waitingforhope

I'm officially on my way to divorce! Not sure how I feel. Anxious but surprised I'm actually excited about it too. I can't say I'm happy but I'm not feeling sad as I expected to. Maybe I did more homework on myself than I thought in this short amount of time. I don't know for sure. I'm hoping I don't have a crash about this at some time.

zoso77

Well...what I would say is be aware that your emotions are going to be all over the map in the hours and days to come. And that's natural, I think. The challenge will be sitting with everything you're feeling...

hopeful4

So, he has not run off to Timbucktoo after all eh? Glad he is served and you are able to move forward.

XXX

biminiblue

Yay.

Reason to be thankful.

waitingforhope

Yes apparently he at least at some point on Thursday he was at his mom's yet. I don't know what time they caught him. That's where they served him though. Don't know if his message he had left them on Wednesday night that he was moving this past Friday is true or not either. I'm kind of hoping he continues to be irresponsible now and doesn't show up at the temporary hearing or the actual divorce so everything will be ruled in my favor by default.

Ann

One day at a time, your life is getting better. I agree with Zoso that I think you will have emotional ups and downs over this, and that's all okay, just don't linger in the "downs" too long.

Stay safe, allow yourself to feel, don't get drawn into any drama he may try to attach to all this, and remember to breathe any time you find yourself tense. Breathe and pause to think things through before you respond to even yourself.

By the time a divorce is in process, the marriage is already over and it's like closing the door on an already empty room. Find your closure and peace with all this, then one day when it is over you will feel ready for wonderful new beginnings that will wait for you to arrive.

Hugs

waitingforhope

I have been wound pretty tight lately. Maybe I'm doing too much to try to distract myself like it's over kill instead of just feeling whatever it is I need to? I cried the other morning for about 10 minutes for no good reason it seemed. And then I went about my day as if my little morning episode was an after thought. I read my other post about the holidays and said to myself all the extra hours at work and the family we adopted for Christmas, am I nuts for trying to do all this or is it a good thing like I intended to help my kids, another family and I? Am I doing really what's best for my kids or am I avoiding dealing with stuff? I don't think my kids have the expectations of me that I have of me.

jjj111

w4h, I totally feel you on this. I am a planner, as you mentioned you are, and I will sometimes keep myself busy and go overboard on planning when I am really stressed out. I think you're very wise to ask yourself if you're taking on a lot (maybe too much?) right now to burn off energy. To some extent, it's probably healthy to keep busy. But do remember to give yourself time to breathe and relax and be present with your kids. Give yourself a pat on the back for doing what needs to be done to take care of you and your children, take a deep breath, and try to find a way to relax! Hot baths or showers work wonders for me.

waitingforhope

That is wise advise! I make my girls take time every night before bed to just chill and wind down and then I don't follow my own lead......smh