honeypig

That seems to be a good marker--altho I don't know if it was specifically mentioned in Wisconsin's thread about healthy relationships...maybe it should be added!

firebolt

HP I wish! Sadly XABF like to fish as much as me too....it just wasn't really fishing to him without the $13 handle of vodka in the cooler though.

Although...new guy said he wants to like ice fishing, but doesn't because everyone just seems to want to get drunk. Haha - no red flags in the first couple phones calls - which is more than I can say for most of my exes

Liveitwell

Grateful my home didn't get damaged by the crazy hail storms that rolled through Texas recently....it was a scary night but we, our home and car are all good!

honeypig

Glad to hear that, FoG--my dad lives in Texas now w/his current wife and they lost the glass out of their cars plus apparently major damage to roof and siding of their place...

The website for the place I work has made it possible for other employees to donate paid time off hours specifically to be used by Texas employees who have been affected by the severe weather/flooding. I'm turning in my donation sheet today and suggested to my boss that we put out a stack of forms plus a brief description of what it's about near the drivers' mailboxes as well as in the break room. Most drivers don't spend much time in the office and most don't visit the website often, so I think many will never know about this opportunity to help out otherwise. Plus it will catch the attention of the office workers too, I hope...

I always get just this sick feeling when I see footage of flooding and flood damage--I can't imagine everything a person owned, soaked and ruined and buried under slimy mud, how awful.

firebolt

Grateful for some family time this week for the nieces choir concert - and for super sunny days, blooming flowers, birds chirping...all that.

OH - grateful for the BLOCK function on my phone. XABF tried to call last night - I let the block do it's job, and fell asleep reading. No stewing, no wondering, no nothing...happy to feel my recovery last night.

honeypig

Grateful to have gotten my whole lawn mowed yesterday--I am certainly not someone who has ever had (or ever wants) one of those perfectly manicured lawns, but I do feel a sense of accomplishment when it's all nice and freshly mowed and looks neat!

The only problem w/working second shift is that normally, after doing the lawn, I'd sit in a lawn chair and drink a beer and gloat. That didn't seem like a good idea, seeing as how I had to be to work in an hour....dang.

LexieCat

Got some unexpected good-ish news today. The nurse who originally set up my lung cancer screening called to see if I ever received my results. I told her I was told I had to come in to meet with the pulmonologist to discuss it--which wasn't what I'd been hoping to hear. She had the results in front of her, and she said there was a small non-suspicious nodule--very common and very rarely malignant--but that they wanted me to come back for another scan in six months just to be sure it hadn't changed.

That was pretty much what I figured, since they gave me an appointment three weeks out, but it was good to have that confirmed. From what I've read, it's extremely common (and one of the downsides of the screening program--lots of unnecessary concern). Still, if it were to identify something serious, best to get a jump on it.

As it is, it reduces a bit of low-level stress I was feeling, not knowing what they would tell me at this appointment.

Also on the up side, I decided to ditch my previous once-a-day cigarettes (my one in the morning I had with my coffee). I don't really need it with the e-cigs, and it's an unnecessary risk I was taking out of pure nostalgia. I can do without it, and reduce any residual risk.

firebolt

Lexi - so glad they aren't concerned about your scan, and you can rest fairly easy about it!

Grateful for the weekend - excited to mushroom hunt, and go on a ride in the Canadian smoke - Poor Alberta.

Liveitwell

Grateful for the great sermon this morning. We visited a new church and the pastor is a recovered alcoholic. Oh my goodness did he speak unabashed truth. I found myself crying. It was amazing. Grateful my kids also listened to the message about not being slaves to our flesh and our sins. Just beyond grateful today!

Yurt

Grateful that my DD is coming home from college in....about an hour. I am excited for her to see my new home. I have been here two weeks, but today was the first real chance that I had to start putting things where I want them. I am also grateful that my XAH went to fetch her and is making the 3 hour drive. Unfortunately, it seems that they are at odds today, but not surprising.
I will share her company with my XAH for the next three weeks until she is off to Europe for a four week study abroad opportunity. Really excited for her.
One last thing...my wedding is in 4 weeks. Seems impossible, but it is really happening. I am hoping it will all come together.

honeypig

Grateful for the things XAH gave me while he was still able to give them.

Liveitwell

^ I agree. Grateful for those, too.

jada1981

Grateful I survived my first Mother's Day since STBXAH moved out and it was actually pretty nice. He took the kids for the day and I was able to get a lot done, then he picked up dinner and we all ate as a family.

Wisconsin

Big hugs to you, my friend.

I am grateful for that, too. Amazingly, it has actually made it easier to keep my mind clear and my head on straight during these past few weeks as he spirals down into what may, or may not, be his rock bottom. He will always be in my heart, and although I am sad for his suffering, I can remember the good and hope his path takes him toward recovery, for his own sake.

I am grateful for a nice Mother's Day. My gentleman friend came with his daughter, and we took the kids on a walk/hike in a park very close to my apartment. My daughters (obviously with the help of their father, who was my first husband and is not an A but with whom I had a very, very difficult relationship for the first several years after our divorce) bought me a food processor: something that had been on my wish list for a very long time. It's nothing fancy, but it will do everything I need it to do, and should last for many years. I am ALSO grateful that their father and I have both been able to grow and move beyond the challenges that faced us after our divorce. DS gave me a little tiny flower pot he made at school. He also gave me a balloon and some tulips last week when I picked him up from STBXAH's. My gentleman friend's daughter made me a necklace and several pictures during her occupational therapy sessions with her school aide last week. The weather was perfect, and during our hike we made our way down to a rocky beach where the kids spent a long time throwing rocks into Lake Michigan.

STBXAH called me in the evening to tell me that he knows it can be a difficult day for me, having lost my own mother four years ago. He continues to struggle greatly with the aftermath of his drinking and abuse of me. It would not surprise me if he dug his Big Book out over the weekend, because he dropped some recovery lingo. At one point he said that he knows the time is not right for him to make amends to my daughters directly, but that he hoped I would tell them that he is deeply sorry for how his behavior affected them over the years. I am sad for him, and will always hope that he can choose a different path for his own sake, but it was amazing to be able to feel those things without taking his pain on as my own, and to NOT feel overwhelmed by a desire to fix the situation, or to fix him.

honeypig

Wisconsin, I'm glad to hear you had such a lovely time at the lakeshore yesterday! I am somewhat familiar w/some of the parks near the lake in that area and can imagine how lovely it was under the sunny blue skies to wander the edge of the lake, listening to the little waves lapping the shore.

This
is just wonderful. Again, I am so happy for you in your growth!

FireSprite

Amen, Sisters. Grateful for seeing every day as the gift that it can be, the chance to start over in any & every way, big or small. WE are writing OUR stories, after all, right?

I'm so grateful for understanding the need for reasonable expectations ~ it's just another way of saying "staying in balance" to me now. It used to sound like "giving up" something or lowering standards in some way but ...semantics, schemantics...... I had to adjust my perspective around it & remove the negative connotation.

I also had to own that the "unreasonable" part was often on me - not others. Sometimes it was me treating assumptions as fact or blindly ignoring reality while I built my expectations of others out of my own wants & needs & labels/definitions. That's not fair & I don't appreciate it at all when others do it to me now that I can "see" it clearly.

I'm also simplistically happy to have finally found a purse that I love. I've been hunting for months - seriously MONTHS - for the exact right one - size, color, #/ration of pockets, etc. I finally found a used knock-off Prada bag at our Hope Chest (Hope Hospice's charity store like Goodwill). It's perfect!!

firebolt

Grateful for a fun, relaxing yet productive weekend. I found 2, yes 2 morels. They were lovely on my burger last night. I rode 100 miles on my Honda 350 for a breakfast run yesterday - that is an ENDURANCE run on a bike that tiny, and it was so much fun.

Hope all you mamas, and dads that have to be the mama too had a GREAT mothers day weekend!

honeypig

Congratulations, oh mighty morel hunter!

TropicalWinter

My oldest son was born on Mother's Day 13 years ago. He is such a joy to parent, truly a dream child (now young man). My kids are my WHY - while it's been SO hard, I'm glad to be free from the hell of living with an addict, glad for myself, but even moreso for them. I know they love their dad, but we're all better off with him out of our home.

I am also thankful for the opportunity to go back to school to make myself actually marketable so I can eventually get a good job to support us. Last week was finals week, the close of my second semester back. I somehow managed to get A's in all my classes - it was not easy, but I did it! I start my summer class next week, taking my last prerequisite before I start the actual MLT program in the fall.

I have so much to be thankful for.

FireSprite

I never thought I'd be grateful to be able to say that:

I MADE A MISTAKE.

A pretty darn big one too. And while I was stewing in it, I immediately started a manipulative convo with RAH trying to draw him into an argument to give me a reason to vent my self-anger.

I REALLY never thought I'd be happy to say that he called me on it right away & that I had to own my Codie Blameshifting Meltdown AND my imperfection.

Having a less-than-awesome day here folks, but it's OK. Tomorrow will be a New Day!