Struggling with guilt
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 129
Originally Posted by Drunkwriter 
... she always had a choice to come home. She just had to do that one thing...stop drinking.
And this is why I come to SR and cherish each and every one of you here. So many perspectives... so much wisdom, support and compassion. I am particularly touched by your response drunkwriter. Thank you... Thank ALL of you!
I will continue to work on me, and take many of the suggestions here... starting with already ordering Melody's book.
Peace and happiness to all of you.
Woodman
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 2,805
Woodman, my mother's alcoholism is what made me stop drinking almost 18 months ago. I have children and I could not bear to impose the pain on them that my mother's alcoholism has imposed on to me. I could see the writing on the wall, that my drinking was going to head in the same direction as my mother's if I didn't quit. I can tell you now that from the deepest part of myself, the part that is the fiercest mother bear that I would want my children (and my husband) protected from me if I got as sick in my disease as end stage alcoholics get. Once they are at end stage, they are no longer themselves, only shells. Shells full of denial and self-pity. I thank God every day for the grace he gave me to see where I was headed when I still had any semblance of control. I have told my husband more than once that if I ever got to the stage my mother is at and refused to help myself, please leave and take the children with you. I think your wife felt the same way at one time, even if she didn't verbalize it.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 42
My husband died last year and I understand your pain. AH told me that if I let him stay in our garage he would drink less and felt he could finally kick drinking and drugs completely. I let him stay and his drinking and drug use increased. I didn't think he would stop completely but I never expected to see him get worse.
In my opinion, you did what you had to do and you have nothing to feel guilty about. Losing someone to this disease sucks and my heart goes out to you.
In my opinion, you did what you had to do and you have nothing to feel guilty about. Losing someone to this disease sucks and my heart goes out to you.
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