My son, addict, age 42.
Jujubee Queen
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Port Charlotte, Florida
Posts: 3,582
My son, addict, age 42.
Good Morning everyone,
Just thought I'd take the time and post an update.
Many of you know me as a mom of 2 sons, ages 37, and 42.
Some of you know me as a long time "enabler" that finally "got It".
(THAT took a good while...lol)
Onward....
My husband "Frank" (we'll call him) and I moved from Ohio to Port Charlotte, Florida, August of 2013. Enjoying the sun, and fun....
Our youngest, moved down here also, 5 miles away with his GF.
He is somewhat sober, uses marijuana occasionally, and drinks alcohol. But not using Meth anymore...yeah!
Oldest son, cam down for a visit a year ado January, and brought the drama with him. Oh yeah, and 5 other people I knew nothing about. The others mostly stayed in a hotel, and son and GF stayed here a couple nights, but mostly stayed at younger sons. Yelling, screaming...arguing between him and GF, it was ugly. He won't be invited back. Not that he was REALLY invited anyway.
It assured me that oldest son still is deeply hooked on drugs, will most likely never be completely sober, and his bottom is not going to be a happy one. Well, it will be for him, cause he won't be dealing with addiction anymore, if you know what I mean.
I feel somewhat guilty, and feel we have abandoned him, by moving lock stock and barrel and very rarely hear from him. I very rarely contact him, b/c it's always the same story, him projecting blame onto others...blah blah blah.
He'll be going back to prison soon, as he has 3 court cases up and coming.
Since we will be traveling North this Summer for a few weeks, I'm hoping that is true, because avoidance would make me feel easier than to see him.
Youngest son hurt his back, after being on a job for 3 days, and has now been on workmans compensation for 1 1/2 yrs. Heaven knows where our sons will be when we pass away, no one seems to be working hard....
And on to me, I am struggling....Loving the winter weather, disliking the hot Summer, and missing the North but really what's there to complain about? I'm healthy, somewhat sane, and alive.
just an update...
Love you, miss you all.............
Just thought I'd take the time and post an update.
Many of you know me as a mom of 2 sons, ages 37, and 42.
Some of you know me as a long time "enabler" that finally "got It".
(THAT took a good while...lol)
Onward....
My husband "Frank" (we'll call him) and I moved from Ohio to Port Charlotte, Florida, August of 2013. Enjoying the sun, and fun....
Our youngest, moved down here also, 5 miles away with his GF.
He is somewhat sober, uses marijuana occasionally, and drinks alcohol. But not using Meth anymore...yeah!
Oldest son, cam down for a visit a year ado January, and brought the drama with him. Oh yeah, and 5 other people I knew nothing about. The others mostly stayed in a hotel, and son and GF stayed here a couple nights, but mostly stayed at younger sons. Yelling, screaming...arguing between him and GF, it was ugly. He won't be invited back. Not that he was REALLY invited anyway.
It assured me that oldest son still is deeply hooked on drugs, will most likely never be completely sober, and his bottom is not going to be a happy one. Well, it will be for him, cause he won't be dealing with addiction anymore, if you know what I mean.
I feel somewhat guilty, and feel we have abandoned him, by moving lock stock and barrel and very rarely hear from him. I very rarely contact him, b/c it's always the same story, him projecting blame onto others...blah blah blah.
He'll be going back to prison soon, as he has 3 court cases up and coming.
Since we will be traveling North this Summer for a few weeks, I'm hoping that is true, because avoidance would make me feel easier than to see him.
Youngest son hurt his back, after being on a job for 3 days, and has now been on workmans compensation for 1 1/2 yrs. Heaven knows where our sons will be when we pass away, no one seems to be working hard....
And on to me, I am struggling....Loving the winter weather, disliking the hot Summer, and missing the North but really what's there to complain about? I'm healthy, somewhat sane, and alive.
just an update...
Love you, miss you all.............
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: USA
Posts: 13,560
Huge hugs to you.
I can hear through your post that you are strong in your own resolve of detatchment with love. That is amazing and wonderful. There comes a time that you turn them over to God, and hope and pray for the best.
I hope you enjoy your upcoming travels, and thank you for the update!
I can hear through your post that you are strong in your own resolve of detatchment with love. That is amazing and wonderful. There comes a time that you turn them over to God, and hope and pray for the best.
I hope you enjoy your upcoming travels, and thank you for the update!
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Awwww, Moose, some things never change. Your oldest son and my son both seem to be stuck on the path of self-destruction and there's not a darn thing we can do about it...and lord knows, we tried. I won't speak for you but I know that I was a frequent flyer on the Crazyplane of insanity, chasing my son in a town an hour away and threatening to kick down the door of a crack house if he didn't come out. Well, that worked well...he did come out and when I left he went back. Who would ever have guessed? I finally let the circus leave town without me.
We are different people today, you and I. Thanks to Al-anon and CoDA for me, and for the support of wonderful friends like you, I found my sanity and serenity again and I won't be letting it go anytime soon.
You found yours too, you have a lovely place in the south (although I do miss visiting you at your island cottage here), and you know how to say "no" and mean it.
Your boys both are in my prayers each day, I'm sorry the oldest is heading back to prison and glad the younger is doing better than before and hope he will be able to return to work soon.
Please give Frank a big hug from me and take one yourself, there are lots to go around.
Sharing this journey with friends like you is a big part of my recovery and one of the fun parts of my life.
Love you lots!
Hugs
Ann
We are different people today, you and I. Thanks to Al-anon and CoDA for me, and for the support of wonderful friends like you, I found my sanity and serenity again and I won't be letting it go anytime soon.
You found yours too, you have a lovely place in the south (although I do miss visiting you at your island cottage here), and you know how to say "no" and mean it.
Your boys both are in my prayers each day, I'm sorry the oldest is heading back to prison and glad the younger is doing better than before and hope he will be able to return to work soon.
Please give Frank a big hug from me and take one yourself, there are lots to go around.
Sharing this journey with friends like you is a big part of my recovery and one of the fun parts of my life.
Love you lots!
Hugs
Ann
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 16,246
;mooselips......if your son goes back to prison....in some ways, he will be safer, in my opinion.
Hopefully, he will be sentenced to a drug program.....I know that it happens in some cases.
There is still hope......put him in God's hands and love him from a distance.
That is what we mothers have to do.....
dandylion
Hopefully, he will be sentenced to a drug program.....I know that it happens in some cases.
There is still hope......put him in God's hands and love him from a distance.
That is what we mothers have to do.....
dandylion
Administrator
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: a better place
Posts: 4,047
I'm sorry you sound a bit blue, Moose. Glad you know that there are folks who get it here and you checked in. I hope you have a wonderful trip North this summer, minus any drama from your son.
I know you know it, but you have nothing to feel guilty about and no reason that you have to invite the drama back in by seeing him when your travel. I'm a big believer in doing what feels right for you, and from reading your post, it sure sounds like loving from a distance is a healthy choice for you.
Glad your younger son is living a less dramatic life!
Hugs, I hope tomorrow is a brighter day.
I know you know it, but you have nothing to feel guilty about and no reason that you have to invite the drama back in by seeing him when your travel. I'm a big believer in doing what feels right for you, and from reading your post, it sure sounds like loving from a distance is a healthy choice for you.
Glad your younger son is living a less dramatic life!
Hugs, I hope tomorrow is a brighter day.
Forum Leader
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: The Burgh
Posts: 1,991
Hi there Moosie!
I'm sorry you are feeling a bit down.
I think it just sneaks up on us every once in a while. I know if happens to me even though none of what I know is new news.
It's usually when I am tired, so I suppose NOT thinking about things takes a conscious effort.
I'm sorry you are feeling a bit down.
I think it just sneaks up on us every once in a while. I know if happens to me even though none of what I know is new news.
It's usually when I am tired, so I suppose NOT thinking about things takes a conscious effort.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
