Things a "normie" wouldn't know.... Part 3

Old 09-12-2013, 10:49 AM
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Carlotta, yes, I am out.......

Normies dont know that you seek out forums so that you can "Pay if Forward" for all of the help that you got from complete compassionate strangers.



SR helped me find serenity. It has helped me so much, I can't even begin to thank everyone here.

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Old 09-12-2013, 11:42 AM
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Normies don't know what it's like to think that the only way their partner will learn is if the worst case scenario actually plays out. And normies certainly don't know what it's like to witness that worst case scenario happen, and it never actually registers with their partner that it was the result of his/her actions. But he/she plays the victim role like a champ!
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Old 09-12-2013, 11:46 AM
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Normies don't have neighbors they have never talked to before introduce themselves by saying, "So you're married to the guy who reminds of Otis the drunk from the Andy Griffith Show. No wait. Otis was lovable. Your husband looks scary. So I guess you're just the wife of a mean drunk." It's pretty bad when Otis the drunk seems like a much better mate than the man you are married to.
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Old 09-12-2013, 11:49 AM
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Normies don't wonder if the guy at the grocery store checkout can smell the alcohol and see their glassy eyes and if they think I am the same way!
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Old 09-12-2013, 11:51 AM
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Originally Posted by wysiwyg View Post
Normies don't know what it's like to think that the only way their partner will learn is if the worst case scenario actually plays out. And normies certainly don't know what it's like to witness that worst case scenario happen, and it never actually registers with their partner that it was the result of his/her actions. But he/she plays the victim role like a champ!
I know exactly what you mean. There were so many times with my husband when I thought once this awful thing happens he will finally see the light. But he never saw it as consequences of his behavior. They are experts at twisting things around and making themselves into the victim.
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Old 09-12-2013, 02:41 PM
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Normies don't look at their outgoing calls and see a slew of numbers that i know i didnt dial at all hours of the night ....then realize that it was the A who went through the list of incoming calls and dialed all the "suspicious" looking numbers.....yup, that was my A...Please tell me again why I was thinking about him and miss him!?!?!
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Old 09-12-2013, 05:17 PM
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So true.....

Normies also don't know that you have to hide all the phone numbers of family members, hide phone bills, and erase phone memories so that the A in their life doesn't start calling them at all hours, trying to cause chaos, and wonder why no one wants to talk to him
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Old 09-12-2013, 06:14 PM
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Originally Posted by sunshine17 View Post
So true.....

Normies also don't know that you have to hide all the phone numbers of family members, hide phone bills, and erase phone memories so that the A in their life doesn't start calling them at all hours, trying to cause chaos, and wonder why no one wants to talk to him
I love how the iPhone has a "hide contacts" feature!!
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Old 09-12-2013, 06:38 PM
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A normie doesn't know that feeling of being disappointed ...not in their spouse, but in themselves for thinking this time would be different. lol. It's a messed up cycle.
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Old 09-12-2013, 06:57 PM
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A normie wouldnt read through this thread and relate to every post, yet cry herself to sleep every night for the past 9 months because despite the turmoil and pain her AH caused, the most painful moment so far was when he ran away.
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Old 09-12-2013, 08:15 PM
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Normies don't know that when you take out the recycling you're also supposed to check in the bathroom cabinets and under the couch for "hidden" beer bottles.
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Old 09-12-2013, 11:25 PM
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After finding a bottle of schnapps hidden in the trash, normies don't listen to their abf tell them that it was her fault, because it was in plain sight in the crisper, and if he wasn't suppose to drink it, she should have said something. And continue to listen to him rant because she "dug" through the trash.
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Old 09-12-2013, 11:34 PM
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Normies don't enter into agreement with a drunk.
Normies don't have to put more negotiation into the drinking agreement than went into the Geneva Convention.. " only x and y per night, unless my son is not home then it's x and y and z and l, except on "special" occasions when all restrictions are lifted and abf can drink as much as he wants, which will end at midnight on the night of "special" occasion, and all remaining hard liquor in the household will be poured out" DIRECT QUOTE
Normie's don't have this agreement saved in their phones, so that when the rules get disputed, or aren't slanting in abf's favor, the agreement can be referenced at a moments notice.
Normie's don't still have this list as a reminder.
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Old 09-12-2013, 11:59 PM
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Normies don't have to deal with the fact that SNOOPING is the only way they get any information and when they confront their AH, all he says is, "I can't believe you went through my shet..." and you feel BAD about doing it O.o Nevermind what you found when you snooped.
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Old 09-13-2013, 04:35 AM
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Normies don't have the investigative skills that would put a seasoned detective to shame! Holler if you hear me ladies!!! My A used to suggest I quit nursing school and be a cop!! Hahahaha....Sigh...the lengths I went through
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Old 09-13-2013, 09:29 AM
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A normie wouldn't describe an A, as "functioning"
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Old 09-13-2013, 09:38 AM
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A normie wouldn't be able to moonlight as the best private investigator in town.

A normie sleeps in their own bed - every night - except while on vacation.

Normies don't seek out friends to hang out with every night after work, because they don't want to go home.

Home actually feels like a HOME to normies.

Normies don't have a secret stack of moving boxes hidden in the camper.

Normies don't have their brother on standbye to help them move out on a Monday while their alcoholic partner is at work.
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Old 09-13-2013, 05:38 PM
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Normies don't know how it feels to be FURIOUS at your mother for calling at eight o'clock on a Friday because it woke him back up, and now you have to deal with him all over again.

First night in a week he's been drunk, but this time I didn't let my guard down. I enjoyed his non-drunk state, but I knew this would come around again. It was a nice week. Damn it.
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Old 09-13-2013, 06:48 PM
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Originally Posted by wysiwyg View Post
Normies don't know what it's like to think that the only way their partner will learn is if the worst case scenario actually plays out. And normies certainly don't know what it's like to witness that worst case scenario happen, and it never actually registers with their partner that it was the result of his/her actions. But he/she plays the victim role like a champ!
Stemming from this, a normie wouldn't be hoping that his/her A partner gets a warning bout of pancreatitis before their liver is damaged or something worse occurs.
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Old 09-13-2013, 07:16 PM
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A normie wouldn't read this thread and think they are normal.
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