I'm moving....

[marblack]

Hi ALL,
I am getting ready to move. I have been packing boxes for a few days. I sober b/f just doesn't think I am serious. He told me this morning you just cann't move out. He has treated me and my kids terrible. Now that he is sober his attitude hasn't gotten better. We cann't stand being in a room together. Tonight we went to watch the Vikes and the 49'ers play. We were in the van 10 mins then a agrument started. I mentioned somethng and he got pissed. I asked a question and he got pissed. Sulled like a kid. I asked him why cann't we be mature and talk about issues. Instead its my fault for asking the question. His reply you knew I would be upset. Why did you ruin the evening. I feel as if I am backstabbing him for leaving. I am signing my lease monday. He doesn't know. I am just going to come in an announce I am leaving I am afraid and relieved at the same time. I do love him. But fighting everyday isn't worth it. He would just rather not talk to me. I longed for him to be sober. Funny when he is sober...we cann't get along. He is bitter for me sending him to detox. what the hell. was I supposed to just wait until I was carried out in a body bag. This hurts me too leaving. I am beating my self up inside. I can't take the loneliness anymore. Any advice please...Mary

[best]

Your doing what you feel needs to be done and the result of your actions may be just the thing he will need to WAKE UP and see where he needs to seek changes. Changes can come if he is willing to "work" the steps. Not because you asked him to but because he sees the need and wants to.
You need to look out for yourself and your children. If he seeks change...the future can be rearanged. For now and till then...yes keep watching out for you and doing what you need to do.

[Alexia]

Jeeze Marblack I'm right where you are. Although I have been separated 5 months, and he just quit drinking 5 weeks ago, he's a miserable human and all we do is fight.
I told him thismorning to stop coming over to my house until he decides that he truely wants a happy life, and is willing to do something about it. I refuse to be miserable.

You do what you need to do and have confidence and strength to stay the course, whatever that course may be. I am living proof and truely believe that God answers our prayers.

[Magichappens]

((Mary))
My suggestion is to find an Al-Anon meeting. You need to fill that loneliness with support and love. Of course we are here for you. But I have found that I can't let go of something without replacing it. If I don't replace it with something healthy, I will replace it with something unhealthy. I will either go back to what I had, or find something that is the same.

It's not easy to make ourselves reach out, but it is worth it. Wishing you the best and good luck with your move. Hugs, Magic