Having a Bad Day - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

DJMH · 10-02-2008, 10:34 AM

For that matter a very bad week.

So I came home from work last Friday and discovered that my wife took the kids, the dog, her stuff and left me. I had only then realized that this was planned for sometime. I couldnt see it, because of my alcoholism.

Tomorrow will be one week. I have moved out of the rental home we shared, she having already done that on that fateful Friday. She did take most of the stuff, but left somethings that she could use. Dishes, silverware, glasses, cups etc. Even the food in the fridge.

Now....I am going to be cleaning a lot of that out of there on Saturday. I ran into her this past Monday completely by accident, as we live in a small town. I asked her about the food, dishes etc...and she said she didnt want them, that she can buy new dishes. We dont have a lot of money. She did state there isnt another man, and I figured that. She is not one to have thoughts like that at this time. I am worried for her and the kids, so I called my Attorney and asked him to contact her Attorney to get that stuff.

And that was when my day went from eh ok to worse. As I go thru this process, all of these finalizing steps are going to just kill my soul.

After I got off the phone, I started to cry. If I were not at work, I am sure I would have pulled the plug from the jug. And I am very worried about after work. Tonight will be my 6th AA meeting.

I am so depressed. I dont know where my kids are. I never got to say goodbye. My therapist tells me that for me it is alot like dealing with a death.

And I cant help but feel that I am responsible.

I was doing really well yesterday too. I am so depressed. I dont know what to do!

DJMH · 10-02-2008, 10:39 AM

Oh and my son's birthday is next Tuesday.

bluerskies · 10-02-2008, 01:58 PM

If you can look at this as just a part of your journey -- maybe that will help. This is not the end of your story, only a part of it. Wishing you strength right now.

1963comet · 10-02-2008, 02:12 PM

I sure hope things will get better for you. Just staying sober I found my life getting better. It did not happen over night but it did happen.

I lost everything including my family and home. So, I know what you are going through.

indigo · 10-03-2008, 02:17 AM

Get clean and it clears the fog in your mind and enables you to start making plans for how you wish to live jmo.

seiko · 02-22-2009, 01:13 PM

Hi djmh
I have had my fair share of $hit, probaly more. But, this is the first year I am having to face many of ny ghosts whilst being sober. It's a lot easier on the brain.
My problems now do not seem so overpowering.

I am sure your wife will be more caring as sobriety is prolonged - keep it up.

Rainbowsend · 04-11-2009, 07:45 PM

This could be the kindest gift she ever gives you, please keep with the programme so you can keep a relationship with your children xxx

Angelic17 · 04-11-2009, 07:54 PM

If you get better, you will be able to have a relationship with your wife and children again. Hang on, things will get better. Just don't pick up that drink.

9ainigriv7 · 04-12-2009, 01:24 AM

DJMH,

Just stay close to the fellowship it will help you to get by in your times of need also another suggestion would be to try to find a much higher strength beyond human aide that you can rely on to carry you thru the pain. You can do this your not alone. We are here for you. The disease of alcholism is cunning, balfing, and powerful. This disease wants us dead and it will keep taking from us if we allow it to. If you don't pick up that first drink you have a fighting chance. It will get difficult but please give yourself a chance and don't give up on yourself and remember to call those you meet in the fellowship they are there to help you thru for they understand where you are at, for they have all been there due to this disease. We can get better if we give ourselves a break. You can do this!

10-02-2008, 10:34 AM	#1 (permalink)
DJMH Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 37	Having a Bad Day For that matter a very bad week. So I came home from work last Friday and discovered that my wife took the kids, the dog, her stuff and left me. I had only then realized that this was planned for sometime. I couldnt see it, because of my alcoholism. Tomorrow will be one week. I have moved out of the rental home we shared, she having already done that on that fateful Friday. She did take most of the stuff, but left somethings that she could use. Dishes, silverware, glasses, cups etc. Even the food in the fridge. Now....I am going to be cleaning a lot of that out of there on Saturday. I ran into her this past Monday completely by accident, as we live in a small town. I asked her about the food, dishes etc...and she said she didnt want them, that she can buy new dishes. We dont have a lot of money. She did state there isnt another man, and I figured that. She is not one to have thoughts like that at this time. I am worried for her and the kids, so I called my Attorney and asked him to contact her Attorney to get that stuff. And that was when my day went from eh ok to worse. As I go thru this process, all of these finalizing steps are going to just kill my soul. After I got off the phone, I started to cry. If I were not at work, I am sure I would have pulled the plug from the jug. And I am very worried about after work. Tonight will be my 6th AA meeting. I am so depressed. I dont know where my kids are. I never got to say goodbye. My therapist tells me that for me it is alot like dealing with a death. And I cant help but feel that I am responsible. I was doing really well yesterday too. I am so depressed. I dont know what to do!

10-02-2008, 01:58 PM	#3 (permalink)
bluerskies watching the clouds roll away Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: bliss Posts: 76	If you can look at this as just a part of your journey -- maybe that will help. This is not the end of your story, only a part of it. Wishing you strength right now. __________________ In memory of Mike, brilliant artist, loyal friend, beloved soul who passed away on September 11, 2008 from the disease of addiction. If you are lost please take this chance to go to a meeting today or ask someone for help.

10-02-2008, 02:12 PM	#4 (permalink)
1963comet Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Michigan Posts: 1,381	I sure hope things will get better for you. Just staying sober I found my life getting better. It did not happen over night but it did happen. I lost everything including my family and home. So, I know what you are going through. __________________ Just Maybe... It is true that we do not know what we have until we lose it, But it is also true we do not know what we have been missing until it Arrives.

10-03-2008, 02:17 AM	#5 (permalink)
indigo Community Greeter Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Mid-Life Express Posts: 9,928	Get clean and it clears the fog in your mind and enables you to start making plans for how you wish to live jmo. __________________ When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself." Namasté

04-11-2009, 07:54 PM	#8 (permalink)
Angelic17 Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Earth Posts: 1,258 Blog Entries: 12	If you get better, you will be able to have a relationship with your wife and children again. Hang on, things will get better. Just don't pick up that drink. __________________ Love the addict Hate the disease If you think you can, Or if you think you can't Either way your right.

10-02-2008, 10:39 AM	#2 (permalink)
DJMH Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 37	Oh and my son's birthday is next Tuesday.

02-22-2009, 01:13 PM	#6 (permalink)
seiko Member Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 14	Hi djmh I have had my fair share of $hit, probaly more. But, this is the first year I am having to face many of ny ghosts whilst being sober. It's a lot easier on the brain. My problems now do not seem so overpowering. I am sure your wife will be more caring as sobriety is prolonged - keep it up.

04-11-2009, 07:45 PM	#7 (permalink)
Rainbowsend Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: London Posts: 220	This could be the kindest gift she ever gives you, please keep with the programme so you can keep a relationship with your children xxx

04-12-2009, 01:24 AM	#9 (permalink)
9ainigriv7 Member Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Fall River, MA Posts: 9	DJMH, Just stay close to the fellowship it will help you to get by in your times of need also another suggestion would be to try to find a much higher strength beyond human aide that you can rely on to carry you thru the pain. You can do this your not alone. We are here for you. The disease of alcholism is cunning, balfing, and powerful. This disease wants us dead and it will keep taking from us if we allow it to. If you don't pick up that first drink you have a fighting chance. It will get difficult but please give yourself a chance and don't give up on yourself and remember to call those you meet in the fellowship they are there to help you thru for they understand where you are at, for they have all been there due to this disease. We can get better if we give ourselves a break. You can do this!

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