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| they took my picture Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Maryland
Posts: 129
| I will fight
I try so many things, never giving up... All goes black and the house around me closes in. Life is smothering me and i'm hardly moving. How many more things can I handle? I carry this smile for protection, too haunted to think about the past. I shed these tears for survival, too cautious to think of the future. I carry on this routine and gait, too insane to stay in the moment. I think about life like i'm running a marathon. I miss the days when I would lose myself in the arms of another... Now its like i'm on this mission. just get through, just get through... Things are supposed to get better when you change your ways. Its been 2 years and I haven't reached ground zero. Yet how is it that i'm happy? I have lost almost everything. All the bridges burned down. I'm trapped on this island somehow happy. yet how is it that i'm so sad? God gives me consolation when I really need it. It actually makes me feel guilty. I guess I know that i'm always moving forward despite being held down. Or maybe I am just in denial... maybe I wont ever see the springtime come... I catch a scent or a warm breeze, It picks me up but I still keep getting snowed in. I just still got to believe! |
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