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Old 05-12-2008, 11:21 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Posts: 184
Dad is now gone.

My dad passed away on Dec 21st. It was a good thing for him. 5 years ago, he was a very young 78 yrs old. Looked like he was in his early sixties, jogged everyday, ate right, quit smoking decades before, etc. 5 years later he was a very old 83. Parkinsons Disease. He told my Mom a year ago he didn’t really want to be here anymore. He refused a wheelchair, using a cane and a foot brace built into his shoe. He fell, broke his arm. While in the phys therapy place, he caught the flu, which turned into preumonia, which turned into a vicious infection which finally took him out.

I am very fortunate in that I got sober 6 years ago. I made my official 9th step amends to him face to face in October, two months before. I don't believe in coincidences anymore, not now that I'm sober anyway.

We’re all doing fine as far as I can see. A lot of acceptance and a lot of love and support for each other. All my friends have been great as well, just really there if I need them. Thanks everyone, it means everything.

I just have to give my Mom tremendous respect - she was a 24/7 Parkinsons nurse for 5 years, she was with my Dad for 48 years, she had two college degrees and worked and supported herself back in a time when most women didn’t. She used to live a quasi-bohemian life in Greenwich Village back in the Beat generation days. Worked at a political magazine. Gave it up to become a nurse, get married, and raise a family. To tell the story of my Dad’s final few days, though:

The entire family was at his bedside in the hospital in North Carolina. I guess he waited for everyone to get there before he passed. I offered him up to God with the help of an Episcopal Chaplain. He wouldn’t deteriorate very fast, and my Uncle Richard made the point blank declaration "you gotta shoot one of us".

We are pretty indestructible. My oldest brother Steve is recovering from Stage IV throat cancer, which not many people get to come back from. For myself, I drank enough booze and did enough dope to kill a lot of people when you consider Heath Ledger and so many others, people who never should have messed around with that stuff. I know it sounds hip, slick, and cool, but we are pretty indestructible. Most Brits are when it comes to hard living.

I have no plans to snort my dads ashes though.

Bye Pete, miss ya lots.

Dave

:praying
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Old 06-01-2008, 04:37 PM   #2 (permalink)
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god bless you, my thoughts are with you and your family
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