Is this in any way healthy???

[wenchris]

I have my grandson this weekend, his biological parents are not allowed to see him or his brother right now because of dirty drug screens. I try to take one of the boys every few days to help all of the family cope with their care and care for ourselves, too. The boys are doing awesome, so healthy and happy; they are just amazing.

My son addicted to methadone relapsed ( his word) and has requested Suboxone treatment. I have agreed to pay for it for an undetermined period of time but he has to make the calls and get himself set up

My work with my son is now seeming seperate from my work with his children. I don't see the possibility of them together as any part of what I am willing to do now. My son will be able to get treatment that may or may not save his life, and I can afford him that choice. My grandchildren will continue to do well with their uncles and aunts and grandparents for as long as possible, and they will continue to be okay.

I do not even think of the kids being with their biological parents, anymore. I wonder what that means and what is going on in the subconscious part of my brain......maybe it is too stressful and too much of a leap of faith. Or maybe I am just in survival mode. I don't know. It feels crazy.

[Trofnelo]

It sounds to me like you're in acceptance of the present and how things really are. That is not crazy. It may just feel that way because being around addicts makes "crazy" feel normal cuz you feel that way so much of the time. So really since you feel normal healthy feelings right now it feels "crazy" just cuz you aren't used to it....make sense?

[laurie6781]

Sounds to me like you are definitely 'staying in today' and doing what is best for the children.

Makes sense to me. Good job!!!!!

J M H O

Love and hugs,

[marle]

Staying in today is my guess too. I know when my daughter was deep in her addiction I could not imagine her ever getting clean, so that became my normal. Today she is clean and until our blow up on Sunday, I thought things would continue to stay that way. Now I am kind of back to the Letting Go part although she is still clean today. So taking things one day at a time is a good thing. We cannot know the future and anyway who the heck would want to Hugs, Marle

[Troubledone]

There is nothing crazy about seeing how healthy and happy children can be when they are not exposed to adults in the grip of addiction.

Good for you that you can make the separation in your mind. Some folks can't make that separation and its the children who suffer.

None of us knows what will happen in the future, but continually playing scenarios and hopeing for some future outcome can sometimes burden what is possible in the present moment. It sounds to me (as others have said) that you are in the present, doing what is best here and now, without trying to project yourself into an uncertain future.

This sounds absolutely sane and smart to me.