Hey! I'm new here.. - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

sexehshay · 11-07-2011, 02:26 PM

Hey,

I'm sitting here reading everyone's experience, strength, and hope tonight. I love that I found this forum or else I am not sure what would be wandering through my idle mind. I am 52 days clean today but I find myself to be very lonely. I had to change people, places, and things, how did everybody else deal with this change? I constantly am at the fellowships, speaking with my sponsor, going out with some of the girls that I met in the rooms, and my family. I just feel lonely and bored during the day.

***nandm*** · 11-07-2011, 02:55 PM

Welcome.

Congrats on your sober time.

Yes, early sobriety can be difficult fighting that boredom. I had trouble figuring out what to do with my time not drinking because everything I did before was with a drink in my hand. Life seemed really strange without it. It took a while for me learn how to do life without alcohol. When I got sober I had just moved over 2400 miles to be with someone I met and that relationship fell apart within 3 months leaving me in a city where I knew basically no one and had just started a new job all while trying to raise 3 children. So I do know what it is like in early sobriety to feel lonely and bored and at times scared.

What worked for me was going to a lot of AA meetings and reaching out to a lot of people. This is a good place to meet people, I am glad you reached out here. I took a lot of drives through the countryside. I am fortunate enough to live in a beautiful state no matter what season. I did a lot of hiking, I even took my friends dogs hiking with me while she was at work just so I did not have to go alone. I worked a lot. I read a lot. I did my Step work. All of that work paid off though as eventually those feelings of loneliness and boredom did pass.

Hang in there as you are not alone. Your life can get better and you can do it sober. Glad you are here reaching out and I hope you find the support and encouragement I have in these forums. Take care.

catallus · 11-07-2011, 04:09 PM

Hey now,

Many congrats on 52 days... It sounds like your meeting new friends in the program and building a network, good stuff, but what I also had to do was get to know myself.

Over the years I buried myself in drugs and booze and never knew who I was or even what I liked to do. So I do suggest reintroducing yourself to you. Once you know who you are and what you like, you'll be able to fill in those idle alone times.

For me, I had to develop a balanced program - program, work, play/social time, and alone time. It's all a balance.

Let us know how you're doin', keep pluggin' away - it is worth it.

sexehshay · 11-08-2011, 12:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nandm

Welcome.

Congrats on your sober time.

Yes, early sobriety can be difficult fighting that boredom. I had trouble figuring out what to do with my time not drinking because everything I did before was with a drink in my hand. Life seemed really strange without it. It took a while for me learn how to do life without alcohol. When I got sober I had just moved over 2400 miles to be with someone I met and that relationship fell apart within 3 months leaving me in a city where I knew basically no one and had just started a new job all while trying to raise 3 children. So I do know what it is like in early sobriety to feel lonely and bored and at times scared.

What worked for me was going to a lot of AA meetings and reaching out to a lot of people. This is a good place to meet people, I am glad you reached out here. I took a lot of drives through the countryside. I am fortunate enough to live in a beautiful state no matter what season. I did a lot of hiking, I even took my friends dogs hiking with me while she was at work just so I did not have to go alone. I worked a lot. I read a lot. I did my Step work. All of that work paid off though as eventually those feelings of loneliness and boredom did pass.

Hang in there as you are not alone. Your life can get better and you can do it sober. Glad you are here reaching out and I hope you find the support and encouragement I have in these forums. Take care.

Nandm,

I love AA, I meet a lot of good people in the rooms. I feel like they are my family and the only people that understand me at times. I am trying to hang in there as much as I can. I am having a little bit of a rough time today. My story is not so much alcohol as it is drugs. I am in so much pain, I barely want to move. I am not sure how to deal with the feelings of helplessness because I can no longer self medicate nor sit on the pity pot saying oh poor me. I am on suboxen for the cravings but it doesn't seen to be working as well as it did the first time I tried to get sober? I am sitting here contemplating whether to try the methadone route or not to. By the way thank you for the advice!!

sexehshay · 11-08-2011, 12:53 PM

Thanks Catallus,

I spend a lot of alone time trying to get to know me. I am trying to find new hobbies and I find myself reading more and more. I used to think that I hated to read (Go figure? LOL) In time I'm sure I'll figure out more and on the 23rd I start an intensive outpatient so I wont have so much idle time then and I'll even be able to get a job then. I am very excited!

***nandm*** · 11-08-2011, 02:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sexehshay

Thanks Catallus,

I spend a lot of alone time trying to get to know me. I am trying to find new hobbies and I find myself reading more and more. I used to think that I hated to read (Go figure? LOL) In time I'm sure I'll figure out more and on the 23rd I start an intensive outpatient so I wont have so much idle time then and I'll even be able to get a job then. I am very excited!

You should check out our Art: GLBT-themed multimedia thread, it has some good recommendations and reviews of different books. Personally, I enjoy reading Augusten Burroughs. I loved his book "Dry." Here is a link to the thread: http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ultimedia.html (Art: GLBT-themed multimedia)

catallus · 11-08-2011, 04:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nandm

You should check out our Art: GLBT-themed multimedia thread, it has some good recommendations and reviews of different books. Personally, I enjoy reading Augusten Burroughs. I loved his book "Dry." Here is a link to the thread: http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ultimedia.html (Art: GLBT-themed multimedia)

Thanx for the reminder nandm, I had forgotten about this thread. I haven't read any GLBT-themed books; I'll have to check out Burroughs and such...

sexehshay, by the 23rd, you'll have a good base of recovery under your belt, I hope the outpatient program will be a positive experience for you. It sounds great.
Always remember; you are worth the effort.

11-07-2011, 02:26 PM	#1 (permalink)
sexehshay Member Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: New York Posts: 7	Hey! I'm new here.. Hey, I'm sitting here reading everyone's experience, strength, and hope tonight. I love that I found this forum or else I am not sure what would be wandering through my idle mind. I am 52 days clean today but I find myself to be very lonely. I had to change people, places, and things, how did everybody else deal with this change? I constantly am at the fellowships, speaking with my sponsor, going out with some of the girls that I met in the rooms, and my family. I just feel lonely and bored during the day.

11-07-2011, 02:55 PM	#2 (permalink)
*nandm* Life the gift of recovery! Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Home is where the heart is Posts: 6,777	Welcome. Congrats on your sober time. Yes, early sobriety can be difficult fighting that boredom. I had trouble figuring out what to do with my time not drinking because everything I did before was with a drink in my hand. Life seemed really strange without it. It took a while for me learn how to do life without alcohol. When I got sober I had just moved over 2400 miles to be with someone I met and that relationship fell apart within 3 months leaving me in a city where I knew basically no one and had just started a new job all while trying to raise 3 children. So I do know what it is like in early sobriety to feel lonely and bored and at times scared. What worked for me was going to a lot of AA meetings and reaching out to a lot of people. This is a good place to meet people, I am glad you reached out here. I took a lot of drives through the countryside. I am fortunate enough to live in a beautiful state no matter what season. I did a lot of hiking, I even took my friends dogs hiking with me while she was at work just so I did not have to go alone. I worked a lot. I read a lot. I did my Step work. All of that work paid off though as eventually those feelings of loneliness and boredom did pass. Hang in there as you are not alone. Your life can get better and you can do it sober. Glad you are here reaching out and I hope you find the support and encouragement I have in these forums. Take care. __________________ NOTE: All BB quotes are from the 1st Edition of the Big Book Depression is not a sign of weakness. It is a sign of being too strong for too long.

11-07-2011, 04:09 PM	#3 (permalink)
catallus Contented Blast Billards Champion! Pool Jam Champion! Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: Massachusetts Posts: 124	Hey now, Many congrats on 52 days... It sounds like your meeting new friends in the program and building a network, good stuff, but what I also had to do was get to know myself. Over the years I buried myself in drugs and booze and never knew who I was or even what I liked to do. So I do suggest reintroducing yourself to you. Once you know who you are and what you like, you'll be able to fill in those idle alone times. For me, I had to develop a balanced program - program, work, play/social time, and alone time. It's all a balance. Let us know how you're doin', keep pluggin' away - it is worth it. __________________ With the GIFT of recovery...The sky's the limit...

11-08-2011, 12:53 PM	#5 (permalink)
sexehshay Member Join Date: Oct 2011 Location: New York Posts: 7	Thanks Catallus, I spend a lot of alone time trying to get to know me. I am trying to find new hobbies and I find myself reading more and more. I used to think that I hated to read (Go figure? LOL) In time I'm sure I'll figure out more and on the 23rd I start an intensive outpatient so I wont have so much idle time then and I'll even be able to get a job then. I am very excited!

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