Today's Gift Daily Reader

Old 02-08-2017, 11:24 PM
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Always ~ your posts and images are wonderful!
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Old 02-09-2017, 12:27 PM
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February 9, 2017

Leave yourself alone.

—Jenny Janacek


Three women were talking. One blamed herself for an unkind remark someone had made to her. Another blamed herself for not getting work done. The other compared her looks to those of the movie stars and thought she was ugly.

The women each noticed how the other two had put themselves down without being aware of it, and they began to laugh. Then they vowed to be as kind to themselves as they were to each other. Each time they caught themselves being mean to themselves, they imagined they were their own best friend, and were as understanding to themselves as they were to one another. When we are kind to ourselves, only then can we be truly kind to others, and make ourselves a gift to those around us.

How have I been kind to myself lately?



This reading is from Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation, posted on the "Thought for the Day" page at the Hazelden/Betty Ford Foundation web site. Additional daily readings can be found here: Thought for the Day | Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.
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Old 02-10-2017, 10:56 AM
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A bird does not sing because he has an answer. He sings because he has a song.

—Joan Walsh Anglund


Each of us has a song to sing, just as birds do. Part of knowing who we are is appreciating our own songs. Are our songs gentle like the robin's, or are we brilliant leaders like the bluejay? Are we easy to be around like the sparrow, or do we radiate joy and laughter like the loon?

Each of these birds has something special to offer. So do we, with our own unique personalities and talents. What a waste it would be if the loon never dashed across the lake because he wanted to be a robin instead. It is important to learn who we are and to believe we are special in our own way. We give joy to the world around us when we sing our own songs.

Have I listened to my own song lately?



This reading is from Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation, posted on the "Thought for the Day" page at the Hazelden/Betty Ford Foundation web site. Additional daily readings can be found here: Thought for the Day | Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.
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Old 02-11-2017, 10:58 AM
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Life deals more rigorously with some than others.

—Lewis F. Presnall


How often we think about a friend, He sure is lucky! And probably just as often we say to ourselves, Why did that happen to me? It's not fair! The truth is, life isn't always fair. We don't all get the same experiences, the same lessons. But we each learn what we need to learn in order to fulfill our destiny.

We have to learn to trust. Maybe a bike gets stolen or a friend moves away. It's not easy to accept such things as these, but we must all learn to understand and accept losses in our lives.

Perhaps we fail a test. The lesson we learn from this may be to study harder or to consider a different course of study in school. There are always reasons for why things happen, but we don't have to know them.

Can I trust in the lessons of my failures today?



This reading is from Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation, posted on the "Thought for the Day" page at the Hazelden/Betty Ford Foundation web site. Additional daily readings can be found here: Thought for the Day | Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.
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Old 02-12-2017, 03:27 AM
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February 12, 2017

Oh, a trouble's a ton, or a trouble's an ounce, Or a trouble is what you make it, And it isn't the fact that you're hurt that counts, But only how you take it.

—Edmund Vance Cooke


Once a woman decided to throw a problem-exchange party. As guests arrived, they shed all their personal problems and tossed them onto a pile with everyone else's. After all had discussed their own problem for others to hear, the party ended with guests selecting from the problem pile those they wished to carry away. Each person left with the same troubles he or she had brought to the party.

We who worry a great deal about our problems are always sure no one else has troubles as bad as ours. Too often, we complain, "If you had my problems, you'd really hurt." Our problems are tailored to us, and geared to help us learn by solving them. No one else's would be quite right.

When we cope with problems, rather than wailing about them, we discover that our own are minor irritations compared to those we see in others.

What problems am I lucky to have?



This reading is from Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation, posted on the "Thought for the Day" page at the Hazelden/Betty Ford Foundation web site. Additional daily readings can be found here: Thought for the Day | Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.
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Old 02-12-2017, 01:12 PM
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No idea how you manage to post the exact thing I need to read dearest honey....thank you so very much love.

(And sure, it's all about me, LOL...just very grateful right now. ♥)
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Old 02-13-2017, 09:04 AM
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February 13, 2017

"Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her.

—James Barrie


If kisses can be made of acorn buttons, they can be made of any good thing. Think of kisses made of candy. Therefore, there must be a thousand and one ways to give a kiss. We can give one made of wildflowers picked in the ditch, the melody in a music box, the few true words in a note, or the picture we ourselves draw to give to the one we love. Think of how we can hide them here and there under pillows, in corners, in pockets where they're sure to be seen and felt. Think of how hearts kiss when we hug or hold hands, how sleeping beauties suddenly wake up.

Does it matter that we try new ways to show our same old love?



This reading is from Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation, posted on the "Thought for the Day" page at the Hazelden/Betty Ford Foundation web site. Additional daily readings can be found here: http://www.hazeldenbettyford.org/rec...ht-for-the-day
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Old 02-14-2017, 10:41 AM
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February 14, 2017

Love cures people - both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it.
—Karl Menninger

Receiving a loving hug from a parent or perhaps a smile from a friend or even a stranger gives us a special feeling inside. We know we are important to others when they show us their love through attention. And we sometimes forget that we matter to others. Family members and friends feel good in the same way when we show them our love. Everyone needs to be loved.

How can we show our love? Must it be through a hug? Doing a favor for someone is loving. Helping around the house or the yard is loving, particularly when we've volunteered our help. Giving an unexpected gift to a friend is a way of showing love. Showing others we care, even when they are angry, is perhaps the nicest of all expressions of love.

What new way can I show someone I care today?



This reading is from Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation, posted on the "Thought for the Day" page at the Hazelden/Betty Ford Foundation web site. Additional daily readings can be found here: Thought for the Day | Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.
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Old 02-15-2017, 10:50 AM
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February 15, 2017

It is always a mistake not to close one's eyes, whether to forgive or to look better into oneself.

—Maurice Maeterlinck


It is easy to look outward and find faults with the world and people around us. We criticize family members or complain about our friends. We always notice disease in the trees around us.

But if we take time to be quiet, to sit alone in a tree or by a lake, we become more aware of how connected we are to the life around us. We are part of the beauty and the imperfection. When we notice our own tree is not perfect, it becomes easier to forgive the blights of those around us. It is also important to forgive ourselves our faults. Though all the trees are beautiful, they each have their scars. Being human means we are, like all humanity, both beautiful and imperfect.

Will I see through the flaws to another's beauty today?



This reading is from Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation, posted on the "Thought for the Day" page at the Hazelden/Betty Ford Foundation web site. Additional daily readings can be found here: Thought for the Day | Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.
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Old 02-15-2017, 10:50 PM
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February 16, 2017

Shame-filled people feel that something is wrong at their very core. It is a sense of being bad . . .

—Susan Kwiecien


Nobody is rotten to the core. Whenever we start to believe we are bad all the way through, we can picture good things we have done, days when someone else was happy to be with us, and see for ourselves that we have many good points that outweigh the bad.

If we have done something wrong, we must apologize and make amends. Making a mistake is not the same as being worthless. Mistakes are a natural part of living, not something to be ashamed of. Our freedom to make mistakes is one of our greatest assets, for this is the way we learn humility, persistence, courage to take risks, and better ways of doing things. All of us are valuable and lovable. How could we be otherwise? Since mistakes are natural aspects of growth, we can salute them in others and ourselves as signs of life and celebrate our ability to learn and to forgive.

What mistakes have helped me grow?



This reading is from Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation, posted on the "Thought for the Day" page at the Hazelden/Betty Ford Foundation web site. Additional daily readings can be found here: Thought for the Day | Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.
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Old 02-15-2017, 10:55 PM
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"Don't cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it."

Just wonderful. It seems as if this should be common sense ~ but it sure isn't for me.
Thank you dear honey. Your posts resonate so deeply with me.
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Old 02-15-2017, 11:10 PM
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venuscat, someone posted here about how, years ago, she and her friend were making fun of Cher's extremely short marriage to Greg Allman. The poster's father said "there's nothing wrong with admitting a mistake as soon as you know you've made it." And that stuck w/her up until the present.

It was a revelation for me too--the idea that I could look at an action, a situation, whatever, and go "you know, this is a mistake" and get started right away w/fixing the problem, heading a different direction, whatever it takes to move on. I'd always felt that I needed to hang on like grim death, trying and persisting and struggling, contorting myself and the situation to try to make it work, dammit...b/c if only I try hard enough, it HAS to work!

And the results of that were predictably bad. Yep, that member's father was a wise man--realize and admit your mistake, learn what you can from it, and move on w/your new insight tucked inside to help you along the way.

It is so freeing when I remember to do this!

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Old 02-15-2017, 11:24 PM
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Thank you so so much ~ I realise my mistake, and even though I move forward to rectify it, I punish myself incessantly. Totally counterproductive.

And if you don't mind, I am going to borrow the above quote for my 24-hour list post.

So much love and gratitude. ♥♥
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Old 02-17-2017, 01:52 PM
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February 17, 2017

There is glory in a great mistake.

—Nathalia Crane


Once there was a big girl who liked to play with little kids and their toys. One day she rode one of their small bikes and her foot slipped off the little pedal and her leg got caught and dragged along the sidewalk.

She went home, limping and howling. Her mother put ice on the terrible scrape. The next day, the girl's mother told her she was too big for the little kids' toys. The girl looked up defiantly and said, "I can TOO ride that baby bike."

The girl's mother didn't say anything else. She knew people must be free to make mistakes. We cannot protect another person from the experiences of the world. It would be harmful to both of us to try.

What mistakes have I made more than once before I learned my lesson?



This reading is from Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation, posted on the "Thought for the Day" page at the Hazelden/Betty Ford Foundation web site. Additional daily readings can be found here: Thought for the Day | Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.
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Old 02-18-2017, 02:53 AM
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February 18, 2017

United souls are not satisfied with embraces, but desire to be truly each other.

—Sir Thomas Browne


If hugs could melt, if kisses were made of nothing but pure air, if talkers always agreed, and if hearts all beat to the same drum, would we desire any longer to be truly each other? No two leaves on a tree turn the same way in the wind; no two fish in a school tread the same water; and no two people can live the same life. Therefore, when we hug, let's leave some space; when we kiss, let's allow each other to breathe; when we talk, let's permit each other to disagree; and when we love, let's honor each other's rhythm and way.

Is it our similarities or differences that make us want to know each other better?



This reading is from Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation, posted on the "Thought for the Day" page at the Hazelden/Betty Ford Foundation web site. Additional daily readings can be found here: Thought for the Day | Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.
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Old 02-19-2017, 05:11 AM
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February 19, 2017

I have often thought morality may perhaps consist solely in the courage of making a choice.

—Leon Blum


Sometimes trying to do the right thing isn't easy because it isn't what we want to do. For instance, we may want to sneak a cookie to take to bed with us, or we may want to stay out late. But is that the right thing to do?

One way to tell is to think how we'll feel after we've done it. Will we be happy, or will we feel guilty because we know in our hearts it is wrong? On the other hand, how would we feel if we resisted the temptation? Perhaps we'd feel great because we'd know in our hearts we'd done the right thing. And don't we deserve to feel good about ourselves? Of course we do!

How wonderful it is that our feelings can help us do the right thing when we're in doubt.

Will I have the courage to follow my true feelings today?



This reading is from Today's Gift: Daily Meditations for Families ©1985, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation, posted on the "Thought for the Day" page at the Hazelden/Betty Ford Foundation web site. Additional daily readings can be found here: Thought for the Day | Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation.
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Old 02-19-2017, 06:41 AM
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I have mixed feelings (if you'll pardon the expression) about that one. Feelings are what get a lot of us into trouble. We FEEL that this or that is gonna happen, or we FEEL that we can't survive without the alcoholic (or that s/he can't survive without us), or we FEEL that other people will judge us harshly for leaving, or we FEEL that we are stuck with our lives as they are.

As we often say around here, "feelings aren't FACTS." So yeah, I think we have to take our feelings into account, and not ignore them (because occasionally they are right on the money), but I certainly wouldn't suggest that someone wrapped in the chaos of an alcoholic relationship make decisions based on them.

Just a counterpoint.
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Old 02-19-2017, 06:52 AM
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Lexie, as time goes by and I read more and more, I've begun to see contradictions too. In fact, sometimes when I'm looking for that day's picture/quote, I'll come across something that makes me want to scream--today I saw one that said "the more I and me are in the relationship, the less room for we and our." Is there anything worse that could possibly be said to so many here? But to say that selfishness isn't a problem for anyone wouldn't be true either.

How do I know when to ignore those feelings and just go by facts? Well, usually I just try to trust my gut...
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Old 02-19-2017, 06:59 AM
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Well, I think as with most things, balance is the key. The thing is, one thing in short supply for most people in a relationship with an alcoholic is any reasonable way to achieve balance. When the other person is randomly jumping up and down on the other end of the teeter-totter, we tend to either be sitting with our butts in the dirt or get sent flying off the other end.

I think some of these meditations work better once you're in a stable place, rather than trying to figure out how to put out fires. Remember, a lot of these are meant for people well into recovery, but there maybe should be a warning label for those just starting out.
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Old 02-19-2017, 07:03 AM
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Originally Posted by LexieCat View Post
I think some of these meditations work better once you're in a stable place, rather than trying to figure out how to put out fires. Remember, a lot of these are meant for people well into recovery, but there maybe should be a warning label for those just starting out.
Oddly enough, they are all from the same book, as noted at the bottom of each post. I agree, though, that some are definitely not for those whose heads are still spinning from living w/an active addict.
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