Co-dependent relationship after addiction
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: Richmond, Virginia
Posts: 18
I don't know what to do. I felt really gross and disconnected when he came home earlier trying to make amends. The issue is, I never told him to leave, he said he was leaving me... Then found a way to upset me and then leave again. So maybe it's a self fulfilling prophecy. The only thing I can do for now is to block him from contacting me via phone or text (this is where it really gets nasty) and keeping him away. He brings out the worst in me with his irrational behavior and accusations. Feels like I'm battling a demon, not my husband. A totally different feeling...
Bringing home a brand new truck with a $360.00 monthly payment without any input from you would NEVER fly in my household! What the heck?! Unh, uhh. He should never have done anything like THAT, in my book.If he wants or thinks he needs a new truck, he can pay for it himself or not get the new truck. All major purchases should be agreed on first by both you, and no mother in law's help! You gotta draw the line sister and stick to your boundaries and it don't matter what he calls you! You are NOT being controlling, you are trying to be NORMAL! I'm going to be blunt here, I wouldn't put up with any of his behaviors AT ALL. And as far as I'm concerned the MIL can just PACK SAND.
Darlin', you've got the power to stand up for yourself and call BS on the BS that's going on with the hub and MIL. Use that POWER.
Darlin', you've got the power to stand up for yourself and call BS on the BS that's going on with the hub and MIL. Use that POWER.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: Richmond, Virginia
Posts: 18
This act of of disregard and disrespect, is the same way they both treated me when he was using 2 years ago. So, although he may not be using (who ever really knows), the behavior still continues. 2 years ago.. She "helped" (with no job) move out of our marital home, put him up in a house and furnish it completely. She was so happy help him leave his wife and children that she wasn't willing to accept that he was using. It was a very painful time and made me furious to watch. This behavior remains...:/
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Join Date: Apr 2016
Posts: 293
Sounds like my MIL. He has his steady enabler who he can lean on anytime. My MIL enables my AH 24/7 and ignores everything I've told her about his drug addiction. I've given her numerous examples of times where I have found drugs in our home and she still tells other family members "he seems fine". Your MIL and AH are not respecting your boundaries or you for that matter. Have you ever considered taking yourself out of the picture? it doesn't sound like they even acknowledge that you are in the picture. I'm sorry you are going through this.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: Richmond, Virginia
Posts: 18
You're right. Most times they don't acknowledge that I'm even in the picture. So I've decided that I'm moving. I'm filling out a mortgage app today and trying to move at least 30 min away from here. Our house is literally within walking distance from the enabler MIL. When it comes to the enabler Parent I don't think that they want to acknowledge that their kids are on drugs. Their enabling is like a drug, once you admit it, you have to do something about it. My AH hocked her only TV we had bought her for Christmas and she still wouldn't face the facts. His sickness ensures that she will always be needed.
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