Hi Randy, welcome to SR and our little corner of it.
Congrats on 33 years in your relationship. I always have to smile a little extra smile when I hear of long term LGBT relationships because one of the arguments people used to use against us was that we were incapable of maintaining long term relationships it was especially used against gay men. My partner and I have been together 12 years now.
Congrats on your 11 years sober time. We have right around the same time, I am sober 12 years. Yes, I did the big "no, no" and got involved early in sobriety and I have had to learn a lot along the way to not allow myself to make my sobriety dependent upon the status of my relationship. It has taken a lot of growth over the years but so far so good.
Quitting smoking, that one can be hard. My partner has struggled with it over the years. She just started back after having stopped for 9 years. She started with that one here and there thing. I quit smoking and drinking at the same time. For me they were intrinsically tied together the more I drank the more I smoked and the more I smoked the more I wanted a drink. So I knew that I had to quit both. I needed to though as I had started developing Emphysema and was getting pretty severe cases of Bronchitis every Winter.
I found sobriety after moving to Oregon from Arkansas and have been here every since. I love the state. It is quite beautiful and has enough variety to keep me busy. New York is on my bucket list of places to see. Once my partner can retire we hope to RV most of the year and see more of the Country. Right now our trips are limited because of time but we still have had the opportunity to explore a lot of Oregon and Washington and even a bit of Idaho.
Again hello, glad you are here.
NOTE: All BB quotes are from the 1st Edition of the Big Book
Depression is not a sign of weakness. It is a sign of being too strong for too long.