Things a "normie" wouldn't know.... Part 3
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Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Silicon Valley, CA
Posts: 2,066
Wow.
Wish I would have known this 10 years ago! Nearly word for word this has been my experience with the in-laws.
Wish I would have known this 10 years ago! Nearly word for word this has been my experience with the in-laws.
Originally Posted by Charmed3 
Not sure if a normie would know this or not..... but the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
If the entire family of your qualifier are Alcoholics - even though he may hide it well until he wins you over - there is a good chance if he isn't sober, he is an A too!
And the family.... well they will welcome you in to the family because as my MIL said, I am so glad he finally has someone to take care of him so I don't have to worry about him anymore. And yes momma bear will very be happy until you start objecting to his drinking and she sides with him because facing his alcoholism means she has to face her own.... which is NEVER going to happen.
If the entire family of your qualifier are Alcoholics - even though he may hide it well until he wins you over - there is a good chance if he isn't sober, he is an A too!
And the family.... well they will welcome you in to the family because as my MIL said, I am so glad he finally has someone to take care of him so I don't have to worry about him anymore. And yes momma bear will very be happy until you start objecting to his drinking and she sides with him because facing his alcoholism means she has to face her own.... which is NEVER going to happen.
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Nowhere, VA
Posts: 540
Normies don't have to hear about how the father of their newborn child (literally, like 1 hour old!) was drinking a 6 pack in the hospital parking lot.
Normies don't get asked to smuggle in a tallboy beer for ABF when he's in the hospital for pancreatitis (I didn't do it though!)
Normies don't have to hear how its "normal" for one spouse to sleep on the sofa everynight.
Normies don't get asked to smuggle in a tallboy beer for ABF when he's in the hospital for pancreatitis (I didn't do it though!)
Normies don't have to hear how its "normal" for one spouse to sleep on the sofa everynight.
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Pa
Posts: 4,872
Normies don't go to a christening, when they are 8 months pregnant, get left alone the entire time, have their water break, go into labor, then have their AH drive them home, while drunk, and have him b!tch to you to whole time driving home, how you ruined his night. Then, get home, and he has to take a nap before bringing you to the hospital.
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Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Iowa
Posts: 3,050
Normies don't spend an entire night on their hands and knees cleaning up blood when they're 8 months pregnant after the alcoholic slices his hand open and is bleeding all over the house for hours until I wake up and call 911. He was blacked out and had no idea what was happening.
Normies don't get screamed at after the alcoholic is released from the hospital because the ER did a bac and recommended alcohol counseling so now "everyone thinks I have a drinking problem."
Duh.
Normies don't get screamed at after the alcoholic is released from the hospital because the ER did a bac and recommended alcohol counseling so now "everyone thinks I have a drinking problem."
Duh.
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Pa
Posts: 4,872
Normies, first of all, wouldn't be posting here, but I need to tell you what I just did.
I was looking for a post that I posted, and I couldn't find it !!!!! I thought I knew who I was posting to. I just wanted to make sure that I posted things correctly, meaning, say what I mean, don't say it mean. And I couldn't find it. My first thought was that what I posted was so weird the mods removed it. Would a normie know that, would a normie think that?
I was looking for a post that I posted, and I couldn't find it !!!!! I thought I knew who I was posting to. I just wanted to make sure that I posted things correctly, meaning, say what I mean, don't say it mean. And I couldn't find it. My first thought was that what I posted was so weird the mods removed it. Would a normie know that, would a normie think that?
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Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Iowa
Posts: 3,050
Thanks Amy. Normies don't know that feeling of doubting yourself to the point where you wonder if you're crazy.
They also don't know that hydrogen peroxide will lift fresh bloodstains out of almost any carpet or fabric. I've told that to a couple of people as a cleaning tip and they looked at me like I'd grown a second head.
Normies don't wake up to a house that looks like the set of Texas Chainsaw Massacre and think, if I burn the house down, I won't have to clean this up.
They also don't know that hydrogen peroxide will lift fresh bloodstains out of almost any carpet or fabric. I've told that to a couple of people as a cleaning tip and they looked at me like I'd grown a second head.
Normies don't wake up to a house that looks like the set of Texas Chainsaw Massacre and think, if I burn the house down, I won't have to clean this up.
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Pa
Posts: 4,872
Originally Posted by ladyscribbler
Normies don't wake up to a house that looks like the set of Texas Chainsaw Massacre and think, if I burn the house down, I won't have to clean this up.
I remember thinking something for a really really long time. I was thinking that I already spent 25+ years in h3ll, if I kill him, I'll get another 25 years. I didn't think I deserved that, so I didn't kill him, and I left instead.
It is really amazing though where our head goes, and where our thoughts go.
And I know, I am really starting to sound crazy here. Did I actually say starting to sound crazy?
Sometimes I want Lulu's avatar.
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Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Silicon Valley, CA
Posts: 2,066
Yikes. Can I just say that a few months (and lots of counseling) makes SUCH a difference in persoective. When I wrote my post I was totally thinking that normies wouldn't know those things because they wouldn't be married to such a crazy person. Now I realize that normies don't know those things because normies don't allow their lives to get so completely and totally out of control. Normies wouldn't have experience with situations that I have been in because they look at an active alcoholic and walk the other way instead if trying to control and change them. They don't make excuses for them or try to fix them or convince themselves that things are getting better or changing just because their partner didn't drink/yell/belittle for a day or a week or a month. Stung fail. I am not a normie, therefore I would not know what it's like to be a normie, especially since I married another non-normie. I have never been a normie and never will be one. My biggest project now is to try to raise my kids to be normies now that I know I need to raise them to be NOT like me.
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Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: The Bright Side of the Moon
Posts: 528
Speaking of newborns and raising kids... Normies don't know what it is like to have "friends" come over with beer when their kid is 2 nights old. They don't know what it's like to be sitting in a recliner facing away from the TV while their partner maniacally talks through a movie everyone else can see. They don't know what it's like to get up and leave that situation, try to go to bed and and have their partners pass out on the bedroom floor when they said they had come in to "say goodnight." They don't know what it's like to have to choose between trying to sleep with a party going on, knowing they'll need to wake up in 2 hours to feed the baby and getting up to kick everyone out.
I chose to get up with my 2-days-post-partum body and tell everyone to get out.
I chose to get up with my 2-days-post-partum body and tell everyone to get out.
Last edited by LightInside; 04-19-2014 at 12:51 AM. Reason: Typo
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Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 1,218
Originally Posted by amy55
Normies don't go to a christening, when they are 8 months pregnant, get left alone the entire time, have their water break, go into labor, then have their AH drive them home, while drunk, and have him b!tch to you to whole time driving home, how you ruined his night. Then, get home, and he has to take a nap before bringing you to the hospital.
WOW.
(((((((hugs)))))))
Peace.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 1,218
Originally Posted by Blossom717
Normies don't have to hear about how the father of their newborn child (literally, like 1 hour old!) was drinking a 6 pack in the hospital parking lot.
Normies don't get asked to smuggle in a tallboy beer for ABF when he's in the hospital for pancreatitis (I didn't do it though!)
Normies don't have to hear how its "normal" for one spouse to sleep on the sofa everynight.
Normies don't get asked to smuggle in a tallboy beer for ABF when he's in the hospital for pancreatitis (I didn't do it though!)
Normies don't have to hear how its "normal" for one spouse to sleep on the sofa everynight.
What a lovely photo you have for your profile pic!!!
Peace.
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 31
Normies would not have to try and sleep on a weekday night with earplugs in and headphones over them because the ABF (now X) is in the next room with the stereo at max volume level. And of course, turning the volume down is completely unreasonable and you are being a "party pooper".
Normies would not be in bed vomiting while the ABF is outside enjoying drinking and not even checking if you are ok.
Normies don't know what it's like to prepare a nice meal and for the ABF to come home with beer and not want to eat. And if you try and anticipate if he will drink and therefore do not prepare a meal you get screamed at for being a lazy b#tch.
Normies can go out for a meal without worrying about the ABF getting drunk and being embarrassing and then being forced to drive you both home and stop for more alcohol
I am sure I will think of others....
Normies would not be in bed vomiting while the ABF is outside enjoying drinking and not even checking if you are ok.
Normies don't know what it's like to prepare a nice meal and for the ABF to come home with beer and not want to eat. And if you try and anticipate if he will drink and therefore do not prepare a meal you get screamed at for being a lazy b#tch.
Normies can go out for a meal without worrying about the ABF getting drunk and being embarrassing and then being forced to drive you both home and stop for more alcohol
I am sure I will think of others....
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Nowhere, VA
Posts: 540
I might be the only one who has done this but...
Normies don't think about calling 911 anonymously to report their ABF driving drunk, or to report what other illegal activities they are doing in the garage.
Normies don't think about calling 911 anonymously to report their ABF driving drunk, or to report what other illegal activities they are doing in the garage.
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 485
Originally Posted by ladyscribbler
Thanks Amy. Normies don't know that feeling of doubting yourself to the point where you wonder if you're crazy.
They also don't know that hydrogen peroxide will lift fresh bloodstains out of almost any carpet or fabric. I've told that to a couple of people as a cleaning tip and they looked at me like I'd grown a second head.
Normies don't wake up to a house that looks like the set of Texas Chainsaw Massacre and think, if I burn the house down, I won't have to clean this up.
They also don't know that hydrogen peroxide will lift fresh bloodstains out of almost any carpet or fabric. I've told that to a couple of people as a cleaning tip and they looked at me like I'd grown a second head.
Normies don't wake up to a house that looks like the set of Texas Chainsaw Massacre and think, if I burn the house down, I won't have to clean this up.
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Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: New England
Posts: 12
Originally Posted by EmmyG
Yikes this one took me back. A few years ago AH decided to take drink and take prescription meds at the same time. He ended up accidentally cutting his hand and I got to come home to what looked like a crime scene in my bedroom. What a nightmare, yuck bad memories.
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