Love, Loss and Mourning. - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

In memory of miracle · 08-09-2005, 04:03 PM

I started a post about My Dad and some of the feelings I experienced with his loss. I have found that I would like to include other losses along with that post. I thought I would start a new post, and would be honored if others would share their expressions of grief along with mine. Poems written by others or yourselves. Stories about your loved ones that you might want to share. Anything at all that you might like to express on any given day about your grief or your journey.
Bless, Trish

In memory of miracle · 08-09-2005, 04:04 PM

The bustle in a house
The morning after death
Is solemnest of industries
Enacted upon earth, -
The sweeping up the heart,
And putting love away
We shall not want to use again
Until eternity.
Emily Dickinson (1830â€“86), American poet; from Complete Poems, 1925

Time2Surrender · 08-09-2005, 04:05 PM

(((Trish)))

In memory of miracle · 08-09-2005, 04:08 PM

((( Mikey )))

Feeling alright! Just an expression.There really are so many different beautiful poems and writings on it...Bless.

**Ann** · 08-09-2005, 04:30 PM

Trisha, although my son is alive, my grieving for him has taken another turn. It's been a process, grieving for the loss of him being around, grieving for the loss of his children, grieving for the loss of all the things about him that were so special, his warm smile, his kind ways, his hugs and maybe most of all his sense of humour.

I was cleaning out some old stuff in my computer the other night, and I came across some poems I had written a long time ago, and this was one of them. I am usually very private about my writing and poems, but I think I'd like to share this one.

The Addict

He stands alone in the dim unlit street, waiting for the angel of life - or death - to deliver his release.

Knowing that soon Nirvana will be his and peace will enshroud him.

He is poor, dirty, tired - a ragged person who has lost all hope of recovering his once treasured dream.

Despair, pain and too many memories will soon be replaced by calm, power and drug induced serenity, if only for a brief period before depression and disgust set in once again.

He is a living, feeling person, not unlike you and me.

He is my son - God help him.

AMS
1998

Gabe · 08-09-2005, 04:50 PM

I'm still hoping for the Angel of Life Ann, I really am.

Trish, I like this one.
I believe that those who have left us physically are still around spritually.
Me I know this, because I see my Dad every once in a while, when I'm really paying attention.
He's that butterfly that walks with me, or the sunlight in the trees out back.
Sometimes, he's a star in the night sky, winking at me.

"Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glint on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you wake in the morning hush,
I am the swift, uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft starlight at night.

Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there, I did not die."

Time2Surrender · 08-09-2005, 06:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by miraclen2003

((( Mikey )))

Feeling alright! Just an expression.There really are so many different beautiful poems and writings on it...Bless.

Im glad to hear that trish.I wasnt sure.

In memory of miracle · 08-09-2005, 06:31 PM

((( Ann )))
Thank-you for sharing,that is one powerful writing.Ann, like Gabe I believe in the Angel of life. I never thought I would get sober and clean again, and here I am, almost 2 yrs. later. I was all those things you described in your writing.Recovery is possible.You are a remarable woman Ann.
Bless,Trish

In memory of miracle · 08-09-2005, 06:54 PM

The Rose Beyond The Wall

A rose once grew where all could see,
sheltered beside a garden wall.
And, as the days passed swiftly by,
it spread its branches, straight and tall.

One day, a beam of light shone through
a crevice that had opened wide.
The rose bent gently toward its warmth
then passed beyond to the other side.

Now, you who deeply feel its loss,
be comforted, the rose blooms there.
Its beauty even greater now,
nurtured by God's own loving care.
~Author unknown

cynical one · 08-09-2005, 07:02 PM

I lost my mom March 7th this year. This poem was written by her 13 year old neighbor.

When I think of you,
I remember the games we played in your pool.
You were always the reigning champion of water basketball.
As the light reflected off the water you would squint.
Using your golden brown hand as a sun visor you would shoot a basket.
Swish.
You'd never miss.
On snowy days I would come to your back door after helping Snow Blow your driveway.
You would welcome me with hot chocolate and Tell me how you thought there would be another day off.
What I remember most is how you looked when you were listening to me.
With your eyes wide open and your lips with your pink lipstick would smile.
You would respond and then we would laugh.
We were not related.
Though it was never said we thought of you as family.
Your not with us now but You will always be in our hearts.
Love, Laura

In memory of miracle · 08-09-2005, 07:21 PM

What a beautiful tribute to your Mom, and from a 13 yr old! Your Mom sounds like she was really special. So sorry for your loss. I lost my Mom 10yrs. ago,I still miss her everyday.
Bless, Trish

deedee · 08-09-2005, 07:26 PM

(((Trish)))

Thank you for starting this ... I've been pretty low lately.

My son wrote the poem below. We included it at his service and it will be on his headstone someday. It so describes how I felt the first time he was placed in my arms and my yearning to keep him with me always.

Only Forever

I pulled you down from the clouds.
I had never known true perfection.
Now that you are here,
Please stay awhile.
I promise not to keep you very long,
Only forever ...

**Ann** · 08-09-2005, 07:35 PM

That's beautiful, Deedee. Such a special child with a very special mother.

You're in my thoughts and prayers every day.

Hugs and Love
Ann

In memory of miracle · 08-09-2005, 07:44 PM

I will never forget your beautiful tribute for your son on his birthday,and I think about you and him quiet often. One of my best friend's,who also happened to be my sister in law, committed suicide. I cant even describe the pain and shock I felt at the time.I also lost a cousin in the same way.
They call us "survivors", but I believe our loved one's want more for us then to just survive,I believe they want us to go on with our lives and be as happy as we can be,after something like that. I am not a big Bible reader, but I do enjoy certain passages,this is one of my favorites:

To everything there is a season,
a time for every purpose under the sun.
A time to be born and a time to die;
a time to plant and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
a time to kill and a time to heal ...
a time to weep and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn and a time to dance ...
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing;
a time to lose and a time to seek;
a time to rend and a time to sew;
a time to keep silent and a time to speak;
a time to love and a time to hate;
a time for war and a time for peace.

ecclesiastes 3:1-8
You are in my thoughts and prayers.Please continue to post.Thank you for sharing your journey...
Bless, Trish

In memory of miracle · 08-10-2005, 04:37 AM

Prayer for Those Who Mourn

Bless those who mourn, eternal God,
with the comfort of your love
that they may face each new day with hope
and the certainty that nothing can destroy
the good that has been given. May their memories become joyful,
their days enriched with friendship,
and their lives encircled by your love.
Amen.
((( DeeDee ))) Thinking of you.

- Vienna Cobb Anderson

**Ann** · 08-10-2005, 05:16 AM

Amen, Trish. May those who mourn know that the love of many encircles them in comfort and understanding, and may they find peace.

Hugs
Ann

na4today · 08-10-2005, 09:27 AM

Death is only an old door
Set in a garden wall.
On quiet hinges it gives at dusk,
When the thrushes call.

Along the lintel are green leaves,
Beyond the light lies still;
Very weary and willing feet
Go over that sill.

There is nothing to trouble any heart,
Nothing to hurt at all.
Death is only an old door
In a garden wall.

Nancy Byrd Turner

na4today · 08-10-2005, 09:29 AM

Every blade in the field
Every leaf in the forest
Lays down its life in its season
As beautifully as
It was taken up

Henry david Thoreau

best · 08-10-2005, 09:45 AM

No poems, no hand written songs, just a collection of memories and a gratefulness that the good memories outshine and cover over any negative memories.

Time does a wonderful job of getting the good memories to the top of the pile.

In memory of miracle · 08-10-2005, 03:14 PM

((( Kath ))) Those are wonderful.

((( Best ))) I think what you said says it all. Time does do a wonderful job. My Dad died when I was active, for a while I was really tortured with guilt and regret,than one day, a good memory.When I was little my Dad would take us out by boat to an island. I remembered how much fun it was and how much he loved us.I still struggle,but not near as much as I did. To be honest, I didnt believe the grief would ever end or maybe I should say "change" but with help and support it has.Bless, Trish

na4today · 08-12-2005, 09:09 AM

Come To Me

God saw that she was tired,
and a cure was not to be.
So he wrapped his arms around her,
and he whispered "Come to Me".
With tearful eyes he watched her suffer,
and slowly fade away.
Although we loved her dearly,
we could not make her stay.
A golden heart stopped beating,
strong hands were laid to rest.
God broke my heart to prove to me
He only takes the best.

Author Unknown

In memory of my Grandma Pauline

In memory of miracle · 08-12-2005, 11:49 AM

Yes he does...A Reflection upon a Life. I am standing upon that foreshore. A ship at my side spreads her white sails in the morning breeze and starts for the blue ocean. She is an object of beauty and strength, and I stand and watch her until at length she hangs like a speck of white cloud just where the sea and the sky come to mingle with each other. Then someone at my side says There Sheâ€™s Gone! Gone where? Gone from my sight, thatâ€™s all. She is just as large in mast and spar and hull as ever she was when she left my side; just as able to bear her load of living freight to the place of her destination. Her diminished size is in me, not in her. And just at that moment when someone at my side says there! Sheâ€™s gone! There are other eyes watching her coming and other voices ready to take up the glad shout, here she comes! And that is dying -Victor Hugo....

**Pony** · 08-13-2005, 11:56 PM

Thank you for this thread. I lost my father just last week...Thurs. Aug. 4 th 2005. As After a couple of days I was just peeking through the forums and kept seeing this thread on the main page, but also kept passing it up feeling as if I just couldn't come in a read it. But it kept calling to me.

Right now I just feel like a little girl that wants her daddy back, but as a grown woman I know that this is all a part of life and that he is now free of the physical pain that he felt in his daily life. We talked nightly and met once a week for lunch, plus other family get togethers. We are a close net family, but life, schedules, and children kept us from doing more together.

My father was a kind caring man. He was always helping someone.....anyone who needed him. He was not very good about managing money or doing what he should have to take healthy care of himself, but he was a good man who cared about the simplest of God's creatures to a neighbor who just needs to hold a hand while going through a scarey medical procedure in the hosp.

He loved to cook and share dinner with whomever stopped by.

There is so much more to my dad but yet he was a simple man who just loved life and a great big hug. He's the only grown man I ever knew that collected and kept teddy bears in his home.....they were his favorite.

I am missing him already.

Wolfstarr · 08-14-2005, 05:26 AM

((((Pony))))
We miss our loved ones. That never changes, although it gets bearable after time.

This past week, I visited the grave of my sister-in-law. She died in 1980. She was 31 years old when she died, in a car accident. She also lost the baby she was carrying and was full term and due any day.
Heart wrenching and sad, they were buried together. It gave my brother great comfort, though and that is what mattered.
It has been twenty-five years.
The pain is no less. Only bearable and not in our constant thoughts.

Visiting the gravesite brought back that pain. But it also brought back some great memories and the love for her that continues in my heart. That will never go away.

(((NA4today))) (((Miraclen))) (((Pony))))
Thank you for sharing your feelings here. I can relate and so need to hear them.
Love to you all.

In memory of miracle · 08-14-2005, 06:05 AM

I am so sorry about your Dad. He sounds like, well a great human being. I am so glad that you came in and posted about your loss. I have been trying to " avoid " mine for years.I am in a womans therapy group and there has been alot of sharing about grief, and I tried to quit the group!
I "know" loss is a part of life,but for me, it's been difficult to share about.It has been a slow process for me, but I think I am finally getting some acceptance and peace about it.Most days, even though my parents are gone in body, I know their spirit is still here with me. They are always in my heart, and once inawhile I get alittle "sign" from them.
I was thinking of a memory yesterday. I work in a cafe now and I was pouring out the hazelnut coffee,I thought of my Dad. How he hated hazelnut !I had to smile...We usto sit and have coffee after he would pick me up from work.When I was sober coffee was our "thing". He would say I just had a cup of that McDonald's coffee and boy am I zooted up!
My dad's humor was great.Thats what I remember today. Thanks for letting me go on...
Blessed are those who mourn...Trish
.

08-09-2005, 04:03 PM	#1 (permalink)
In memory of miracle In Memory Of Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Connecticut. Posts: 3,738	Love, Loss and Mourning. I started a post about My Dad and some of the feelings I experienced with his loss. I have found that I would like to include other losses along with that post. I thought I would start a new post, and would be honored if others would share their expressions of grief along with mine. Poems written by others or yourselves. Stories about your loved ones that you might want to share. Anything at all that you might like to express on any given day about your grief or your journey. Bless, Trish __________________ In Memory Of Teach only love...

08-09-2005, 04:04 PM	#2 (permalink)
In memory of miracle In Memory Of Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Connecticut. Posts: 3,738	The bustle in a house The morning after death Is solemnest of industries Enacted upon earth, - The sweeping up the heart, And putting love away We shall not want to use again Until eternity. Emily Dickinson (1830â€“86), American poet; from Complete Poems, 1925 __________________ In Memory Of Teach only love...

08-09-2005, 04:08 PM	#4 (permalink)
In memory of miracle In Memory Of Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Connecticut. Posts: 3,738	((( Mikey ))) Feeling alright! Just an expression.There really are so many different beautiful poems and writings on it...Bless. __________________ In Memory Of Teach only love...

08-09-2005, 04:30 PM	#5 (permalink)
Ann Forum Leader Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: By The Lake Posts: 25,227	Trisha, although my son is alive, my grieving for him has taken another turn. It's been a process, grieving for the loss of him being around, grieving for the loss of his children, grieving for the loss of all the things about him that were so special, his warm smile, his kind ways, his hugs and maybe most of all his sense of humour. I was cleaning out some old stuff in my computer the other night, and I came across some poems I had written a long time ago, and this was one of them. I am usually very private about my writing and poems, but I think I'd like to share this one. The Addict He stands alone in the dim unlit street, waiting for the angel of life - or death - to deliver his release. Knowing that soon Nirvana will be his and peace will enshroud him. He is poor, dirty, tired - a ragged person who has lost all hope of recovering his once treasured dream. Despair, pain and too many memories will soon be replaced by calm, power and drug induced serenity, if only for a brief period before depression and disgust set in once again. He is a living, feeling person, not unlike you and me. He is my son - God help him. AMS 1998 __________________ “Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” ~Winnie the Pooh~

08-09-2005, 06:31 PM	#8 (permalink)
In memory of miracle In Memory Of Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Connecticut. Posts: 3,738	((( Ann ))) Thank-you for sharing,that is one powerful writing.Ann, like Gabe I believe in the Angel of life. I never thought I would get sober and clean again, and here I am, almost 2 yrs. later. I was all those things you described in your writing.Recovery is possible.You are a remarable woman Ann. Bless,Trish __________________ In Memory Of Teach only love...

08-09-2005, 04:05 PM	#3 (permalink)
Time2Surrender Member Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Washington State Posts: 7,263 Blog Entries: 7	(((Trish)))

08-09-2005, 04:50 PM	#6 (permalink)
Gabe Member Join Date: Jan 2003 Posts: 4,955	I'm still hoping for the Angel of Life Ann, I really am. Trish, I like this one. I believe that those who have left us physically are still around spritually. Me I know this, because I see my Dad every once in a while, when I'm really paying attention. He's that butterfly that walks with me, or the sunlight in the trees out back. Sometimes, he's a star in the night sky, winking at me. "Do not stand at my grave and weep, I am not there, I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glint on snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain. I am the gentle autumn rain. When you wake in the morning hush, I am the swift, uplifting rush Of quiet birds in circling flight. I am the soft starlight at night. Do not stand at my grave and weep. I am not there, I do not sleep. Do not stand at my grave and cry. I am not there, I did not die."

08-09-2005, 06:54 PM	#9 (permalink)
In memory of miracle In Memory Of Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Connecticut. Posts: 3,738	The Rose Beyond The Wall A rose once grew where all could see, sheltered beside a garden wall. And, as the days passed swiftly by, it spread its branches, straight and tall. One day, a beam of light shone through a crevice that had opened wide. The rose bent gently toward its warmth then passed beyond to the other side. Now, you who deeply feel its loss, be comforted, the rose blooms there. Its beauty even greater now, nurtured by God's own loving care. ~Author unknown __________________ In Memory Of Teach only love...

08-09-2005, 07:02 PM	#10 (permalink)
cynical one Member Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 2,452 Blog Entries: 194	I lost my mom March 7th this year. This poem was written by her 13 year old neighbor. When I think of you, I remember the games we played in your pool. You were always the reigning champion of water basketball. As the light reflected off the water you would squint. Using your golden brown hand as a sun visor you would shoot a basket. Swish. You'd never miss. On snowy days I would come to your back door after helping Snow Blow your driveway. You would welcome me with hot chocolate and Tell me how you thought there would be another day off. What I remember most is how you looked when you were listening to me. With your eyes wide open and your lips with your pink lipstick would smile. You would respond and then we would laugh. We were not related. Though it was never said we thought of you as family. Your not with us now but You will always be in our hearts. Love, Laura<!--webbot BOT="FormInsertHere" --><!--webbot BOT="Include" U-Include="../_borders/disc2_aftr.htm" startspan -->

08-09-2005, 07:21 PM	#11 (permalink)
In memory of miracle In Memory Of Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Connecticut. Posts: 3,738	What a beautiful tribute to your Mom, and from a 13 yr old! Your Mom sounds like she was really special. So sorry for your loss. I lost my Mom 10yrs. ago,I still miss her everyday. Bless, Trish __________________ In Memory Of Teach only love...

08-09-2005, 07:26 PM	#12 (permalink)
deedee Member Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Faith~Hope~Love Posts: 933	(((Trish))) Thank you for starting this ... I've been pretty low lately. My son wrote the poem below. We included it at his service and it will be on his headstone someday. It so describes how I felt the first time he was placed in my arms and my yearning to keep him with me always. Only Forever I pulled you down from the clouds. I had never known true perfection. Now that you are here, Please stay awhile. I promise not to keep you very long, Only forever ... __________________ ~ While the light lasts I shall remember and in the darkness I shall not forget ~

08-09-2005, 07:35 PM	#13 (permalink)
Ann Forum Leader Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: By The Lake Posts: 25,227	That's beautiful, Deedee. Such a special child with a very special mother. You're in my thoughts and prayers every day. Hugs and Love Ann __________________ “Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” ~Winnie the Pooh~

08-09-2005, 07:44 PM	#14 (permalink)
In memory of miracle In Memory Of Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Connecticut. Posts: 3,738	((( DeeDee ))) I will never forget your beautiful tribute for your son on his birthday,and I think about you and him quiet often. One of my best friend's,who also happened to be my sister in law, committed suicide. I cant even describe the pain and shock I felt at the time.I also lost a cousin in the same way. They call us "survivors", but I believe our loved one's want more for us then to just survive,I believe they want us to go on with our lives and be as happy as we can be,after something like that. I am not a big Bible reader, but I do enjoy certain passages,this is one of my favorites: To everything there is a season, a time for every purpose under the sun. A time to be born and a time to die; a time to plant and a time to pluck up that which is planted; a time to kill and a time to heal ... a time to weep and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a time to dance ... a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to lose and a time to seek; a time to rend and a time to sew; a time to keep silent and a time to speak; a time to love and a time to hate; a time for war and a time for peace. ecclesiastes 3:1-8 You are in my thoughts and prayers.Please continue to post.Thank you for sharing your journey... Bless, Trish __________________ In Memory Of Teach only love...

08-10-2005, 04:37 AM	#15 (permalink)
In memory of miracle In Memory Of Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Connecticut. Posts: 3,738	Prayer for Those Who Mourn Bless those who mourn, eternal God, with the comfort of your love that they may face each new day with hope and the certainty that nothing can destroy the good that has been given. May their memories become joyful, their days enriched with friendship, and their lives encircled by your love. Amen. ((( DeeDee ))) Thinking of you. - Vienna Cobb Anderson __________________ In Memory Of Teach only love...

08-10-2005, 05:16 AM	#16 (permalink)
Ann Forum Leader Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: By The Lake Posts: 25,227	Amen, Trish. May those who mourn know that the love of many encircles them in comfort and understanding, and may they find peace. Hugs Ann __________________ “Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” ~Winnie the Pooh~

08-10-2005, 09:27 AM	#17 (permalink)
na4today Learning as I go Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 731	Death is only an old door Set in a garden wall. On quiet hinges it gives at dusk, When the thrushes call. Along the lintel are green leaves, Beyond the light lies still; Very weary and willing feet Go over that sill. There is nothing to trouble any heart, Nothing to hurt at all. Death is only an old door In a garden wall. Nancy Byrd Turner __________________ I waited patiently for God to help me; then he listened to me and heard my cry -Psalm 40:1 Take my will and my life Guide me in my recovery Show me how to live Just for today Clean Date 8/20/05

08-10-2005, 09:29 AM	#18 (permalink)
na4today Learning as I go Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 731	Every blade in the field Every leaf in the forest Lays down its life in its season As beautifully as It was taken up Henry david Thoreau __________________ I waited patiently for God to help me; then he listened to me and heard my cry -Psalm 40:1 Take my will and my life Guide me in my recovery Show me how to live Just for today Clean Date 8/20/05

08-10-2005, 09:45 AM	#19 (permalink)
best Don't get undies in a bunch Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: South Shore MA Posts: 7,166	No poems, no hand written songs, just a collection of memories and a gratefulness that the good memories outshine and cover over any negative memories. Time does a wonderful job of getting the good memories to the top of the pile. __________________ * I asked God to spare me pain. God said "No", Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares and brings you closer to me. Recovery Related Acronym B. E. S. T. = Been Enjoying Sobriety Today?

08-10-2005, 03:14 PM	#20 (permalink)
In memory of miracle In Memory Of Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Connecticut. Posts: 3,738	((( Kath ))) Those are wonderful. ((( Best ))) I think what you said says it all. Time does do a wonderful job. My Dad died when I was active, for a while I was really tortured with guilt and regret,than one day, a good memory.When I was little my Dad would take us out by boat to an island. I remembered how much fun it was and how much he loved us.I still struggle,but not near as much as I did. To be honest, I didnt believe the grief would ever end or maybe I should say "change" but with help and support it has.Bless, Trish __________________ In Memory Of Teach only love...

08-12-2005, 09:09 AM	#21 (permalink)
na4today Learning as I go Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 731	Come To Me God saw that she was tired, and a cure was not to be. So he wrapped his arms around her, and he whispered "Come to Me". With tearful eyes he watched her suffer, and slowly fade away. Although we loved her dearly, we could not make her stay. A golden heart stopped beating, strong hands were laid to rest. God broke my heart to prove to me He only takes the best. Author Unknown In memory of my Grandma Pauline __________________ I waited patiently for God to help me; then he listened to me and heard my cry -Psalm 40:1 Take my will and my life Guide me in my recovery Show me how to live Just for today Clean Date 8/20/05

08-12-2005, 11:49 AM	#22 (permalink)
In memory of miracle In Memory Of Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Connecticut. Posts: 3,738	(( Na4 )) Yes he does...A Reflection upon a Life. I am standing upon that foreshore. A ship at my side spreads her white sails in the morning breeze and starts for the blue ocean. She is an object of beauty and strength, and I stand and watch her until at length she hangs like a speck of white cloud just where the sea and the sky come to mingle with each other. Then someone at my side says There Sheâ€™s Gone! Gone where? Gone from my sight, thatâ€™s all. She is just as large in mast and spar and hull as ever she was when she left my side; just as able to bear her load of living freight to the place of her destination. Her diminished size is in me, not in her. And just at that moment when someone at my side says there! Sheâ€™s gone! There are other eyes watching her coming and other voices ready to take up the glad shout, here she comes! And that is dying -Victor Hugo.... __________________ In Memory Of Teach only love...

08-13-2005, 11:56 PM	#23 (permalink)
Pony Forum Leader Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: trail of discovery Posts: 2,480	Thank you for this thread. I lost my father just last week...Thurs. Aug. 4 th 2005. As After a couple of days I was just peeking through the forums and kept seeing this thread on the main page, but also kept passing it up feeling as if I just couldn't come in a read it. But it kept calling to me. Right now I just feel like a little girl that wants her daddy back, but as a grown woman I know that this is all a part of life and that he is now free of the physical pain that he felt in his daily life. We talked nightly and met once a week for lunch, plus other family get togethers. We are a close net family, but life, schedules, and children kept us from doing more together. My father was a kind caring man. He was always helping someone.....anyone who needed him. He was not very good about managing money or doing what he should have to take healthy care of himself, but he was a good man who cared about the simplest of God's creatures to a neighbor who just needs to hold a hand while going through a scarey medical procedure in the hosp. He loved to cook and share dinner with whomever stopped by. There is so much more to my dad but yet he was a simple man who just loved life and a great big hug. He's the only grown man I ever knew that collected and kept teddy bears in his home.....they were his favorite. I am missing him already. __________________ "Failure is an EVENT, it is not a person â€“ yesterday really did end last night, and today is your brand new day..." .........unknown The sun always rises, and a new day begins.

08-14-2005, 05:26 AM	#24 (permalink)
Wolfstarr Member Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Deeeep South Posts: 767	((((Pony)))) We miss our loved ones. That never changes, although it gets bearable after time. This past week, I visited the grave of my sister-in-law. She died in 1980. She was 31 years old when she died, in a car accident. She also lost the baby she was carrying and was full term and due any day. Heart wrenching and sad, they were buried together. It gave my brother great comfort, though and that is what mattered. It has been twenty-five years. The pain is no less. Only bearable and not in our constant thoughts. Visiting the gravesite brought back that pain. But it also brought back some great memories and the love for her that continues in my heart. That will never go away. (((NA4today))) (((Miraclen))) (((Pony)))) Thank you for sharing your feelings here. I can relate and so need to hear them. Love to you all. __________________

08-14-2005, 06:05 AM	#25 (permalink)
In memory of miracle In Memory Of Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Connecticut. Posts: 3,738	((( Pony ))) I am so sorry about your Dad. He sounds like, well a great human being. I am so glad that you came in and posted about your loss. I have been trying to " avoid " mine for years.I am in a womans therapy group and there has been alot of sharing about grief, and I tried to quit the group! I "know" loss is a part of life,but for me, it's been difficult to share about.It has been a slow process for me, but I think I am finally getting some acceptance and peace about it.Most days, even though my parents are gone in body, I know their spirit is still here with me. They are always in my heart, and once inawhile I get alittle "sign" from them. I was thinking of a memory yesterday. I work in a cafe now and I was pouring out the hazelnut coffee,I thought of my Dad. How he hated hazelnut !I had to smile...We usto sit and have coffee after he would pick me up from work.When I was sober coffee was our "thing". He would say I just had a cup of that McDonald's coffee and boy am I zooted up! My dad's humor was great.Thats what I remember today. Thanks for letting me go on... Blessed are those who mourn...Trish . __________________ In Memory Of Teach only love...

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