Consider Letting it Go
Nature Girl
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Consider Letting it Go Thursday, July 31, 2014
Consider letting it go
If you’re filled with resentment or frustration, you’re wasting your precious time and energy. The more quickly you can let the bad stuff go, the more quickly you can move on to the good stuff.
People and events will regularly cause delays, inconveniences, expenses, disappointments and worse in your life. Don’t add to the damages by letting those things keep you down.
When people have wronged you or events have sidetracked you, you have plenty of great reasons for complaints and excuses. But complaints and excuses don’t provide anything of value to your life.
Although whatever has happened to you may be highly unfair, wrong and inconsiderate, consider letting it go. For your own sake, consider letting it go.
Instead of giving others the power to get you down, give yourself the power to move forward. Instead of being content to collect those complaints and excuses, enjoy the freedom and satisfaction of making life positive and fulfilling no matter what.
Make the choice to live with joy, intention and purpose rather than with anger and resentment. Free yourself from the world’s negativity by choosing to look ahead, to live ahead, and to get ahead.
— Ralph Marston
Consider letting it go
If you’re filled with resentment or frustration, you’re wasting your precious time and energy. The more quickly you can let the bad stuff go, the more quickly you can move on to the good stuff.
People and events will regularly cause delays, inconveniences, expenses, disappointments and worse in your life. Don’t add to the damages by letting those things keep you down.
When people have wronged you or events have sidetracked you, you have plenty of great reasons for complaints and excuses. But complaints and excuses don’t provide anything of value to your life.
Although whatever has happened to you may be highly unfair, wrong and inconsiderate, consider letting it go. For your own sake, consider letting it go.
Instead of giving others the power to get you down, give yourself the power to move forward. Instead of being content to collect those complaints and excuses, enjoy the freedom and satisfaction of making life positive and fulfilling no matter what.
Make the choice to live with joy, intention and purpose rather than with anger and resentment. Free yourself from the world’s negativity by choosing to look ahead, to live ahead, and to get ahead.
— Ralph Marston
Nature Girl
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
After years of recovery and working hard to maintain a healthy outlook, I still have difficulty letting go of resentments sometimes.
I no longer sweat the small stuff but this past year a family member, one I rarely see or have any need to interact with, has annoyed me until my teeth hurt. This person has taken some money that he was not entitled to from an estate. Not a life changing amount for anyone, and it's not even an amount that I care much about, my life is fine without it (thank you God). This is a matter where drugs and addiction don't exist, he's just a stinker, sober or not.
But the fact that he did this without remorse or consequence annoys me and I carry that annoyance around with me. Others, my husband and other family members made a decision to let it go, a long time ago. They were right. It was a situation where you either waste more energy and money fighting it than you would gain if you were successful.
They are right of course, letting it go is the answer. Holding a resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die...I have quoted that here for years.
And yet...I struggle.
Reading this today made me decide that I am giving myself 24 hours to think it out, write it out, talk it out with the universe and God, and then once and for all let the darn thing go. *Poof* gone. If the thought reappears I will slap it out of my head and not allow myself to entertain resentment for one more day. It's time for that nasty visitor to my head to go home.
I feel better just sharing this here today.
Hugs
I no longer sweat the small stuff but this past year a family member, one I rarely see or have any need to interact with, has annoyed me until my teeth hurt. This person has taken some money that he was not entitled to from an estate. Not a life changing amount for anyone, and it's not even an amount that I care much about, my life is fine without it (thank you God). This is a matter where drugs and addiction don't exist, he's just a stinker, sober or not.
But the fact that he did this without remorse or consequence annoys me and I carry that annoyance around with me. Others, my husband and other family members made a decision to let it go, a long time ago. They were right. It was a situation where you either waste more energy and money fighting it than you would gain if you were successful.
They are right of course, letting it go is the answer. Holding a resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die...I have quoted that here for years.
And yet...I struggle.
Reading this today made me decide that I am giving myself 24 hours to think it out, write it out, talk it out with the universe and God, and then once and for all let the darn thing go. *Poof* gone. If the thought reappears I will slap it out of my head and not allow myself to entertain resentment for one more day. It's time for that nasty visitor to my head to go home.
I feel better just sharing this here today.
Hugs
Nature Girl
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Instead of giving others the power to get you down, give yourself the power to move forward.
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Join Date: May 2014
Location: liverpool, england
Posts: 1,708
the art of letting go is really an art in itself
first of all i have to see i am hurting and see that someone or something has just hurt me then think before i act or react
think once just to take a breath before opening my gob if i am still feeling that urge to open my gob or slam somthing then think again about what else i could do ie a walk or remove myself from the situation
or think again and by this time i have normaly got on top of it by seeing i am just wanting to react again and simply let it go and do somthing else
sounds easy but its so hard to do when your in the thick of it or something catches you when you dont expect it
it makes me also understand that anything can change and normaly does as any point in time. its how i deal with it or react to it that counts
the peace i find for letting go is the reward for my efforts.
the world will not be a better place with me shouting at it
first of all i have to see i am hurting and see that someone or something has just hurt me then think before i act or react
think once just to take a breath before opening my gob if i am still feeling that urge to open my gob or slam somthing then think again about what else i could do ie a walk or remove myself from the situation
or think again and by this time i have normaly got on top of it by seeing i am just wanting to react again and simply let it go and do somthing else
sounds easy but its so hard to do when your in the thick of it or something catches you when you dont expect it
it makes me also understand that anything can change and normaly does as any point in time. its how i deal with it or react to it that counts
the peace i find for letting go is the reward for my efforts.
the world will not be a better place with me shouting at it
Nature Girl
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Join Date: Mar 2002
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Originally Posted by desypete 
the peace i find for letting go is the reward for my efforts.
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Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: long island ny
Posts: 64
ann, i am so sorry you are feeling down, it hurts when people we love do the wrong things and continually disappoint. You have a great spirit which through your posts has given me the strength to move on days i didn't think i could function. you have an inner strength and wisdom that all of us here are so greatful that you impart. i wish you some peace with your situation.
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Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 117
Thank you, Ann! I am really struggling with this right now. I know I need to let it go but I keep getting stuck. Sometimes it's just me running around like a crazy person trying to "set the record straight" so that he doesn't "get away with it". Dumb!
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Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 845
Thanks so much for sharing this, Ann! I am really struggling right now to let go of disappointment and frustration and get back to living my life. I found out a little over a month ago that I was pregnant and then found out a couple weeks ago that I would miscarry. The worst of the physical part of the miscarriage is over, but the grief is lingering on and I've been struggling to let go and open myself up to joy again. I have been feeling angry at the world, and angry at my addict sister, too, for not being more supportive after I shared this news. I gave myself some time to rest and recuperate, but duty calls. I have work that I urgently need to do, and ultimately watching TV and wallowing is not getting me anywhere. So it was a comfort to read this today and to be reminded that I could choose to set aside my grief for a little while and run some errands and do some work that I care about. It's so important to remember that it's our choice how we deal with life's disappointments.
Nature Girl
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Join Date: Mar 2002
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(((jjj))) 
I am so sorry for your loss, and it is a great loss to lose a baby to miscarriage. I am sorry you didn't have lots of support to help you through the tough times. It's okay to grieve, it's healthy to release the pain, but you are wise not to linger in that sad place too long.
MamaCas, I have been as crazy as you, and I think when we do that what we are really looking for is validation...validation for our anger and disappointment and hurt.
Oceanlady, thank you for your sweet thoughts. I'm not going through a sad or difficult time, it's more that I have been carrying this useless baggage of resentment around with me far too long. Like a bag of rocks it just wears me down and serves no useful purpose.
I bought some lovely big white hydrangea for my garden today, lovely big white flowers that will continue blooming until September. That's the reward I have promised myself for doing the work I need to do to rid myself of resentment once and for all. I CAN be bribed, lol, and I just bribed myself today.
Like worry, resentments serve no purpose and just rob us of all serenity. No more...not for me.
Hugs
I am so sorry for your loss, and it is a great loss to lose a baby to miscarriage. I am sorry you didn't have lots of support to help you through the tough times. It's okay to grieve, it's healthy to release the pain, but you are wise not to linger in that sad place too long.MamaCas, I have been as crazy as you, and I think when we do that what we are really looking for is validation...validation for our anger and disappointment and hurt.
Oceanlady, thank you for your sweet thoughts. I'm not going through a sad or difficult time, it's more that I have been carrying this useless baggage of resentment around with me far too long. Like a bag of rocks it just wears me down and serves no useful purpose.
I bought some lovely big white hydrangea for my garden today, lovely big white flowers that will continue blooming until September. That's the reward I have promised myself for doing the work I need to do to rid myself of resentment once and for all. I CAN be bribed, lol, and I just bribed myself today.
Like worry, resentments serve no purpose and just rob us of all serenity. No more...not for me.
Hugs
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Another Earth
Posts: 172
Originally Posted by Ann
Reading this today made me decide that I am giving myself 24 hours to think it out, write it out, talk it out with the universe and God, and then once and for all let the darn thing go. *Poof* gone. If the thought reappears I will slap it out of my head and not allow myself to entertain resentment for one more day. It's time for that nasty visitor to my head to go home.
Nature Girl
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
As a follow up, I did write about it as honestly and thoroughly as I could. I prayed on it and gave it up as best I could,
It hasn't disappeared completely, as I hoped it would. Not sure if that means I still haven't completely given it up or if it is just residue that I need to clean up too.
I do feel better and I plan to tell myself "not an option" any time my thinking goes to resentment on this.
For today, I feel refreshed and know that I haven't stuffed anything about this. That's the worst for me, when I stuff feelings.
Maybe it's just the lesson that remains, I hope so. Thanks for supporting me on this and sharing how it works for you.
It hasn't disappeared completely, as I hoped it would. Not sure if that means I still haven't completely given it up or if it is just residue that I need to clean up too.
I do feel better and I plan to tell myself "not an option" any time my thinking goes to resentment on this.
For today, I feel refreshed and know that I haven't stuffed anything about this. That's the worst for me, when I stuff feelings.
Maybe it's just the lesson that remains, I hope so. Thanks for supporting me on this and sharing how it works for you.
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