it was... it was decades later before I even knew anyone else DID it!

Perhaps it was your Higher Power helping you to enlighten some of the others in the class.... there is no guarantee that even the psychology professor would have had the best idea of what self-injuring is about. Good for you for being so danged brave about it.

I tried to share this with my Alanon sponsor once, but it just scared the bejabbers outta her. So I explained what I know about it... and she was also surprised.

For me, cutting was a way to releive the pain of intense rage... it had absolutely nothing to do with wanting to really kill myself. But that is where most people go in their thinking.

I think it sounds like you handled it quite well... and maybe that young man learned a thing or three. And maybe whomever it is that he was thinking of when he first responded has gained a little empathy.... via your bravery.

(((forgottenchild))))

[Phinneas]

Originally Posted by forgottenchild

My question is, was I out of line? Should I have left it up to the psychology professor to set him straight?

NO! Your answer was perfect. I bet you taught those students a very important lesson about judging people. Well done!

[ccgirl]

Nah! You're not crazy. I would have done the same thing!

[Ten Chips Down]

Originally Posted by forgottenchild

Should I have left it up to the psychology professor to set him straight?

Hi Fogottenchild,

As someone said, it can be riske` to tell a room full of people such very personal things because of the general public's ignorance.

But in this instance, BOY did you show them! The guy turned red-faced, back-peddled - and was educated in the process - as I'm QUITE sure the rest of the class was as well.

Michael J. Fox has been a leading advocate of not only finding a cure for Parkinson's, but more adamantly, for not hiding in a closet from society out of shame for our disabilities.

It is now into second millennium--WAY past time that society became more confortable around people who are different (for whatever reason) and stopped fearing, turning away from, and in the process ostracizing them.

So, you're the hero here, child. Ya done good.

TenChips

[shutterbug]

if YOU don't feel you went over the line....then BRAVO!!! It takes SO MUCH courage for many of us to do what you did in that situation.

You shined a very bright light on a bunch of people's attitudes about mental illness and what it "looks" like or doesn't. And that we all have our own struggles and that doesn't make us crazy.

You go girl!!!!!

[sugarssweetpea]

i think that you did the right thing. i remember that when i used to cut, i used to make up excuses on what happened (no one ever believed them of course ). i just did not want to admit that is what i did. i remember when i finally admitted it to some of the people who accused me of it. i felt so much better. they respected me more for it also. i guess just the being honest about it and admitting that there was a problem. i, too felt like i was the only one in the whole world who did that. some say that it is a way to let the so called demons out. let the hurt out somehow, some way.