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Old 01-21-2010, 11:28 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Do ex Meth Users still.......

do ex meth users still pick at their skin and scratch?
Do they break out still?

I Know a guy who is says he is not using and has pee test every 3 days or so. (so he tells me)

We had a conflict and I told him I couldn't be around him any longer. Then ended up calling him when my grandpa died. He said he had a nervous breakdown
and broke out. When I saw him, he was shaky and his face was all broken out
he had scabs on his face, arms and stomach. He said when he gets nervous he picks and he was scratching his skin.
His breath smelled kind of like he was sick (you know that sick breathe some one has when they have been sick with the flu)

I point blank ask if he was using, he no. Then added how could I, I get pee tests not enough time inbetween for it go leave my system.

So can an ex meth user still have that bad habit of picking and scratching when they get stressed out or that is some thing they do only when using?

dawn
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Old 01-22-2010, 12:07 AM   #2 (permalink)
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hi wonder, sorry i don't have any esp with meth users. others will be along shortly who has and can probably answer your questions. glad to hear you broke it off with him though. i think whether or not he's using is his issue, if he's sick then maybe he should see a dr. but again, thats his issue.

my question to you is, with all of his issues, aren't you kind of glad you had the strength to back away? just curious, is he working any type of plan of recovery? i'm sure you already know that an addict will do/say whatever is needed to keep their addiction hidden as long as possibly.

try to keep the focus on you and keep moving forward unless you are willing to except him and his issues as is, whatever they might be. time will answer your questions about whether or not he is still using. personally, i think you deserve so much more. addiction is a life long disease and recovery has to become a life style. until he is ready to get better for himself, his addiction will progressively get worse and if you decide to stick around, you are in for the ride of a life time. jmo
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Old 01-22-2010, 12:30 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by iWonder View Post
do ex meth users still pick at their skin and scratch?
Do they break out still?

I Know a guy who is says he is not using and has pee test every 3 days or so. (so he tells me)

We had a conflict and I told him I couldn't be around him any longer. Then ended up calling him when my grandpa died. He said he had a nervous breakdown
and broke out. When I saw him, he was shaky and his face was all broken out
he had scabs on his face, arms and stomach. He said when he gets nervous he picks and he was scratching his skin.
His breath smelled kind of like he was sick (you know that sick breathe some one has when they have been sick with the flu)

I point blank ask if he was using, he no. Then added how could I, I get pee tests not enough time inbetween for it go leave my system.

So can an ex meth user still have that bad habit of picking and scratching when they get stressed out or that is some thing they do only when using?

dawn

Yea they can, but after time it goes away.

If your this concerned seems like a red flag to me, I would take a step back and reevaluate the friendship, listen to your gut feeling and I bet you find the answers you are looking for here.

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Old 01-22-2010, 04:46 AM   #4 (permalink)
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it's hard to stay out of the obsession with the addict isn't it?

i thought the same thing, with mine, and then when i knew he to be clean & sober, the picking seemed to happen still. he said it is a nervous habit. (yeah sure it is i thought)
then i did some google-ing and discovered that for some people it is. i know a guy who has never used drugs and does this, esp. when times are stressful. now i know my addict is doing it a lot the last few days, because he is getting ready for a major change.

so even though your gut is prob the best indication, sometimes our heads are spinning and we don't know which end is up. evaluate on his behavior. why is he getting ua's every 3 days? is he in a program?
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Old 01-22-2010, 05:27 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Having a clean pee test every 3 days is not an indication he is clean. Not only am I a recovering codependent, but also a recovering addict/alcoholic. Meth was my drug of choice, along with alcohol. Meth flushes out of the system very quickly.

I'd suggest sitting down and asking yourself just what are you getting out of this friendship?
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Old 01-22-2010, 05:30 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Hi,

My ex ABF is a meth user. The ONLY time he had scabs or picked his skin was when he was using. He would look me in the eye and lie thru his teeth that he was not using.

He also used the " I have to take pee tests so how could I be using" Well I was with him a year and yes he had to take pee test once a month from his parole officer. Never did fell a test. He was using Meth that whole time. I was told that the drug takes only a couple days to leave your system if that. So, he would get clean just long enough to take the test. OR I believe I was told by one of his friends that he used " fake urine" or "clean urine" to take the test..not actually his own.

So, all I'm saying is with a METH user, you have NO idea if he is telling the truth. I just realized after being with him for a year that he basically was lieing to be the whole time. I would say if he has scabs on his body...he is still using. Look up the pictures on the internet of meth sores...that is what I did and they looked exactly like what he had on his body...

Take care of you...because a meth addict WON'T!
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Old 01-22-2010, 07:47 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Having a clean pee test every 3 days is not an indication he is clean. Not only am I a recovering codependent, but also a recovering addict/alcoholic. Meth was my drug of choice, along with alcohol. Meth flushes out of the system very quickly.

I'd suggest sitting down and asking yourself just what are you getting out of this friendship?
Some Meth does not stay in your system long at all. This is true.

My husband would still fuss with arm sores (one in particular) after he was clean. His skin DID significantly improve over time, though. It did take a few months. He still has that one sore that is chronically making his life a pain (and he got some topical antibiotic ointment which I think is helping).

Some forms of amphetamine only stays in your system 2-7 hours. Other forms stay 2-4 days. Most of the street crap that's out there is in and out relatively quickly, though.

Meth addicts can often have a burning plastic smell to them, or even cat urine (from the chemicals). I'd look at his behavior. Meth addicts usually have a difficult time sitting still when they're high, stay up for all hours of the night then crash for days at a time.

Sorry you're having to go through this. In the end, it's up to you if and how you will trust this friend. If you are having issues believing him, then there's nothing wrong with taking a step back and telling him, "look, I'm just not ready right now. I don't believe you. Please don't take that personally, but you hurt my trust in the past. I need some space."

You have to be willing to recapture your own sanity.
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Old 01-22-2010, 09:25 AM   #8 (permalink)
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This is a great question and relates to a question I have. My ex was living with some people who were ex meth users. And they had the weirdest movement disorders. Real jerky and shaky like - never still.

Is that an after effect of meth use? Will they be like that forever? It is so bizzare to be around them.
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Old 01-22-2010, 09:37 AM   #9 (permalink)
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I only know of my experience and the 2 Meth users I have been around.

Both were ONLY jerky (especially in their sleep) or could not be still for longer than 2 minutes when they were USING. One of them had used Meth off and on for 20 yrs the other for only about 5 yrs

When they were clean, there was no jerky motions, no odors from them and they were able to sit still and at least watch a TV show or have a conversation.

Just my experience.
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Old 01-22-2010, 11:52 AM   #10 (permalink)
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My husband did not display tweaker behavior after the fact, but he also didn't use huge amounts. Maybe if you use more it damages the brain? Perhaps connecting with nerves?

He does still twitch in his sleep, though. The doctors said that may take a few years to go away completely, if it does at all.
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Old 01-22-2010, 05:09 PM   #11 (permalink)
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yeah, the tweaky or jerky actions sound like using symptoms to me too.

one other thought on the picking is that although he may not have done it prior to the meth days, he may have developed it as a little ocd behavior, after it started while he was using. my guess is that it will go away with time, but if my man is any indication, it is hard to drop. he mostly does it in his sleep so he can't control it.
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Old 01-22-2010, 09:36 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Thank You for replying.
He ended up in Prison after the women he was dating (also a meth addict) turned him in
they had a child together. He did his time (turns out while he was in prison, karma is a bitch I guess, cuz she landed herself in prison which is where she is still) He did the program the court wanted him and also did half way house stays. He still has Parole office check on him and has to go get pee test every 3 days (he said) I met him not knowing of this about him, but picked up very quickly some thing was not quite right, felt he was shady couldnt figure it out thought perhaps he was cheating due to some strange behaviour until one night he blurted it all it that he been in prison. Anyway, that did not detour me as people make mistakes and he made a huge one that landed him in prison. He paid for it and now out, people can change and he deserves a chance. I dont want to be like everyone and turn my back on him. I tried doing the dating thing with him until three weeks ago he sent me a text and then didn't reply for several hours. I sent him a text finally saying that is it we are not dating. and then all of a sudden he text saying I left my phone at home was at toys r us with kids and got pizza sorry. (he text me that didn,t pick up phone to say that.) I told him I didnt believe him. all he said to that was gee ok. I pursued it more and he wouldnt pick up the phone, and then all he text was his hands were full. I got fed up and that gave me visions of him in a hotel some where using and having sex with some stranger. I told him I cant do this, his behaviour was not normal. I went a whole week not talking to him, until my grandpa died and then I reached out to him. He said he would come over as long as I didnt laugh cuz he's breaking out from stress and really shaking (that he had a nervous breakdown.
I picked him up and he was shaky and saw that not only did he have "break outs" on his face he had a sore on his stomach and a few on his arms and hand. He said it was from nerves. Me telling it was over made him lose it. I wondered if in fact he really was off using that day which is why he would not call me. A week later his face broke out he said due to stressed out and depressed or overwhelmed he still has that habit. So I wondered if picking and scratching IS ONLY when they are using Or that could be a left over thing that could happen. I told him I could only be his friend cuz it also turns out he had been online chatting with other people the whole time we were suppose to be committed. I am a christian and really want to be there for him. He needs a normal (non user) friend in his life, and not just ex users, since they can back slide. I see the frustration since you can't help some one who will lie about it. He wrote me a letter, which I am going to post for you guys to read. I did a lot of blaming and I feel did the pity party and poor me act. Which I called him out on. He has been out of prison for 4 months and says he can't get a job. His parents I feel are enablers to a point as they are not encouraging him to hit the pavement and keep trying until some one says yes. They say no one wants to hire an ex inmate. I think he fear stops him but once he got a job, it would give him a sense of self worth and accomplishment, keeps him off the internet and gets him back into society doing a normal thing (like a job) even if it is a fast food place or home depot or Something just to start! He goes to school right now two nights a week. He spends a lot of time on the net and especially Craigs List (which is a terrible place for him to be on I think) the personal ads have many people wanting to party and have sex. I try to encourage him and be that voice of reason. I just trying to get more educated so I can call him out on it if I think or know he is bull shitting. If it turns out you only pick and scratch while using then I know what to say to him and how to encourage him. "okay you screwed up" forgive yourself and get back on the wagon. Lets move forward and try again." But I don't know maybe getting a job is not the answer.
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Old 01-23-2010, 07:30 AM   #13 (permalink)
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My ex was in prison.. in my state they have resources to help the inmate with employment. Our local employment office posts jobs that are recovery act jobs.
It may be harder to get a job, but if he really wanted it, he would checking out every
option available.

My exAH doc was meth. He had the sores and picking after he'd been using. I seem to remember them clearing up when he had some clean time. He also had a terrible chemical like odor when he'd try to kiss me... or in his sweat like after working.

I felt the way you do when I first found out about my AH's addiction. I thought I could talk him in to getting better, love him a little more, do things to make it a little easier on him... if he didn't have stress, he wouldn't use. I finally learned that nothing *I* did could get him better. He had to make that decision to quit on his own because he was sick and tired of using.

SR is a wonderful place of learning and support. Be sure to read all the sticky posts at the top of the forum, learn all you can about addiction so you know exactly what you are up against. It is a roller coaster of a life living with a front row seat to active addiction. But we can learn how to not let it affect us. We can take care of ourselves.
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Old 01-23-2010, 10:32 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Hmm? My son is/was? a meth user. He's been out of prison now for 15 months. When he was in prison he looked great!! I never saw him picking at his skin, but he did mention something about a rash?

No, I think when they are clean they don't scratch or pick at their skin!

Hugs, Devastated
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Old 01-23-2010, 07:38 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Of course he's using. Given he is unemployed, I wonder the source of funds. Don't you? COuld there be a connection with Craig's List?

If all it took to snap someone out of it, was calling them on the carpet, none of us would be here. No one just snaps out of it.

When I used to try and reason with my daughter, it was all about my need to be in control. When my attempts failed, I felt diminished. It took time for me to get and be humbled that I have absolutely no control or influence over my daughter's choices and her choices have consequences.

How old is this guy who cannot sustain himself without his parent's help?
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Old 01-23-2010, 07:56 PM   #16 (permalink)
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hi, seems like you are putting a lot of effort into trying to figure out what is best for him, but you don't say much about what you feel is best for you personally aside from him, is there a reason why? or am i misunderstanding your post?

try to focus more on you/ what you want your life to look like with or without him and allow him the oportunity to figure out whats best for him on his own.
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Old 01-25-2010, 06:53 AM   #17 (permalink)
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sorry, but i sometimes speed-read through the posts, and i missed this:

I told him I cant do this, his behaviour was not normal.

you are absolutely right; this "forgot phone at home" and quick texts to make it look like he's connected to you ISN'T normal. i think that given that statement, it doesn't matter if he is using; you don't want this instability in your life.

and yes, i absolutely believe he's using, after reading the rest of the story
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Old 01-25-2010, 08:53 AM   #18 (permalink)
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"I try to encourage him and be that voice of reason."


I'm sorry to tell you this but YOU can't be his voice of reason. HE must be his own voice of reason...if that makes sense. YOU will literally drive yourself insane trying to be a voice of reason.

I only say this because this is exactly how I felt and exactly what I tried to do with my ex ABF who used meth. It does not work.. not when they are actively using drugs and in my opinion especially METH!

They can't hear you! That was the hardest thing I had to come to terms with. On top of that it was not MY job!

The text messages being ignored and the phone being dead were all the same things that my ex did when he was using.

Take care of YOU and only YOU!
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Old 01-25-2010, 09:29 AM   #19 (permalink)
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i am just writing another reply because there's only 1 "thanks" button.

right on, tchappy
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Old 01-25-2010, 09:41 AM   #20 (permalink)
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Nevermind, post not relevant.
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