KeepinItReal

My husband has embraced the steps. We have been through the wash so many times. Up and down on the roller coaster. Sober, high, sober, high, sober, high. I have battled with myself to kick him out - let him stay - detach myself emotionally - develop dreams for my life without him in them - make my days happy despite what he is doing. I stay on my side of the street. I learned to not engage in the drama. To not put up with the manipulation and the BS. I have "our" money in my control. I have not let go of control of our finances. Probably will not trust him with handling "our" money - ever.
We are working our relationship together. I am working my recovery and he works his own. He goes out almost every night to meetings. Sober looks like sober - and he's sober. I go walking every night. I am continuing to lose weight (after a gain when I found out I had cancer) I am focusing on saving money and buying a home. I have goals. Real goals that can be accomplished with or without him.
I have a hard time saying i'm grateful for what addiction has taught me. However, it has grown me. Spiritually and emotionally I have grown and have a deeper understanding how precious life is. I live each day.
I hope all of you who struggle find peace. I hope that the peace sticks and relapse never occurs. I hope that we can all learn something from our tragic experiences.

Ann

You are so right, when they are clean and sober there is no wondering, no doubting, it shows in their actions.

As another cancer survivor, let me commend you on taking care of yourself. I too gained weight and am walking it off.

Hugs

JOIE12

this journey of ours can carry a lot of heartbreak, but healing comes with knowing that everything doesn't have to continue to hurt. We can share our lessons and accept the simple truths about life. Making something good come from such pain. Otherwise, it was all for nothing.

Thank you for sharing your hope
Hugs
Joie