Angry? That's funny!

[Dan]

Excerpt from an interesting article by the American Psychological Association.

"Silly humor' can help defuse rage in a number of ways. For one thing, it can help you get a more balanced perspective. When you get angry and call someone a name or refer to them in some imaginative phrase, stop and picture what that word would literally look like. if you're at work and you think of a co-worker as a 'dirt-bag' or a 'single-cell life form,' for example, picture a large bag full of dirt (or an amoeba) sitting at your colleagues desk, talking on the phone, going to meetings. Do this whenever a name comes into your head about another person. If you can, draw a picture of what the actual thing might look like. This will take a lot of the edge off your fury; and humor can always be relied on to help un-knot a tense situation.

The underlying message of highly angry people, Dr. Deffenbacher says, is 'things oughta go my way!' Angry people tend to feel that they are morally correct, that any blocking or changing of their plans is an unbearable indignity and that they should NOT have to suffer this way. Maybe other people do, but not them.

When you feel that urge, he suggests, picture yourself as a god or goddess, a supreme ruler who owns the streets and stores and office space, striding alone and having your way in all situations while others defer to you. The more detail you can get into your imaginary scenes, the more chances you have to realize that maybe you are being a little unreasonable; you'll also realize how unimportant the things you're angry about really are.

There are two cautions in using humor. First, don't try to just 'laugh off' your problems; rather, use humor to help yourself face them more constructively. Second, don't give in to harsh, sarcastic humor; that's just another form of unhealthy anger expression.

What these techniques have in common is a refusal to take yourself to seriously. Anger is a serious emotion, but it's often accompanied by ideas that, if examined, can make you laugh."

Full article on anger.
Here.

Originally Posted by DangerousDan

picture yourself as a god or goddess, a supreme ruler who owns the streets and stores and office space, striding alone and having your way in all situations while others defer to you

Thats what caused me so many problems before recovery.

I understand his point though. Fortunatley my sense of humor is fully functional these days, and it does help. If I let it.

Thanks Dan.

[Dan]

Yeah Doug, that it's all about me thing we do so well...
I kind of did a double take when I read that too. But in the end, whatever works to help me deal with anger is a welcomed gift. I find a lot of the things that used to make me angry no longer do simply because I'm able to take a step back now and look at things a little more objectively. Questioning my beliefs about things has been a tremendous help.
You know, like... Dang, my son is making that noise just to irritate me on purpose...
Nope. He's a four year old kid finding his place in the world is what he's doing.
It's not always easy to laugh at things. But I'm getting better at it.