Venting....grrrr!!!

[duet_4-8]

Hi guys,
Just need to vent a little. So, I told you that we went to mediation a week ago last Friday. And that when I told the judge that I didn't want the house and my ex can have it, he then said he didn't want it either and we should sell it. Went so far as to say if it didn't sell by June that we needed to put it up for auction! Refused to help pay the home owner's insurance, the land taxes, and didn't want me to be reimbursed at the date of sale for any thing that I have to do to get it ready to list (most of which, btw, are the result of the many projects he started and then never finished...).

All year-ever since we seperated and I got to stay in the house with my son-my stbx has complained loud and long to anyone who would listen that this is HIS house, HE built it, HE wanted it, HE would get it, and on and on and on. So, I decided not to fight it, right? God pretty much laid the 'Rockin' C' right in my lap, and I said 'thank you very much, I'll take it'.

So now, tonight, I get this nasty voice mail from ex saying 'I hope you have the decency not to sell *my* house. I worked (excuse me???) my whole life for that place!'.....quack quack quack......'I wanted to keep it but you want me to give you money for it!!' (Uh, hello, that's what happens in a divorce.....and didn't you sign that paper in the judge's office saying you wanted it sold????) GGEEEZZZ!!!!!



OK, I feel better now....I hope this is not the start of another round of harrassment. He's either using again or he has completely destroyed a large portion of his brain cells over the years.....

[outonalimb]

Vent away, Jen...

I hope today is a better one for you !!!!!

[guineapigjude]

Ah Jen, the joys of divorcing your A!
Just like when we lived with them, during the divorce they blow with the wind. And this time they aren't even going to pretend they're concerned for us. Now they can really alter the truth to fit their agenda!
All circumstances are different. With my A, I picked my battles. My only "want" out of the whole deal was the kids and their safety. I gave XAH just about everything he wanted, leaving me with nothing (even though I'm the only one who brought any $ into the marriage and the only one who never once missed bringing in a paycheck.....) But I got full physical custody and he only gets visitation as I agree to it. (Sad thing is he never even had any demands concerning the kids ... just about money.)
Don't let him get to you. You're almost out. Let 'em quack, it's what they do best!

[pjbs55]

Jen,
Divorce is hard no matter what. But I'm sure it is no fun dealing with an A during it. Your stbex sounds a like mine, not an A. Tells you one thing and others something different.
Sending you prayers that this over sooner rather than later.
Hugs

[duet_4-8]

Thanks guys. I'm just going forward as planned with some repairs that needed to be done outside. God has graciously blessed me with a few days of record-setting warm weather for this time of year, allowing me to paint a couple of entry doors and clean the posts on on the porch and carport. Also, a close friend of my son's started last night dismantling the *leaking* hot tub that ex bought SEVEN YEARS AGO and never once got working, along with tearing down the 'deck' around it that one needed a ladder to get to because ex never put stairs or a railing around it even though the lumber for this has literally laid on the patio for the last seven years as well...... It was a huge eye-sore in our otherwise very pretty backyard; totally blocked the view of the mountains behind us when looking out the kitchen window. The realtor told me the deck would have to be finished and the spa would have to be in working order when we list, so when the guy called and asked if I would sell it, I was like 'how fast can you get here??'.

Hi ho, hi ho, it's off to work I go.........

[frankie_b]

It takes a woman to get the job done! Happy work day and happy selling of the house. You are so competent, capable and resilient...so he says this and he says that and it's all crazy bs.
My first husband, not an A, lost his abilities to reason at divorce time. He had a brilliant mind and a PhD too. Go figure
I just kept on keeping on and took care of what I needed to do. Every time he started bs I very calmly, competently said...take it up with your attorney. Well, that stopped the bs fast. He wasn't about to waste his money bsing the attorney.
Vent away woman...

[duet_4-8]

Well, I got the door sanded, primed and I started painting it. Worked on that sucker for most of eight hours before I had to leave to go to class last night. Will be back at it this morning. I really enjoyed it! It was almost 75 degrees here yesterday! I popped on my iPod and just painted away! Hopefully I can finish it today; I have baby Shelby, though, so we'll see if she cooperates and is happy in her playpen out there with me..

Got another voice mail last night, this one had no mention of the house. Just that he wanted to know where to leave me a check (which I have heard several times over the last nine months and have yet to actually SEE).

The money would be nice, but I'm not holding my breath.....

[Jwife22]

(((duet))) It feels so good outside doesn't it! I'm not in Tenn but in SC and it is almost 80 degrees here!!!! Woo hoo-----it ends this weekend though.

Good for you for getting all that stuff done around the house. It is a lot of work but the oh so rewarding feeling that we have when we are done is so worth it.

Keep on keeping on Duet!

[guineapigjude]

Okay, okay. Enough you lucky southern girls! LOL. We're gearing for a couple of nor'easter's here!