Im so thankful for...

[wishIsedNO]

Im so thankful for my first christmas with my family...
Even with the bad year we been having with my fathers drinking and him denial of it...
But for me and my recovery its been better then i could of ever expected...I never thought i would even get this far..If you would of told me 2 yrs ago i would laugh and say not me...
But im here thank god..And my reward if being able to wake up christmas morning and not be sick..I aint lock up in my room taking my morning hit of dope...I aint worrying about if my stash will last till the next day and how am i gonna get for the next...
Instead i awoke and went downstairs..healthy and happy..with my mom smiling and 3 presents waiting...And for the very first christmas i too had a present for her..and my sister..Even though it wasnt the nicest..Its the thought and what it means that matters..It showed my mom that im truely doing better..In the past i would of never bought her anything not even a card unless my sister bought it..cause it would take from my dope money..And i couldnt have that...
But this christmas is different..And im grateful for that...And i am also grateful for all the support i have found with everyone here and in my methadone program..I feel i dont deserve to be so lucky..But am glad i am...Thank you all..Jackie