pause to reflect....

[anvilhead]

as the last day of 2007 unfolds i suppose it's time to reflect a bit upon this past year. a year ago hank and i were living in a small rented cottage on the shores of puget sound....happy indeed, but still battling the 800 pound gorilla of crack addiction. my daughter who lived in LA at the time decided to move back "home" while she figured out the next steps to take in her life and asked if she could come stay with us....for awhile.

as much as i loved my kid, my first thought was "well that's gonna f*ck up the partying" - but not to look a gift horse in the mouth we agreed and in with us she moved. for seven months........long time for 3 adults in a small living space. and we were right, it really DID put a hamper on using........which was a very good thing indeed.

long about April we decided to expand our lives a little more and got a puppy, our boy Bucky, the beast from hell. many a sleepless night, thousands of trips of outside to piddle as we didnt' have a fenced yard, an abbreviated dog class.....a new little life to focus on, worry over, swear at...

we took him with us on our 5000 mile road trip to Wisconsin and back - stopping off to rent a houseboat for 4 days in Minnesota - visit the folks, made a quick tour thru his old town where so much of the "trouble" began.....so good to see his old pals, but so glad to leave. toured the Badlands, Mt Rushmore, Sturgis.......5000 miles and we were still speaking to each other when we got home!

thought maybe it was time for us to look into buying our own home - being nomads gets a little wearing in your 40's....figured we've been together this long, no signs of anyone making a break out the side door. spoke with my ex and we came to a mutually agreeable early settlement payout for my "interest" in the house i'd cheerfully left him as a parting gift.

so we looked and i'd get excited about the first property i saw, and then disillusioned and hank just tried to ride out the emotional upheaval. i had to do some work on our finances and credit to put us in the best position for a loan...it took time, but not that much. one day we decided maybe to slow down a bit, let the Universe have a chance to work some things out - just had to pry my sticky busy fingers off the process.

turns out our neighbor 4 doors down, who we'd always chat with when he came to check his mail, talk about how Bucky was growing, what a lousy job we were doing of training him, etc, just happened to be a real estate agent. go figure. one day he pulls up and says "guys i have this property i really think you should go take a look at"........

we completed the offer paperwork the evening of nov 6, it was accepted nov 7.........we closed nov 20th. we cleaned and scrubbed and painted and refinished the hardwoods and had new carpet installed and moved and set up shop and spent our first Christmas in our new house - my daughter who now only lives 5 miles away spent Christmas Eve with us, made camp on the couch, played with her "furry brother"........

life is good. long as we stay off the sh!t. long as we do the next WISE thing and always remember we are no more than a couple bad decisions away from disaster. i walk thru my house with my arms extended, trying to hug it all, absorb it all, embrace it all.........and say thank you over and over.........feeling so blessed, wanting to give that energy back out.......humbled by the enormity of this opportunity, fiercely determined not to screw it up.

the job ahead of us now seems endless........yet each day is truly a new beginning.........

[mooselips]

(((anvilhead)))
Thanks for sharing, what an inspiring story.
You sound as if you have it together, and working one day at a time on your recovery.

I am so happy for you both...

[Stellargirl]

fiercely determined not to screw it up.

May the fierceness of your determination become tenfold and may you found unknown strength to follow through on your dreams and goals.

Thank you for sharing, glad to hear things are going well!
I agree with others, it's so great to have you here with your honest advice!

Stay strong and Busy!

[kj21]

Thanks for sharing, you always give very good advice. Sometimes the kick I need!

[cinderellawkids]

I love having you around ANvil. Youve truly helped me survive this year. My year has been one drma after another good and bad, beginning with a new home, separations and the year went out with the dramatic bang of my SUV stolen and wrecked, who would have thought...

Im so glad I learned to really apply the serenity prayer otherwise I surely would ahve killed someone by now

[bookmiser]

I am so very happy for you, Anvil. It's such a rewarding experience
buying a house. It can also be a pain in the a$$, though. lol
Enjoy the moment. Your update is truly a good one and I'm so glad
your determined to "not screw it up". lol
I've said this before and I'll say it again. You have extreme writing talent.
I seriously think you should consider writing your story.
It would be great reading, I just know.
Sincerely, one of your biggest fans,
Linda

[marteen]

Best of luck - one day at a time!

Hugs,
Marteen