Four year sadanniversary coming up - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

sophiamarie2007 · 11-29-2011, 04:09 PM

It's been almost four years since my husband died from suicide. He was an addict, like me-he just couldn't cope with life on life terms. It still takes my breath away and brings me to my knees thinking about the day I found him dead. It's harder now that I am clean to cope with all the emotions surrounding his death. He left a 3 month old, 3 year old and four year old without a father. Sometimes I wonder if his addiction caused his suicide or his untreated depression . They seemed to go hand in hand. His death helped me to spiral with my addiction to the point that it got out of control. (I am not blaming his death, I just used it as a crunch to use more. not to feel-to go on with life and raising kids. The drugs made me feel like supermom that could handle anything. Now that I am naked off the drugs, I feel all these emotions surrounding his death coming up and hitting me. thanks for listening.
'

**Impurrfect** · 11-29-2011, 04:58 PM

(((SophiaMarie))) - so sorry for your loss. Yes, it is hard when we start dealing with it, and feel all the emotions we've buried in our addictions. It is painful, but the pain does ease over time..I don't know that it ever goes away, but I do think it gets farther and farther between the times when we feel like we've been punched in the gut.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

**MsPINKAcres** · 11-30-2011, 01:31 PM

prayers of peace and comfort for you as you remember that painful time

I pray that now you continue your path on this road of recovery ~ realizing what a healthy gift you are giving yourself and your loved ones!

PINK HUGS,
Rita

11-29-2011, 04:09 PM	#1 (permalink)
sophiamarie2007 Member Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: parkersburg, wv Posts: 172	Four year sadanniversary coming up It's been almost four years since my husband died from suicide. He was an addict, like me-he just couldn't cope with life on life terms. It still takes my breath away and brings me to my knees thinking about the day I found him dead. It's harder now that I am clean to cope with all the emotions surrounding his death. He left a 3 month old, 3 year old and four year old without a father. Sometimes I wonder if his addiction caused his suicide or his untreated depression . They seemed to go hand in hand. His death helped me to spiral with my addiction to the point that it got out of control. (I am not blaming his death, I just used it as a crunch to use more. not to feel-to go on with life and raising kids. The drugs made me feel like supermom that could handle anything. Now that I am naked off the drugs, I feel all these emotions surrounding his death coming up and hitting me. thanks for listening. '

11-29-2011, 04:58 PM	#2 (permalink)
Impurrfect Social Network Moderator Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Atlanta Posts: 25,171	(((SophiaMarie))) - so sorry for your loss. Yes, it is hard when we start dealing with it, and feel all the emotions we've buried in our addictions. It is painful, but the pain does ease over time..I don't know that it ever goes away, but I do think it gets farther and farther between the times when we feel like we've been punched in the gut. Hugs and prayers, Amy __________________ "I'm not where I want to be, but thank God I'm not where I used to be" - Joyce Meyer "You got what it takes you can win, today is your day to begin. - Shania Twain (Tinker, Elvis [RIP], Patches and Mots - Mouth Of The South)

11-30-2011, 01:31 PM	#3 (permalink)
MsPINKAcres Living in a Pinkful Place Join Date: May 2006 Location: Louisiana Posts: 6,998	prayers of peace and comfort for you as you remember that painful time I pray that now you continue your path on this road of recovery ~ realizing what a healthy gift you are giving yourself and your loved ones! PINK HUGS, Rita __________________ ". . . let the understanding, love and peace of the program grow in you One Day at a Time." From the Al-Anon Suggested Closing It is very difficult to have a pity party when celebrating all the gratitude I have in my life!

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)