very frustrated

[CrushedbyCrack]

THe only inpatient program in the entire county is full. No available beds. Every place says that this one place is the only place and they are always full. I feel like there is no help when he actually wants help. HE sincerely wants help and there is no place in the county to go without being on a waiting list! WTF??

[hello-kitty]

How about the next county over?

How about an NA meeting?

Who's doing all the calling? you or him?

If he truly wants help it's available. He just has to be willing to do whatever it takes.

I hope things work for him this time.

Are you drawing any boundaries about the kind of behavior that you find acceptable in your life - what if he decides that recovery just takes too much work and he has to go too far to get it??

[Done-With-It]

I feel like there is no help when he actually wants help.

Help is not as easy to get as some people think it is. I've always had to
fight to get help when I really wanted it. It's not always a bad thing, the
more we have to fight to get something often the more we appreciate it
and the harder we work once we get it.

I used to get jealous when I'd hear or see people who just got rehab/help
handed to them (or how it looked to me), or I didn't understand why wasn't it that
easy for me? But we just deal with the cards that are dealt to us and
use them the best way we can. Today I am grateful
that I had to fight to get where I am.
Whatever it takes....

{{{~~Don't lose hope~~}}}

[CrushedbyCrack]

Kitty,

HE is doing the calling
He is going to meetings, one tonight as a matter of fact
I have boundaries in place, he knows what they are and sticks to them. I did not ask him to go to treatment, he said he wanted to go
He needs inpatient, the only one within 100 miles that suits our needs is unavailable
As frustrated as I'm feeling, and I'm not even the addict here, it's no wonder there are so many addicts that give up hope.

[finallyout]

(((crushed))) i totally get your frustration. maybe this link will be helpful??? i'm not in your area so i don't know much about it, but here in pa, we have multiple Sal Val rehabs and i have literally dropped a friend at their doorstep once and they did get in right away.

http://www.stlsalvationarmyarc.org/Program%20Intro.htm

[greeteachday]

((((Crushed))))
It sure is frustrating...been there too and my daughter even had insurance coverage. But they seem to want you to fail repeatedly before considering in patient. Even then, she had to go 1,500 miles away to be covered (a process they do where they treat it like all day outpatient in terms of billing and just charge a very modest room and board fee...Whetever it takes I guess. But I know exactly what you mean about not even being the person with the addiction and being ready to scream. There truly are not enough rehabs or treatments avaialble, particularly to those who need it the most and can least afford it.

I hope that some of his friends in recovery may have some suggestions. If not inpatient, any chance of intensive outpatient and a recovery house?

Sending hugs...Don't give up hope...If he is ready and willing, something is coming.

[Troubledone]

I don't have any practical advice for this. The only thing I know is that we can only do what we can do and after that, were helpless.

I'm trying to learn to let go at that point and trust my HP that what happens is what is best to happen even if in the short term it lookds awful. I'm also trying to learn how to do what I can calmly and leave the outcome to my HP.

I hope you are able to have peace in the fact that you are doing what you can and the rest is, after all, up to the addict.

And it sounds like he's doing all the right things and he has you. I'm guessing that the meetings and your encouragement are worth a lot. The accomplishment of holding on until he gets to rehab could be an important accomplishment to hold on to later when he is through treatment and back in the world.

God Bless - prayers that you find a resource at exactly the right time (whatever that is).

[tiburon88]

It's a shame but one way many people get into a inpatient rehab is through the court system. Many times AA/NA meetings are not enough.


tib