Went to bed...... - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

2stop · 06-10-2007, 07:52 PM

but here I am. Up again.
Fight over th phone with husband.
said things I shouldn't have.....reacted to his every
predictable comments to me.

Many times my insomnia is related to
my relaionship. Him being a trucker
Me always here ta home
bitter and frustrated
some days..........I open my mouth when I feel
hurt or offended
and then I feel guilty, and then I can't sleep.

of all the progress I've made these past couple years
I don't think I've done too well relationship wise.

I keep fighting that feeling of guilt that I don't
make an income. I am reminded almost every time
I talk to husband that we ARE a one income
family, it's hard. He says I don't budget.......
so this ACT 91 foreclosure crap we've
been going through is of course....MY fault..I don't save enough money.

I cut my own hair, I do my own nails.
all my clothes past year have been second hand
(doesn't bother me) I watch the lights, the water running, I don't get cable or
satellite tv..........I shop yard sales, thrift stores dollar stores
have been trying to get stuff around for a yard sale but have been quite sick lately
and fx foot...and blah blah blah.
It doesn't matter to him
HE is ashamed of me. I don't work and am getting sicker.

I really really wish I could be working outside the home...
BUT I DO WORK! I work alot here. The yard, the house, the kids
the pets, the bills,
I am soooooo tired...so sick, and in soooo much pain.

I pray the ortho doc I see Tuesday will help me.
Maybe by end of summer I can work, or start college.

I don't know...I am doingthe best I can, I KNOW that.

but I also understand I am a burden to my family. I try not to be....
I never milk being sick or in pain.
In fact I probably don't rest enough........
I want to pull my own weight.

I want to be young and healthy again.....
don't we all? LOL.........

Will try and go back to bed.
maybe writing out how I feel will help.
I am sure it will get better.
Just been a hrad time.

2stop · 06-11-2007, 04:25 AM

Tossed and turned all night. I hurt so bad this morning it is unreal.

Tomorrow I see a specialist for some of my pain issues, maybe I'll sleep better aftre seeing him, and not talking to hubby on the phone before bed!

***Morning Glory*** · 06-25-2007, 07:26 PM

How are you feeling Tammie?

I've been thinking about you.

06-10-2007, 07:52 PM	#1 (permalink)
2stop ~Author of My Life~ Join Date: May 2003 Location: Doing what I thought I couldn't.... Posts: 4,666	Went to bed...... but here I am. Up again. Fight over th phone with husband. said things I shouldn't have.....reacted to his every predictable comments to me. Many times my insomnia is related to my relaionship. Him being a trucker Me always here ta home bitter and frustrated some days..........I open my mouth when I feel hurt or offended and then I feel guilty, and then I can't sleep. of all the progress I've made these past couple years I don't think I've done too well relationship wise. I keep fighting that feeling of guilt that I don't make an income. I am reminded almost every time I talk to husband that we ARE a one income family, it's hard. He says I don't budget....... so this ACT 91 foreclosure crap we've been going through is of course....MY fault..I don't save enough money. I cut my own hair, I do my own nails. all my clothes past year have been second hand (doesn't bother me) I watch the lights, the water running, I don't get cable or satellite tv..........I shop yard sales, thrift stores dollar stores have been trying to get stuff around for a yard sale but have been quite sick lately and fx foot...and blah blah blah. It doesn't matter to him HE is ashamed of me. I don't work and am getting sicker. I really really wish I could be working outside the home... BUT I DO WORK! I work alot here. The yard, the house, the kids the pets, the bills, I am soooooo tired...so sick, and in soooo much pain. I pray the ortho doc I see Tuesday will help me. Maybe by end of summer I can work, or start college. I don't know...I am doingthe best I can, I KNOW that. but I also understand I am a burden to my family. I try not to be.... I never milk being sick or in pain. In fact I probably don't rest enough........ I want to pull my own weight. I want to be young and healthy again..... don't we all? LOL......... Will try and go back to bed. maybe writing out how I feel will help. I am sure it will get better. Just been a hrad time.
	__________________ Many Hugs and Hope too, Tammie "Think of all the beauty still left around you and BE HAPPY." ~Anne Frank~ "Things do not change, WE change." ~Henry David Thoreau~

06-11-2007, 04:25 AM	#2 (permalink)
2stop ~Author of My Life~ Join Date: May 2003 Location: Doing what I thought I couldn't.... Posts: 4,666	Tossed and turned all night. I hurt so bad this morning it is unreal. Tomorrow I see a specialist for some of my pain issues, maybe I'll sleep better aftre seeing him, and not talking to hubby on the phone before bed!
	__________________ Many Hugs and Hope too, Tammie "Think of all the beauty still left around you and BE HAPPY." ~Anne Frank~ "Things do not change, WE change." ~Henry David Thoreau~

06-25-2007, 07:26 PM	#3 (permalink)
*Morning Glory* Administrator Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: CA Posts: 1,193	How are you feeling Tammie? I've been thinking about you.
	__________________ Pro 11:14 Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counselors there is safety.

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