Sex after drugs...

[big97]

Sorry if this isnt appropiate or if its in the wrong spot, but this is driving me crazy and I dont know who to talk to about it! A little of my background, I just turned 24 years old Christmas Eve, ive been off drugs for a little over a year and a half except for two mistakes, one on X and the other on Coke. Well I did drugs for quite some time, I started at around 14 with Weed and then soon after started with the Coke, Glass, Exctasy, and pretty much anything I could do. I kept it up till I was around 22 if I remember correctly(and I dont most of the time). Anyways, I was very addicted to Glass. I dont know if anyone reading this has done it or heard the "rumors" about how it makes your penis small, and things of that nature. Well I havent had sex in over a year and a half closer to 2 years, and it really makes me wonder what its going to be like without the drugs thats what "scares" me I guess. I know back when I was doing all that I was doing, it was fun, I lasted long, I didnt really think my "manhood" was that small. But now I wonder, did it really get smaller? Will I be able to last like I did back then? Will I be able to satisfy a female like I used to? I even have thought about using Coke or Glass only when I was going to get laid. I havent had sex also because I had alot of unprotected sex, but im going to go get tested and would like to get into a relationship and "make love" if I find someone I really like. Ive been thinking about this close to two years, I dont know who to tell! Again sorry if its not appropiate but I had to get it off my chest!

I hope you feel a little better having got it off your chest 97. Getting tested sounds like a really good idea, as does getting tested regularly. I don't know about Glass or it side-effects, real or rumored, but I'd imagine that the "right woman" won't focus on those.

Getting clean is a big step, and not an easy one, try not to give that up for anything, it won't help the reality of your situation now or later. I'm glad you shared, I'm gald your here, and I hope you stick around.

[ChrisMan]

Big97,

Glad you shared -- and I agree, get tested. It will help put your mind at ease and also might give you a chance to ask a medical professionals those questions you have concerning the drugs and your "manhood."

I think it is also good to hear that you haven't had sex in a couple years -- that may sound odd to some, but it can really help to clarrify things a bit. It can help one to grow and give one perspective. It might even be good to keep waiting until you are in a commitment with another person, something that you know will last and is not just another "relationship."

Also, any test you have taken now will be very accurate, because it has been so long since your last sexual contact.

Wishing you all the best.

[deenrose]

Thank you for sharing. I am basically a new comer like you but I believe that I have something worthwhile to share with you. I would say that this is the place for that kind of stuff. You should not hold it inside. I have heard it said in meetings that "We are as sick as our secrets." So Get it out... The great sex that you thought you were having while high was only an illusion. I can remember my active using and how I thought the same. You see, my D.O.C. was cocaine which I have since learned effects the part in our brains that regulates pleasure. Sex is definately pleasurable. Anyway, Shortly thereafter I would lose feeling 'down there' and could not for the life of me get it back up again. On top of that I would be up for hours trying to go to sleep. Now that I am in recovery, the sex that I enjoy is 100 times better.

One of the concerns that I had after reading your thread was that I felt that you were minimizing your two relapses. Do you attend NA/AA meetings? We suggest abstaining from all mood and mind altering substances. This includes alcohol. If you are an addict, your using will only get worse if you continue.

[tramp]

hell if i know what glass is. i sobered up in 95. i'm 50 and have a 7 month old daughter, a 3 year old son, and a 24 year old wife. what's the question?
there's more to it than size and lasting brother.

[big97]

Thanks guys, I just think to much sometimes! Have to much time on my hands I guess, I let thoughts go in my head for days, weeks, even months and dont realize it till its driving me freakin crazy. Im going to try to go to the doctor by the end of the month, and I hope im ok cause im going to be taking a full physical and std tests, aids test, etc. I realize all the other stuff shouldnt really matter, but being a man and "knowing what girls want" it makes me wonder about such crap. Anyways if I do end up with someone I dont want that kind of girl, so i shoulnt worry about that. Also, I know I kinda make my 2 mess ups look like they were small, or just whatever, and I dont know what to think of it msyelf. Just the other night(last night I think) I took some pill my friend gave me(she said it was Aderol, I dont know I just take things and dont really care at times, especially if im drunk). Ive taken pills and done other stupid things that are "legal" and dont even really think about it, I dont think thats right either. Anyways, I did go to NA for sometime a few months back, but Im going to start going again this sunday, I keep messing up and saying ill stop and ill be good but I go crazy and I just loose it sometimes. I dont know whats the deal, hopefully ill figure it out quick tho because I feel like im going to lose it again and end up where I started when I first moved here, I dont really want that. Man some days ill wake up happy and exited cause I made it thru another day and im sober, and a minute later ill be drinking looking for dope and trying to fight or do something stupid. I decided to quit drinking yet again(the new year just started and I think this is my 2nd time, cmon I need to get serious man!), but I seriously do need to sit down and look at myself, cause from what others are telling me im not anything nice right now, its odd that I dont see it but I need to open my freakin eyes and realize what im doing. Thanks for letting me go on and on, i need to go to bed now im freakin tired. Alrato.

[Time2Surrender]

At 43 I am having the best sex ever. And I am doing it clean and sober. Go get tested. Focus on your recovery. Work on yourself. As we get healthier, we will start to attract healthier partners. And if you really want to meet women, (healthy ones) work the 12 steps. You will be beating them off with a stick. I guarantee it.