Really Sick now..
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: North Richland Hills, Texas
Posts: 36
Really Sick now..
So my AD did go to rehab finally we got her to one in Florida and she was there and doing well enjoying the place she says that it is the most tight knit recovery atmosphere she'd ever been in she said that at the meetings there were people who had been sober for years and she was really excited. She started to get sick bronchitis then her heart rate was really up so they put her in the hospital she was in the hospital in the cardiac unit 4 around 3 days then discharged then back in. So I did what I thought I should do if I got her a ticket and I flew her home so that she can follow up with her own Dr. She got home and was still really sick her heart rate really up and not breathing well at all. Back to the ER this time they find that she's got blood clots in her lungs or pulmonary embolisms a pneumonia and sepsis and an infection in her heart. Now she's back in the hospital and she sad because she can't go to meetings and they're talking about putting her in a rehabilitation hospital for 4 weeks with a PICC line with antibiotics constant. She doesn't want to do this she feels that it's going to hurt her sobriety. She even left the first hospital Ama because she didn't think that they were respectful of her and her history. We all know how she got where she is a bad stick and the abscess another bad stick and another abscess. Just don't think she'll ever get a break it's like she gets sober and then she has to go back 10 feet to fix herself and all the trauma she's caused yourself. This isn't the first time though that she's had pulmonary embolism it was 2 years to the day ago that she had them before I'm assuming from the same reason. She had just started finding meth and then had a major depression. A few months after that bout she was in a car wreck not her fault and some guy hit her almost head-on and she broke her femur in 3 places I don't know how much more of this child can go through s*** she's not a child she's 25 now. I feel so helpless I don't think it's ever going to stop because of course they are now giving her pain meds because pulmonary embolisms are very very painful and I'm afraid that she's going to spiral out of where she's at and go back to being an active user. Shaking my head of course I'm in Pittsburgh for business and my husband is having to handle all of this I just want it to stop the Merry-Go-Round the carousel whatever you want to call it I just want the cycle to stop.
Forum Leader
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: The Burgh
Posts: 1,991
Hi Jenniray,
I'm sorry this is happening with your daughter. I'm not a professional, but it sounds like at the moment your daughter needs acute medical care. The rehab hospital would be in a controlled environment, correct?
I'm sorry this is happening with your daughter. I'm not a professional, but it sounds like at the moment your daughter needs acute medical care. The rehab hospital would be in a controlled environment, correct?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: NORTHFIELD
Posts: 188
Big hugs to you. I am sorry that it's so complicated right now. Something you said struck me though....
*** it's like she gets sober and then she has to go back 10 feet to fix herself and all the trauma she's caused yourself.***
Maybe this is PART of her healing, dealing with the affects. Maybe it will bring her further along than if she was sober and didn't have to deal with these issues. Maybe, it will somehow cement it in her mind, if/when she connects it.
It's so hard as a mom to have to watch it play out. I understand the helpless feeling. I was a single mom for a long time, and someone I knew once told me that my son has his own path to walk. He has to walk it himself. Just as I have my own. It resonated with me. Just know, you aren't alone in this. I'll ride it out with you.
*** it's like she gets sober and then she has to go back 10 feet to fix herself and all the trauma she's caused yourself.***
Maybe this is PART of her healing, dealing with the affects. Maybe it will bring her further along than if she was sober and didn't have to deal with these issues. Maybe, it will somehow cement it in her mind, if/when she connects it.
It's so hard as a mom to have to watch it play out. I understand the helpless feeling. I was a single mom for a long time, and someone I knew once told me that my son has his own path to walk. He has to walk it himself. Just as I have my own. It resonated with me. Just know, you aren't alone in this. I'll ride it out with you.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: New York
Posts: 775
Hi Jenniry In the program they call this cleaning up the wreckage of your past. It scares me that they have her on pain meds. I dont know your/her history but I do know addiction. My hope for you/her is that once she gets all of this cleaned up she gets right back into her program. I dont mean meetings at home I mean back to Florida and finish her program. Then to sober living thats how it works. I'll be thinking of you and her and hoping this is a learning experience. Good luck
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: America
Posts: 4,136
Wow...that's a complicated situation. I'm going to send some healing energy for your daughter and prayers your way.
I know everyone worries about the addiction issue and the pain meds screwing things up. I know this is going to feel like a "crumpled up mess" for you all; especially for her. But, one of my concerns is also that folks WON'T medicate her for pain. This happened to one of my family members who was in a bad car wreck and ended up in a rehab facility and he was an addict. He was torn about taking the pain meds because of being an addict. But, by God, he was in so much pain he was having a hard time participating in physical therapy which he so badly needed.
What really pissed me o ff was some of the staff there restricted his pain meds and some of the Dr.'s were being stingy with his pain meds, and really that was COUNTERPRODUCTIVE. We complained and I felt like I was throwing a bit of a tizzy fit, but because of that....we finally came to an agreement that no matter what his history they needed to TREAT HIS PAIN. Now, mind you, they did not at any time push more pain meds on him than he needed to function without so much pain. He was able to recover from his physical wounds, and then they gradually cut down his pain meds. Physical rehab is NOT a good time for people to DETOX. It just isn't. That's what his Dr's finally came to see.
Yes, she will feel like she has lost a lot of ground, but there is not one darn thing she can do at this point to go back and change all the incidents that have happened in this last little while. She and everyone involved just have to take it where it is from this day forward.
A person can only do so much at once!
I know everyone worries about the addiction issue and the pain meds screwing things up. I know this is going to feel like a "crumpled up mess" for you all; especially for her. But, one of my concerns is also that folks WON'T medicate her for pain. This happened to one of my family members who was in a bad car wreck and ended up in a rehab facility and he was an addict. He was torn about taking the pain meds because of being an addict. But, by God, he was in so much pain he was having a hard time participating in physical therapy which he so badly needed.
What really pissed me o ff was some of the staff there restricted his pain meds and some of the Dr.'s were being stingy with his pain meds, and really that was COUNTERPRODUCTIVE. We complained and I felt like I was throwing a bit of a tizzy fit, but because of that....we finally came to an agreement that no matter what his history they needed to TREAT HIS PAIN. Now, mind you, they did not at any time push more pain meds on him than he needed to function without so much pain. He was able to recover from his physical wounds, and then they gradually cut down his pain meds. Physical rehab is NOT a good time for people to DETOX. It just isn't. That's what his Dr's finally came to see.
Yes, she will feel like she has lost a lot of ground, but there is not one darn thing she can do at this point to go back and change all the incidents that have happened in this last little while. She and everyone involved just have to take it where it is from this day forward.
A person can only do so much at once!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: America
Posts: 4,136
One more thing and this is a positive way to look at things:
During the course of time for my uncle's physical rehab...in one way or another, he DID continue to grow and change as a human being. He CONTINUED to face his demons, etc. He continued to work on his issues. We discovered the physical rehab. even brought some of his issues to the foreground...and really the staff there ended up being good at helping him process it all. There was a TON of support and encouragement to help him get back on his feet again. Once he DID that he left there feeling more empowered actually. As visitors/family we came as guests, but left as friends.
During the course of time for my uncle's physical rehab...in one way or another, he DID continue to grow and change as a human being. He CONTINUED to face his demons, etc. He continued to work on his issues. We discovered the physical rehab. even brought some of his issues to the foreground...and really the staff there ended up being good at helping him process it all. There was a TON of support and encouragement to help him get back on his feet again. Once he DID that he left there feeling more empowered actually. As visitors/family we came as guests, but left as friends.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,698
Dear Jenniray, it sounds like she really should comply with the doctors and face the medical concerns. Maybe she can see if the rehabilitation facility also offers meetings? Hugs, it is very hard. The physical ailments should and need to be considered priority for now.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: America
Posts: 4,136
Another thing that bothered my about my uncle's experience is that some of his closest family members, including his wife were trying to coerce him to do without enough pain meds. I really wish they wouldn't do that, dang it. They said things to him that made him feel guilty for needing and taking the pain meds. Well, excuse me-that is not their judgement call to make. If a person is in too much pain they don't want to move and they NEED to move because laying around too much brings its own set of complications.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: NC
Posts: 662
As an addict I needed something super EXTREME to happen before I realized that I didn't want to be a drug addict forever. It helped me to realize that I wanted something more out of life, that I truly was afraid of dying, and that I NEVER wanted to feel that way EVER again.
I know that as a parent this has to be heart breaking, but this isn't something that just happened to her. Every addict knows the risks of using but when in active addiction the addict just doesn't care- prime example being she went through this once and here she is in the same exact position. I will be praying for your family and that this is her rock bottom and that she will pull herself out of all this stronger and more determined then ever about recovery and life in general.
Please don't take this as I am being heartless or mean- I am just a recovered addict that has been where your daughter is and know how these moments can be the make it or break it moments in our lives. I pray she embraces it and throws herself into recovery.
HUGS. Please don't forget that YOUR needs matter. If we don't take care of ourselves then we are not in a position to help others in an effective or meaningful way. Be kind and gentle to yourself, I know life can seem cruel and heartless, but these are the moments that define us emotionally and spiritually.
I know that as a parent this has to be heart breaking, but this isn't something that just happened to her. Every addict knows the risks of using but when in active addiction the addict just doesn't care- prime example being she went through this once and here she is in the same exact position. I will be praying for your family and that this is her rock bottom and that she will pull herself out of all this stronger and more determined then ever about recovery and life in general.
Please don't take this as I am being heartless or mean- I am just a recovered addict that has been where your daughter is and know how these moments can be the make it or break it moments in our lives. I pray she embraces it and throws herself into recovery.
HUGS. Please don't forget that YOUR needs matter. If we don't take care of ourselves then we are not in a position to help others in an effective or meaningful way. Be kind and gentle to yourself, I know life can seem cruel and heartless, but these are the moments that define us emotionally and spiritually.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
